So there's this girl in a university club I'm in that I've been subtly flirting with for a few weeks. She has a bf apparently in this same club. But she shows clear signs that she's interested and verbally hinted at wanting to see me before everyone leaves town for the holidays.

Normally this would be a green light to just be very direct and escalate things quickly. But I've already introduced myself to her bf and will see him regularly in the future. While at a kegger hosted by the club, I think she said something about them being friends for a long time, and not actually dating. But I was drunk and can't remember fully. So a few weeks ago I decided to test her in front of him and say "wow your boyfriend is hilarious!". And her reply was "he is".

This girl isn't the slutty type. Might even be a virgin. I don't want her to feel like a slut and I really don't want awkwardness between me and the bf. So I figure using the boyfriend destroyer (assuming there is even a relationship) is the best move here. But she NEVER mentions him or talks about him. My question to you guys is should I even bother using the boyfriend destroyer and try to get them to break up before crossing the line and going for a kiss (or more), or should I just forget he exists?

EDIT: And if you say use the bf destroyer, how would I slip that into a conversation if she never mentions him?

If a girl is a virgin then she can't have a boyfriend. A boyfriend is the guy who regularly gets to have sex with a girl who is committed to him. If she is a virgin, then it is just a little-kiddy/pretend relationship.

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“Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'!” ~Audrey Hepburn

More info: they went to the same high school. I saw some tagged pictures of them from two years ago (seemed to be just friends in the picture). So I think they were friends for a long time and their friendship sort of slowly evolved into a relationship (assuming there is a relationship). This is fucked. I'd feel bad if I ruin their friendship but on the other hand she's hot and into me and this "bf" doesn't own her.

This isn't exactly true bro. I know a fair few couples (some christian) who are in a relationship but not having sex till marriage. It's still a relationship if both parties are committed to each other such as no kissing others or getting frisky or I dunno blowjobs and shit. A relationship isn't just based around sex. Hell sex is a very small part of a PROPER relationship.

OP:

If she isn't happy in the relationship then go for it.

If she is then don't be an arse, just leave her alone. Plenty of other girls out there to fuck.

Also:

So a few weeks ago I decided to test her in front of him and say "wow your boyfriend is hilarious!". And her reply was "he is".

Personally I think this is a stupid test. In this sort of instance it doesn't matter if she considers him to be her boyfriend or not. If he considers her to be his girlfriend then she would say "he is" just to make sure she doesn't upset him.

You should have gotten her alone after meeting her boyfriend and such and just say "Your boyfriend seems proper nice" then you would get a legit 1to1 response from her. Not something she thought up on the spot to make the SPAM comfortable.

ALSO pretty much EVERY girl thinks the rule "oh if I'm unavailable guys will want me more" I get she's interested in you but she's not gonna drop her panties and bend over easily man. Seems to me from what you've been saying she's using this guy as a "placeholder" till a new guy comes along and demands sex/hatefucks her or something.

lol this seems to apply to my situation. I called her yesterday to ask her out. First I just did like five minutes of small talk, then I casually asked her if she likes burritos. It turns out she's a huge fan and knows a shit ton of places and mentioned a bunch of places downtown instead of on campus. I then proceed to not so directly ask her out, which might have been a mistake.

me: "I don't have time to take you there, but we can grab one on campus if you're down. Monday or Tuesday is fine with me. Pick one."

her: ...

me: *I heard at this point it's good to not break the silence, so I don't make a sound.*

her: "Well this is a little far in advance..."

me: "You the type who makes plans the day of?"

her: "You can say that."

After some more small talk, I say

me: "Well don't worry about it we got months to get to know each other."

her: *lol*

(BIG mistake. She's leaving the country until next semester in a few days so if I ask her out again, I'm gonna contradict myself and look desperate.)

Then after a while she says she has to study.

This confuses me since the first time I called her she seemed really into me. She also seemed really into me when I randomly bumped into her at the gym. I guess my mistake was not asking her out then. When I called her she was studying and didn't sound that interested in talking. I feel like I should let her go and try again next term with her. Her boyfriend (if there is even a relationship) is highly likely to be a placeholder though so fuck him. Or I'm really naive and there IS a relationship and she's rejecting me cause she'll feel guilty.

In most cases, the boyfriend is just a detail for me. Actually, one of my fetishes is going after married women. Based on your description, it does not seem to be such a serious relationship, so if I were you, I would go for it.

I do remember once, way back, that a chick was going after me, and she was going to drop her long term bf for me. I know a bit about the guy, and I think he is a great catch (he is a doctor, good looks, great personality) for her, so that is what I told her to fend her off. It backfired, since she pursued me even stronger, but I held my grounds. I am now glad I did not break up their relationship.