Excellent advice, thanks again! It makes perfect sense.

Just wanted to post a brief update. I'm not particularly asking for advice at this point since I know when to fold and walk, and that time is now. I just think it might be mildly entertaining for some people.

So last week, she wanted to go to a bar with me. We went out and she was flirting like crazy. Touching me everywhere, etc. After a few beers I thought it would be a good idea to grab her hand and put it on my dick and she just smiled and rubbed it a little. She started to drink more heavily and finally announced "I'm so drunk right now, you could do absolutely anything you wanted to me". She repeated this like 10 times. I am REALLY against cheating (it's my #1 most hated thing in life, period), and on that same token I am unwilling to allow someone to cheat with me as well. Therefore, I refused to have sex with her. She invited me to her apartment so I went in and we talked for a bit. She asked me to lay down in bed and watch a movie with her. She knows how much I fucking despise cheating. I gave her a kiss on the cheek and left.

A few days later, we went to see a movie. She deemed it necessary to hold my hand the entire time and rested her head on my shoulder. All of our friends kept asking if we're dating again and I said no. One of my friends even got pissed because he thought I was lying and keeping it from him for no reason. That's how blatant it is.

And then, last night happened. One of her female friends was "having a bad night" and asked me to go out for a drink alone. After this friend was substantially drunk, I decided to probe her with some questions about the situation between my ex and I. She said that my ex's current relationship isn't working out at all, so her friend asked how much longer it'll be until she's with me since we seem to be practically together already. My ex said "Oh, Snarg? No, I don't think so. There's this guy at work who I'm interested in."

Well damn. Just when I thought I had figured this shit out, the ultimate curve ball blasts me in the face.

Well at least you have your answer. Attention, and wanting what they can't have... cornerstones of this sort of thing yeah? It sounds like she just wants you around to stroke her ego. The reason I say this is because I'm pretty sure my ex is doing the same thing right now to me as well. My ex is the kind of girl that maintains a "friendship" with her old lovers to keep her ego stoked, and when she meets a new guy (like when she met me) gives him all kinds of attention/interest to get him going. Once she's "got him", she'll back down and keep contact minimal while she finds a new fix. She's even used the phrase "snap my fingers and get what I want" when talking about her "friends" to me.

Some women are just like this. Maybe your ex isn't as bad as mine, but it sounds like with what her friend said it's possible.

Snarg dont take the wrong way... but you give too much attention to this girl.

Besides ... why center on what she say .... dont know you girls'?

Never believe in what a girl say... because to be honest girls dont know what they want..

Actions> words...

Remember girls deceive even them! So.... why believe in her

_________________
Oh! You've gotta be kidding me!

I agree. I realized that I need to kick her to the curb so I finally cut contact as much as our school/work schedules permit.

Some girls just don't like being alone. Maybe the attention, text messages, phone calls, occasional visits and [most likely] bad sex is just until she either completely can't stand him, finds someone else, or hooks up with you.

A friend of mine has this situation and told me "I dont want to be alone." I tried to convince her to make friends, go out with girls (actually, I wanted her to find a "single girls meetup group that I could infiltrate, mwuhahahaha), find a meetup group, or whatever, but she stayed in a relationship she wasn't content with.

I know you said she toned down the jealousy, but if you decide to pursue a relationship again, make sure to address this and knowing when to say "ok, this isn't working" if you do go down that road again. With my ex, it took me an extra couple of months of this [before putting my foot down and saying that's enough] and it left me pretty jaded.

and I would just ask her directly. It's tough with an ex in the same social circle, and I find that addressing her directly would make life simpler for everyone the two of you and the rest of the group.

curious how this situation has panned out.

cheers

DB

I pretty much stopped caring about her, and subsequently stopped agreeing to meet up with her and stuff. This drove her crazy and she kept asking what was wrong with me. I genuinely didn't know what to tell her, since I wasn't purposely trying to blow her off or anything. It's just that I didn't care at all anymore. She nagged and nagged until I finally told her I knew about everything with the other guy. I said that I realize I was misled by her constant flirting, and I'm glad I know what's going on now and that everything is resolved. She apologized like 100 times and that's about it.