This is my 1st post and its pretty long, but hopefully interesting to someone and hopefully someone KNOWS how to tell me what to do to get this girl back.

This will be a long post but hopefully an interesting one.

Ok i hate that fact that i am having to post this but here goes :

I met this girl off the POF dating site. She is an incredibly hott 25 year old black girl with 2 kids actually, a one and a four year old. I am a good
looking guy by most girls standards probably like a 7 maybe. I am a 44 year old white male, in shape, rock n roll style, musician as in playing out at good bars around where i live. I could probably pass for 34.
I have a secret weapon and its definitely the Music for me. I am a good musician, i sing , write and play all kinds of stuff. It has got me laid many many times. I have banged over 300 women easily. I normally know how to play the game, and i do it well. But for some Damn reason, when i really really really dig the girl, i cant help myself from showing it too much and being too nice or too complimentary to her or whatever. But anyways i think i come across as needy but ONLY when i am really really into them. This is about once every 5 years to give you a perspective.

This girl is a 10 in my book. She is a RN , has a nice house, from what i have seen in photos, has recently gone thru a divorce and has been single for like 9 months. SHe has a Model face, the most beautiful lips you can imagine(not too big, not too small)just fucking perfect Lips. She has an ass that would make anyone cry..,,and nice little perky tits.

One Big thing, i tell one Lie and one Lie only on my POF profile, it says i am 34. I am 44. I always tell the girls by the second date, and after they care for me at least somewhat. It works like a charm. Otherwise they fucking stereotype me and put in the box with their granddad. I have NEVER been married, i have NO kids and no baggage.

One more thing about Me, i am a player and i am just done playing, i have actually wanted to be married and have a family for quite some time but i am very picky. I somehow have dated 3 girls for the last 3 years simultaneously and only within the last 3 months have i finally pissed them all off enough to leave me...and guess what? i dont give a flying fuck, this is the truth. I rarely have feelings of the Heart sort of kind, but when i do...man is that a different story.

Now for the story of the Girl who got my goat and refuses to give it back.

Ok this is what happens in order and man i hate to say it, but i was fucking crazy about this girl. She was just one of those girls you could suck on her toes and not give a flying fuck and be happy about it. She is that pretty.

We send a few messages back and forth on POF, i arouse her interest enough to want to talk to me, she ask for my number to text me, and of course i give it to her. We talk that nite, this was on thursday Nov.15th.

Everything goes really well, we agree to go out before the weekend is over. I end up asking her out on friday afternoon the next day for a drink. She says yes, but later says no that she forgot she has to eat with her mom. I say fine, its all good. I let it go and bite my nails playing the waiting game and it works...i never text or call again and Saturday nite the Next nite Nov.17th rolls around . She calls me a 9pm at nite and wants to meet for drinks. I say i was getting ready to go out but yea i guess i can meet her for a bit.

We meet at the local applebees, she is fucking finer than her beautiful ass pics. She is dressed very classy and sexy. We talk for 4 hours till 1 am there and everything is going great. She basically told me her whole fucking life story. She tells me where she works, goes to chuch, hangs out...she holds no info back from me. SHe is also very sweet acting, tells me stories of holding dying patients hands all the time being a nurse. IT really turns me on because i have a big weakness for compassionate girls.

I know that applebees is about to close so i ask if she wants to come back to my house and maybe build a fire in the fireplace and listen to some music and drink a little more wine. SHe says sure right out of the gate and we pay the check and leave right than.

At this point , i am on cloud nine , having got the BIG yes answer to go back alone to my place with her , being this is our first date and off of a dating site , which some women are really careful about.

WE get back to my place, and it really couldnt go any better. I play here songs i have wrote on my guitar, she says it almost made her cry...its all good. I compliment her quite often becuz i just couldnt hardly stop myself. This goes on for about 2 hours. By the way she has been on a couch by herself the whole time, i am right next to her on this little loveseat thing which is separate...all right in front of a roaring fireplace...candles, she was digging it for sure.

Now she gets up and comes and sits with me, on her own initiative and wants me to hold her as im playing my guitar. Im a regular boner factory at this point. Now i start to kiss her and it goes great. SHe is laughing and fun and seems to be having the time of her life. I am having the time of mine..lol. I tell her i want her to see some videos of music (not mine) that i just like, so we do that. Now i am curled up with her on the same couch and we watch some cool shit, she says she loves the same music and i feel a connection with her because i tend to judge people if they like fucked up music of dont like what i like..lol.

This is where it gets really fucking interesting.

Its probably 3 am we have been kissing and snuggling for maybe another almost hour. I am in hog heaven. I am about to have a starburst blast off if you know what i mean. WE have only kissed at this point.

Now she turns around and tells me She cant take it anymore, that it has been 9 months for her and proceeds to get up and get completely naked right there in front of me. I go to Cloud 37 at this point , if there is such a place. I am on a euphoric fucking high at this point, but also nervous because i really fucking dig this girl.

At this point I tell her Not here lets head for the bedroom. She follows me to the bedroom , once there, she is taking my clothes off and you can tell she wants it bad. Now I will not give you the graphic details but we end up screwing for almost 2 hours . We do it in like 4 different positions. She is the LOUDEST girl that I have ever been with in my life and it turns me the fuck on…Bigtime. She says she is cuming like 3 different times in 3 different positions, and from the noise she made, I believe her. I mean unless she is an Actress on the scale of Meryl Strep I really think she must have got off.

Ok, so she wears me out , im old remember…lol..and now I am just spent. Well, I need a drink so I go get a coke when we are done , im gone maybe 2 minutes..and when I come back she is already getting her bra and panties back on and looks like she is leaving or something. I say : “ hey , don’t leave, lay back down” ….she says; “ its 6 am in the morning , I have to be at church with my mom, I need to go” , I say : “ don’t go yet..come here” …she reluctantly lays back down and we kiss and hug for about a minute or so. She than gets back up and heads for the bedroom door. This time I don’t object and just follow her.

Now we are back in the main room of the house where her clothes are scattered everywhere. She is getting dressed quickly and I just watch , she is just as Beautiful as it gets so I am hating it that the clothes are going back on. Now she is finally getting to the point where she puts her Winter Coat on and earlier she has told me she is a twilight movie freak…I am not but I tell her anyway at this point : “ hey , we should go see that new twilight movie together” …she says “ aww, you would go see twilight with me?” …I say : “ hell yea , I would to see it with You.” . Now she heads for the door , we kiss and hug briefly and she walks out and leaves.

Now I am on CLOUD 477 about as far up as a Male can get from this type of experience. I am feeling great about everything… I really believe she had a great time too. I am confident I will hear from or see her again ,,, and soon I think.

Now she had me so high I cant sleep until like 9 am….ALL I can think about is this girl. I am wondering if she could be the one I have waited for.

Now let the Doubts begin.

I have purposely told this story in great detail because I really need an answer. I think I Love this girl..if there is such a thing. I am crazy about Her.

THIS IS WHERE IT STARTS TO FALL APART and I guess I fall with it.

At 3pm the same day that she left my house (Sunday) remember we hooked up at 9pm on Saturday nite…. I send her the following text and I do quote this word for word. I only do it BECAUSE we had Sex and she seemed so damn into Me. Otherwise I would have waited several days.

1st UN-responded to Text: “ Hi Sweetie  just wanted to tell you I had a wonderful time last nite. Hope you made it to church ok and had a good time with your mom. Sorry to keep you out so late but I totally lost track of time”

I get NO response but chalk it up to her sleeping maybe after having to get up early for church after being out all damn nite.

At 9pm I make the ONLY phone call that I have made and break down and call her. IT rings and goes to voicemail. I leave NO message.

By 10pm I am getting really nervous but still very hopeful…now I about to send text text number 2.I think of some excuse and because we drank most of the nite and she lives not Far from me I text her this exactly:
2nd UN-responded to Text : “ Shawna, you ok? You left after you had been drinking all nite and I just a little worried … I know you live close but you never responded to my text earlier…so let me know you are ok….if you are getting this”

At the time I thought this seemed like a clever un-threatening way to approach her again.

The text goes and I Never get a response..now my HIGH is rapidly becoming a very big Low. This is the part where I HATE that I cannot shut off my brain and heart and listen to what I know I need to do …which is most likely nothing for a few days.

I only make it till the next morning around 11am . I send Text number 3 and I am secretly in FULL panic mode. I am really tripping that she is not responding. How can this fucking happen to me? This goes thru my head over and over and over and over.

3rd Un_Responded to Text : “ Hey  ..you up yet?”

I get nothing,,,,,still no response of any kind.

Now my Brain really starts to ponder all kinds of fucked up shit, I absolutely cannot believe she is pulling this bullshit on me. I cannot go to work, its Monday by the way.
I am so fucked in the head, I cant think of anything else. It becomes one of the worst days of my life….EVER.

I make it thru this Torture chamber of a day till about 5pm before I feel I about to fucking lose my fucking sanity. This is the truth…its is driving me fucking NUTS.

Now comes Text Number 4.

This is where I make the Big BLUNDER among Blunders and let her know Exactly how I am feeling. This is one text I wish I could take back. But it is done and I cannot.
I did it in the heat of the moment…out of sheer frustration.

4th Un-Responded to Text : “ Shawna, is there something wrong? You can be honest with me…I think we owe each other at least that much. I am very confused. I like you a lot, more than I can easily put into words.I thought we had a great time,,,Maybe it was just me ,, but it really saddens me that you give me no response whatsoever…I am lost on this one. I thought you were very special. Saturday nite was one of the best nites of my life. Please tell me what is up. Its just so weird we have sex and you seemed to be so into everything,,, and now you wont even respond to me at all. I am so lost right now. Not knowing anything is the worst of all. Tell me what is wrong…Please. I am really hurting over you.”

Ok..i know , I know , I know….fuck, fuck , fuck….but I did it ..and I meant it, and I told her EXACTLY how I was actually feeling at the time. I just literally freaked out and sent it.

At this point I call a good friend of mine who is very good with women. He talks sense to me and tells me to man up and quit fucking with her and just wait it out for awhile. I decide he is definitely right. This is late Monday nite Nov.19th.

Now I make it almost a whole 3 days, but since its Thanksgiving I decide to at least tell her to have a good holiday.

I text Her text message number 5..it is a simple sweet one. This one is at 1230 pm on thanksgiving day.

5th Un-responded to Text: “ Happy Thanksgiving Shawna  hope it’s a good one”

No response of course of ANY kind.

We are ALMOST to the end here folks by the way.
I make it another 3 days until Sunday Nov.25th one week from when she left and cant take it anymore AGAIN. The Time is about 1pm.

Now I send text number 6. It is meant to be Short and Sweet as well.

6th Un-Responded to Text: “ Heard a song today and thought of You”

No Response whatsoever.

This really really is eating me up from the inside out by this point, I am in serious pain and a horrible depression. Like I said, I was tripping on this girl. She was like my dream girl.


I make it until about 9pm the same day Sunday Nov.25th and send just a song to her in a voice memo. It’s a goo goo dolls song that I know she loves and that I also sang to her in Person when she was at my house.

7th Un-Responded to text : its just the goo goo dolls song..no words

No response.

Now I make it one more hour and think…fuck, I have already sent two , might as well send 3 today and than I will have to leave her Totally alone for quite a long time and hope for the best.

This is my LAST text to here at 10pm on Sunday Nov.25th which was yesterday.

8th Un-Responded to text and I quote: “ I just want You to know you can always talk to me Shawna…..I know we moved along very fast, but like shit happens, and 9 months is a long time ….just as 3 months was for me…..You are the only person who has made my heart pound in years. I will Never forget how Beautiful you looked when I first saw you when you got out of your car. They broke the mold when they made You…and I hope this is not because you feel awkward or anything now. I am not mad, only sad. I have No desire to bug you ….just wish you would communicate with me. I am easy to talk to. I guess I just wish I had a reason you are acting this way towards me. I am not trying to jump into a relationship with you or anything, but when people do what we did, it does cause stronger feelings than normal. I hope you will cut me some slack and at least talk to me.”

WHEW…that was the last one guys and yea I know…its really bad, I guess its also really needy. I have never hardly been so disturbed about a girl before. Its been the worst week of my life . 7 days of Pure fucking hell.

This is where it all stands….i am crazy about Her and I want to somehow fix what I have done. I don’t know how to do it. One thing I am going to do is WAIT a considerable amount of time, like 2 weeks I guess before sending anything else.

IF ANYONE CAN HELP ME I WOULD SURE APPRECIATE ANYTHING YOU CAN GIVE ME BASED ON THE FULL STORY I HAVE GIVEN HERE.

I want to Marry this girl.

As you can see, I cannot figure out for the life of me…what the fuck happened ? and what is going on in her pretty little head?
It has really really fucked me up.

Any theories or any suggestions like I say would be very much appreciated.

Thanks again

Todd