Hey guys, recently I've met this girl online, we've met up the other day and had a first date and she said she had fun. She also said sorry I don't kiss on the first date even though I never tried to kiss her. We've been chatting up and everything and tonight I made a mistake. I've asked her if she has a nice booty and that offended her. I apologized to her and I said I was joking but she said "even though you were kidding, I've had situations like that in the past and that's where I draw the line"

Have I fucked up with her that bad that she won't talk to me again or can I recover from that one? Thanks.

yeah, that's a rookie mistake. I wouldn't joke like that with a girl until I have slept with her. What did you do on the first date? how can you not check out the essentials?

Anyway, send her a low-investment text tomorrow or the day after. Maybe use call-back humor. I wouldn't sweat it.

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Yeah, don't sweat it.

Next time, don't make a joke like that unless you actually know the girl can take kind of joke. However, if you're normally like that, where you ask a girl if she has a 'nice booty,' and she gets offended, DO NOT APOLOGIZE. If that's what you like to ask, then ask her, and if she's get offended, that's her fault, tell her to not be so serious.
I don't care what's happened in a girls past, I will not be judged based on some girls f'ed up perceptions of what she thinks is acceptable or not.
Best,
Samex

Thanks guys. Yeah, I usually ask about it since I like girls with a nice ass. The weird thing is, she likes to joke a lot. On the first date nothing special, went to the dinner and a movie. On the first date, I usually don't like to push things. I know its a rookie mistake. I'm trying to get back into the game and I'm being rusty. The first girl I spoke to like that and asked her about her booty, she sent me a pic of her ass in a thong but she was more sexual than this one.
How do I transition from a normal convo to a sexual one? I mean I used that question to kind of jokingly transition to sexual talk but it back fired. I felt like that for the past week we were only joking, building slow attraction but nothing sexual was going there.
Thanks again guys.

If you are rusty, why do you need to transition to go from flirty text convo to a sexual one???? get good at keeping the banter going, and plan a date so you can maybe actually score. if you are really that desperate for naked pics, internet is at your service.

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I guess I can answer this one. I talk with some chicks about sex all the time like it was just talking about weather, when you got the conversation there you can use something like "You know, its quite rare these days getting good sex bla bla"

How you get there? You just start using some stories (funny if you can make it) which include something sexual. "You know today, I was walking home and my eyes almost popped out, I saw two like 50 year old having sex behind a dumpster". Then she will go "WHAT HAHA", you go "Yea... I think Im gonna see wet dreams about this. Hope you get some too lol" or you can ask "What you think about having sex in public?", and there we go, we have a sexual conversation and then you can just bust her "Hahahah yer sure your one of those exhibitionists, should have known!"

Good stuff, thanks a lot to each and every one.

Here's the thing, unless the girl is just some slam-hound you picked up at a sleezy club, you want to give her the chance to feel like she is a "respectable" girl. Most respectable girls want to actually get to know a guy a little bit before kissing or talking about sexual stuff. And girls are different, so some will have a higher threshold for this than others. You have to work it out in your head as to what kind of girl it is before you start making your move. One way to do this is by analyzing her words and behavior. Does she use curse words? Does she talk or hint about sexual things or the way people look physically? Is she flirtacious?

If you misread the girl and start getting too sexual too fast, it will put her off and make you seem needy and creepy. The same way that a girl pretends to be the classy type that doesn't put out on the first date, YOU need to pretend to be a gentleman who doesn't expect girls to put out on the first date. I know you want to kiss her and feel on her, and I know we are taught to escalate, but it's more important to read the girl and play her accordingly. It's okay to wait a few extra days before starting the sexual escalation stuff, as long as you get what you want eventually.

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“Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'!” ~Audrey Hepburn

If girls are so different, how do you approach and open in a "neutral way", so that you will not appear too cocky or too much as an AFC guy ? What specific signs I should look before approaching a girl, without being a stalker or creepy ? The more gentelman method or the jerk guy ? (usually the first impression is deceptive from her, so how to "calibrate" ? )

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NIHIL SINE DEO et...... SEX ( I hope so! )

If it's online you can look at their pictures and read their profile to get a feel for what type they are. Then ask some probing questions or make certain commentary which will prompt her to reveal her personality type.

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“Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'!” ~Audrey Hepburn

She got offended that you say nice booty, that is her problem, you did nothing wrong, the apologizing was what you did wrong, stop putting that girl on a pedestal....

hb: i don't kiss on the first date

you: okay, i never said i was going to kiss you we are just meeting to see if we get along or if there is a connection.

the other stuff:

you: do you have a nice booty(the timing and the way you ask was probably uncalibrated not the question)

this is how i would have ask:

me: so how do you look like:
her i am blonde, blue eyes blah blah blah
me: cool, but go down
her: what do you mean go down
me: how does your body look like? I am kind of an ass man...

Is ok to be CONGRUENT, with your desires, intent etc... That in itself is attractive




By the way don't do stupid dates...
post746316.html#p746316


Dude you are too needy: "how do i recover from that one"

"i apologize"

telegraphing neediness(by you posting about that girl, you are already needy, she is not posting in a female forum about you, and what to do with you"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YNovswAlmio

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Thank you so much. Here is an update. I gave her some time to cool off and she did. We kept on texting but this time I didn't rush. Last Tuesday, I asked her to go get some Starbucks, she said she was sick and that we will do something as soon as she gets better. I said ok cool, get well. After that, I didn't ask her out again, waited to see if she will initiate that.

I would also not text her the whole day and she would call me after her work. A few days ago, she asks if I'm not doing anything, we can hang out this weekend. I said we can, I'm watching UFC 156 on Sat with my friends but you're more than welcome to come by and watch it with is. I really didn't expect her to say yes so we made plans. She was suppose to meet me at the local Buffalo Wild Wings around 9-9:30pm after she gets off work. Later that night, she texts me saying I won't get off work until 11 I text her back saying to come by after. She never showed up nor texted back afterwards.

So she stood me up for the second date/hang out lol. How to deal with this. I know that I shouldn't show any emotion that it bothers me, etc. I know she is going to give me some bs story why. Should act like it never happened and when she sets up the next date, should I stand her up? How do I stay in control, show her what she has done was wrong and that I won't tolerate that crap without being bitchy, whiny, etc.

Thanks again.