he guys, looking to get some straightforward/blunt advice:

If youve read my introduction post youll know I dont have much game/experience picking up chicks but I have always been in a relationship one way or another.

A few months back I met a girl (Natalie)through a friend again, she apparantly was head over heels for me but I didnt get to see her again for approx. a month? 2 weeks ago our mutual friend text me Natalie's number saying "natalie really likes you and want to meet up" a few days later i txt her my name and asked her how she is, she replied a few hours later:

"hey how are you, its Kalvin"
- "who are you exactly?"
"Kalvin, monica's friend"
- "oh hi, how are you "
"im good thanks, I havent seen you in a while how are you?"
- ":D very good, just been busy with work"
"you should let me take you out soon, id like to see you again"
- "sure im off on tuesdays/wednesdays and sundays"
"ok just let me know which you prefer"
- "great ill let you know!"

BOOM! this is where something happened to her. She was either abducted by aliens, had a severe knock to the head, changed her mind about me, met someone else, decided she needs to play hard to get or has a boyfriend and is trying not to get caught?

- no word from her for a few days - I decided to re-initiate some convo and set a date for meeting:

"hey hows it going?"
- 5 hours later -
- "i have a headache"
"hope its not too bad, pop a few painkillers"
- "kalvin i did, i have bad migranes it doesnt help"
- thought this was a bit of a wall shes putting up? so i backed off a bit -
"sorry to hear that, hope you get better soon"

the following day:

"hey you feeling better?"
- 2 days later -
- "im ok kalvin, you?"
"im good thank you, what are you upto?"
- "im at work, do you want to meet up when my shift ends?"
"what time do you get off, ill take you for a drink but im slightly busy from 7-9" (i had taekwondo)
- " thats going to be pretty late, maybe tomorrow then?"
"yeah sure let me know what time suits you"

she didnt reply, i didnt chase that night. No messages for a few days, i didnt want to initiate again and seem too needy so I let the few days slide by. It came to sunday i text her around mid-day (which i know shes not working from previous texts)

"hi, hows your day off from work going?"
- didnt reply -

I got a bit angry at this point, felt like she seriously deserved a tiger-uppercut to the jaw! maybe I messed up by texting again:

"are you busy or should i take a hint"
- approx 3 hours later -
- "sorry kalvin, i was at the gym"
"no worries, if you dont have plans tonight do you want to meet up?"

no reply again for a few days at this point i thought i dont have anything to lose just be blunt and move on:

"why do you not reply at times, is this a thing you do in general or is it just directed towards me?"
- "im at the gym kalvin"
"im not talking about right now, i mean in general? Dont worry about it."

that last msg was sent 2 days ago, im not fussed if i messed up. mixed signals and mind-fuq isnt something for me i just want someone to make sense of what happened?

so please: analyze & criticize

I don't want to state the obvious, but you asked for blunt so here goes: you're making yourself too available, it probably even comes off as needy. She was totally digging you from the start, she even gave you her work schedule without you asking for it. When a girl does that, you don't ask what time she prefers, just tell her when you want to go out.

Then, you got her to *ask you* if you wanted to go out with her when she got off work. That's a huge IOI.

And this is where you could do better. Next time she (or any girl) asks you to meet up after she's seemed kind of flaky for a few days, tell her you'll be busy. Don't say "Sorry, I can't because blah blah blah", say "I actually have plans with a friend, lets do it on blah blah blah". Make yourself abundant, and your value to her will plummet. Make yourself scarce, and your value will go up. And NEVER ask a girl "should I take the hint". Your frame needs a little bit of work, but you seem like a relatively confident guy. And if not, you should be. This girl is throwing herself at you, she just wanted you to catch her and sweep her off her feet. So take charge, be the man, and tell her when/where/what you two will be doing.

P.S. usually when a chick uses your name in texts and in real life ("I'm ok kalvin", "Sorry kalvin", etc.) she's trying to seduce you. Watch out for any tricks like this she pulls. She may just want attention. If that's the case, then you can get her easily if you just don't play into her games. Just remember, you're the one gaming her!

Oh and I almost forgot some concrete advice: if she hasn't texted you within a week or so, send her THE BEST TEXT EVER (not an original with me, lots of people know it but it's still useful at starting up a conversation with you as the dominant one) "Holy shit I just met your twin at (whatever place you might have been that you could talk about if she asks why you were there)." This makes her jealous, and now that another girl looks like her, she wants to prove she has more than looks, causing her to qualify herself. If she says "So you met a super sexy chick" or something like that, just say "Haha yea right". Follow it up with a "hey we never got to go out, let's meet up Sunday". She will most likely agree. Then on saturday, flake out on her (my friend's wedding/ birthday/ what the fuck ever) and reschedule for tuesday. At that point she will raise your value because you ditched her.

-Omarr

ahh excellent info. i see where i made mistakes.

So whats the latest Kalvin?

Omar - That twin line is awesome. Will use it asap, thanks.

Ummm your only mistake is that you didn't take charge at the very beginning. When she told you when she was available, you should have picked a day and time. You didn't need to tell her what you'd be doing. You could have left that for a day or two before. But by not taking initiative, you conveyed yourself as not being a man who's not in command.

Then you just fucked it up more by 1) insisting she pick the date/time and 2) complaining about her taking time to reply.

You didn't even need text game for this. She already said she'd go out with you.

_________________
Before she can respect you, you need to respect yourself.

I like Omarr's idea. Very cool stuff.

Another method you might like to take is just throwing a funny joke her way just to pump good emotions her way. "20 years ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have no Cash, no Hope and no Jobs. Please dont let Kevin Bacon die." is one of my personal favourites

If all else fails just reach out and grab her tits-- bitches love that shit

thanks for showing interest guys, bit of an update:

I text her yesterday with the "met your twin" text, she instantly replied some nonsense like "huh what?? where?!" we got to texting again and had a bit of a flirt session.

She said she wants to meet up this week if im not busy, we arranged a meet up, talked some more.....
THEN BAM!

she went all strange with 1 word answers, it didnt really come as a shock (i assumed this chicks got problems or likes mind-fuking me). I didnt show any negative reaction (i was pretty busy all day so i didnt really get a chance to think about her), she gave me some crap about her ex-boyfriend wanting to get back together with her which is making her confused. I didnt ask/force any info but she felt the need to talk about their on-off relationship and how he's cheated on her... hmmmm

my conclusion is shes not interested in long-term with me, i think shes having a rough time with her boyfriend and wants some attention/sex from other dudes maybe as revenge or something? shes not bad looking but im not desperate (yet lol)
contemplating if i should just move on or try a hit'n'run. either way i cant long term with this one, thats for sure.
yeah I think youre right, lesson learnt.
lol, ill try squeeze this in for next time!
nice light-up t-shirt.

Personally I think she's testing you. You already showed yourself as being "beta/AFC" by moaning about texting/asking her when she wants to meet. Here's some analysis for you:
I don't know what your text conversation was like but I would have started the flirt session, built some attraction then just stopped texting her back when she was at the height of "OMG IM GETTING ATTENTION" mindset. Just a note for ya.
She's testing you, you have already shown that you are a lil bit AFC/BETA by nagging about texting/meeting up. However you've pulled it together and you've started to behave Alpha. She's just testing to see if you break. It could be unconscious or conscious but basically she's seeing if she can use you to simply talk about her feelings. DO NOT talk/comfort her about this shit till after you've had sex with her. Treat it as a reward but DON'T EVER bring up her ex-boyfriend. If she texts you talking about it simply message her back about something random and if she continues trying to talk about it, freeze out till the next day and message her a random opener. Here's some random crap I would use:

Her: OMG my ex cheated on me blahdeblah talking about it just makes me think about him more so I'll just go back to him if you fall for this shit. I'm a stupid girl btw.

Me: Chinese or Indian? <she will act all confused with this one, perfect opportunity to neg her and get her worried that you think less of her. Just message her random shit, don't fall into the "my ex boyfriend" frame.

[quote="BITmixit"]Personally I think she's testing you. You already showed yourself as being "beta/AFC" by moaning about texting/asking her when she wants to meet. Here's some analysis for you:

[quote]I text her yesterday with the "met your twin" text, she instantly replied some nonsense like "huh what?? where?!" we got to texting again and had a bit of a flirt session.[/quote]

I don't know what your text conversation was like but I would have started the flirt session, built some attraction then just stopped texting her back when she was at the height of "OMG IM GETTING ATTENTION" mindset. Just a note for ya.

[quote]She said she wants to meet up this week if im not busy, we arranged a meet up, talked some more.....
THEN BAM! She went all strange with 1 word answers, it didnt really come as a shock (i assumed this chicks got problems or likes mind-fuking me). I didnt show any negative reaction (i was pretty busy all day so i didnt really get a chance to think about her), she gave me some crap about her ex-boyfriend wanting to get back together with her which is making her confused. I didnt ask/force any info but she felt the need to talk about their on-off relationship and how he's cheated on her... hmmmm[/quote]

She's testing you, you have already shown that you are a lil bit AFC/BETA by nagging about texting/meeting up. However you've pulled it together and you've started to behave Alpha. She's just testing to see if you break. It could be unconscious or conscious but basically she's seeing if she can use you to simply talk about her feelings. DO NOT talk/comfort her about this shit till after you've had sex with her. Treat it as a reward but DON'T EVER bring up her ex-boyfriend. If she texts you talking about it simply message her back about something random and if she continues trying to talk about it, freeze out till the next day and message her a random opener. Here's some random crap I would use:

Her: OMG my ex cheated on me blahdeblah talking about it just makes me think about him more so I'll just go back to him if you fall for this shit. I'm a stupid girl btw.

Me: Chinese or Indian? <she will act all confused with this one, perfect opportunity to neg her and get her worried that you think less of her. Just message her random shit, don't fall into the "my ex boyfriend" frame.[/quote]
sounds good, ill put this to play. good overall analysis and smart way of handling the ex-boyfriend thing.
her mind games are really putting me off, i will not spend much energy on this one, i wont dismiss it but i wont chase.

Good planning bro, keep at it. I've got a girl who throws mind games at me all the time. Obviously being needy doesn't work and reacting definitely doesn't work. The only way to behave is to be indifferent which you are doing, she will probably unconsciously/consciously notice this and either get more attached/chase more.

yeah thanks for the info/help. much appreciated, thank god for this site lol