| Hi everyone.
Brief background:
I lurk this board for tips all the time, and I've made so many positive changes these past few months. I finally encountered a situation where I need more personalized support to figure out what to do. This is a girl that is basically my girlfriend. She's alluded to us being exclusive already, but we never really formalized it. Well, she asked me to flip her claddagh ring, which I'll admit I did without even knowing or asking what that meant. Yeah, pretty stupid of me....and eventually it came up in convo and she realized I did it without knowing the significance. She seemed upset, but asked me if she should keep it that way and I said it's fine.
Girlfriend:
So, I've been seeing this amazing girl for 10 weeks now, and I feel so good whenever I'm with her. She's a very thoughtful girl that actually listens to me, and usually does small favors for me like bakes me muffins (omg they're so good) or gives me small gifts. I always try to keep our dates interesting and unique. We've done many things, such as ice skating, bowling, watching the holiday parade, exploring new places, movie at my place, ... just to name a few. Every time we see each other, we always end up making out for hours, usually in a parking lot but also in my room obviously. Recently we f-closed, and we've already done it about 10 times already!
Last week:
Okay, so that's the background on the girl I'm seeing. So far so good, right? Well, a lot changed last week.
We usually hang out once a week, but last week we saw each other 4 times. The first night, it was Christmas and she wanted me to meet her family. I went through with it, and while I could have done a better job of showing them how awesome I am, I didn't make a fool of myself either. It was actually quite interesting at times, lol. So afterwards, we left and drove around...nothing was open so we ended up just hooking up/fucking again. She expressed concern that all we do is end up in parking lots and fool around, which I tried to reassure her was okay and we do a lot of awesome things aside from that. 2 days later, she asked me if she could come over, so I said yes. She got to meet some of my family, then up to my room for lots of making out, sex, and otherwise just hung out and used computer, talked, watched tv. I would say we had a great time. So saturday we hang out again and go on an adventure, checking out a couple places I wanted to see. Once again, this led to make out/sex. So yeah, we really saw a lot of each other...
The bad night:
So far, all you probably gathered was we go on interesting dates that always leads to making out and sex. However, Sunday she calls me up at night telling me she's having an anxiety attack and wants me to be with her. Bros, I should NOT have went. I had a gut feeling that I would not be able to handle this situation well, but I told her to meet me somewhere and we could sit for a little. Basically, she confessed something she alluded to for a long time. She has anxiety issues, which she does seek professional help. It's been under control as long as I've known her. She's seen many professionals, and is on medication. Not only did I do a terrible job of consoling her, but I also tried throwing in too much humor / a little cocky to lighten the mood. She didn't get mad at me, but I feel like a retard for the dumb comments I made. Anyways, she ended up saying that we shouldn't talk anymore, because she feels bad/guilty about her issues. Instead of re-assuring her that everything is okay, I told her that she should do what she feels is best, and if that means not talking to me then she should do that. Why would I say such a stupid thing?? She asked me if things are going good between us, which I said seriously "yes, of course!". Anyways, in a very anxious/upset tone, she told me she has feelings for me. How did I respond? "That's okay if you have feelings for me! Nothing wrong with that"....something like that. What the fuck? Again, I should have re-assured her and told her the truth, that I also have feelings for her! So before she left, we made out pretty hard and that was that. She also told me she kinda thinks I'm only interested in her for 'one thing'...which I did joke about but told her that is completely not true.
The aftermath:
I texted her good night when I got home, and we had a small text convo the next day. I didn't text her new years, and neither did she. I actually went to a party and had a great time. To do something different, I sent her a text last night around 2am, just a little tease. She hasn't replied to it! She always responds to at least my first text. I'm suspecting that she's upset at me for not being supportive of her issues and for not re-assuring her about us by letting her know that I do have feelings for her and telling her how much I care about her.
The solution..?
I'm not sure what to do at this point. Should I send another text tomorrow? Call her? And what should I say? Keep it light and flirty, or talk about what happened Sunday? I seeded the idea of her coming out with me Saturday already, but we never formalized those plans. I just want things to go back to the way they were before Sunday, as if that night never happened.
I'm already anticipating comments about nexting her for a girl without issues, but I've dated so many girls in the last 6 months and honestly I like this girl so much that I want to give her a chance! Thank you for those that read this and help me out.
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CHAT