When i walk into a room and see an attractive girl i usually do one of two things. One i go over and talk to her or two I start to over think which makes me worry about what she thinks of me and I end up not even talking to her. Even when she's giving me signals I cant seem to get over the mental hump to talk to her. Once i get talking to her im fine. Anybody have some tips on how to get over the rejection period? And i know I need to just not care what anybody thinks but any excercises to make it easier?

You are doing it wrong. you need to first get some sort or response from her before you approach.

what i do is walk directly towards them like i am going to talk to them. I am not looking at them, nor am i smiling - just completely expressionless as I walk right towards them like I am going to open them...and then I veer off at the last second.

This is how I work a room before I ever approach. Within a few minutes i automatically know who is interested and who is not.

You can do this in public quite easily. Once you walk by keep them in your periphereal vision to see if they look up at you once you walk by. If they do, you're in. If I do this a couple times where I catch a girl looking up at me she will be dying for me to approach her haah. Oh yeah and if it is a social scene with a lot of people you can also lightly touch girls and then when they turn around or whatever keep walking on.

The idea is that you want to enter their world and get some sort of reaction from them before you do the approach. Then, when you approach it's EASY

Hi,
while i do like the rest of the response (looking at it objectively, it might be a good trick to start out with), i think this sentence is plain bullshit. this is my personal view though.

I find that a keypoint in pickup is facing your fears. Pickup is also about changing yourself to become a more attractive person, to be become a real man, to grow a pair. Keep hiding behind tricks solely to not have to face rejection at approach will not help you any further in the long run.

One of the best advices i ever read was one by Juggler, it went almost like this:
the more you open yourself to women to be gunned down, the lesser the chance that they will actually gun you down.

cheers and good luck

_________________
"Stop being a fucking vagina and escalate" - CaptainJackHarkness

Like the naked leads the blind.
I know I'm selfish, I'm unkind.
Sucker love I always find,
Someone to bruise and leave behind.
placebo - every me, every you

*sigh* the point of pick up is to get laid (for me anyways). Dutchstyles99 if you want to get laid follow my advice. what I'm doing is seduction.

besides, when I pick up I am never afraid. i used to be, but that was because i was doing it like an idiot (aka what LD is doing/recommending)

LD don't let me hurt your feelings. you simply don't know. i was in your shoes not long ago. as someone who actually gets laid i am telling you how it is.

ALWAYS DO A PRE-APPROACH. all the best do it

The only exception is if they are walking by in the daytime and you don't have time to get into their world. I made this very mistake yesterday. I should have went in to an approach cold turkey but I assumed I had more time. oh well...different seductions for different girls. I have been kicking myself for the past 24 hours about this actually. she was so hot but she was brown bagging it so i should have realized that she was not feeling sexy and my pre-approach wouldn't slow her down. ohh well live and learn. the time for a cold - turkey approach is pretty rare compared to a pre-approach. maybe 1 to 5 ratio that you will have to go in cold. in any sort of social scene (nightclub, party) always do a pre-approach.

Here is another example of a pre-approach: I will walk up to a girl and introduce myself saying how she is so beautiful i just couldn't help myself and then after a minute or two i will walk away after heavy flirting, touching, introduction. When i see her again later in the club we are already friends because I have done my pre-approach. If the pre-approach goes cold I know that she is not interested and besides who cares i have only wasted a minute or two.

If you don't want to waste your time then why not escalate quickly on the initial approach? I dont want to hurt anyones feeling either but your angle seems very chumpy, it leaves too much to chance Between the time of your "pre-approach" and your later approach I could have opened, gone though the stages and be taking her home.

_________________
"Lets get out of here..."

If you want to get laid listen to jctennis, I mean this pre-approach shit sounds so good. Holy fuck!! We gotta look for iois and shit and make sure she looks at me when I walk by!! I'm such a pussy to actually approach that I have to pre-approach. Omgosh thank you for enlightening my world.

Okay and you guys are all off-topic as fuck, he's not asking HOW to approach, he's asking why he second guesses himself and why he chickens out.

Dutchstyle... GET RID OF YOUR FUCKING EGO. Your ego wants you to be liked by others, wants you to be cool. The risk of getting blown out means you're not cool.

Stop.

Who gives a fuck about what people think about you.

You only need yourself to be amused, and people should be REACTING TO YOU.

Most likely you'll never see a certain girl again. Why not go talk to her? Hmm?? Is your ego getting the best of ya because you're afraid she won't like you?

Destroy your fucking ego and you'll approach like a boss.

When I was second guessing, I just started developing a mindset of "Ya know what, who gives a fuck, I don't care."

And bam approach approach approach, makeouts, lays, numbers, etc.

You might find this article helpful

http://www.authenticpua.com/dating-arti ... explained/

_________________
The natural "Steve" who trained Richard La Ruina (Gambler)

http://www.authenticpua.com/primal-seduction/

stop fighting you guys. seriously.

You can escalate on the initial approach but it does not feel as serendipitous/natural. My goal is to seduce women as quickly as possible. Not to escalate as quickly as possible. Not to get the number as quickly as possible.

If you want to pull girls you need to do a fucking pre-approach - anything even if it is just making eye contact and winking/smiling. I do this to figure out who is even open to being approached.

When you do the pre-approach correctly you're not going to worry about the actual approach because you will know who automatically if she is interested in you.

Now everyone stops fighting and just listen to me because I am right and I get laid.

Oh yeah and if you're wondering Body Language - I pulled a girl in 30 minutes only five days ago (tuesday). Granted I was on a vacation and had perfect logistics and yes it was my fastest pull EVER but the fact is what I do works and you can close quickly. You really can't pull a girl in 30 minutes 99.99% of the time but, i repeat, i was on a CRUISE and she had came by herself. And my cabin was a 5 minute walk away. Perfect logistics. But anyways I did a pre-approach.

I love women and I love to fuck them.

[quote="VietnameseProdigy"]"Dutchstyle... GET RID OF YOUR FUCKING EGO. Your ego wants you to be liked by others, wants you to be cool. The risk of getting blown out means you're not cool. "

Definately usefull Vietnamesse Prodigy. That would make a lot of since becaus eive always been a very prideful person. Ive always had an ego and id never thought of it as a sticking point all in itself. I think im going to something Style has suggested and just go out to get rejected. By the time im done ill have been rejected so many times that ego wont even come into play and i wont care about her rejaction anymore

i am not going into that
Lol, rest assure, you cant hurt my feelings .
I am not even going to take the effort to respond to this rubbish either.
Your pre-approach is actually a normal approach but it seems like you walk away. That is all smiles and sunshine. But this stands directly opposed to what you first said: before you appraoch, you need some sort of response from her. You said that, but apparently you dont live your own advice.

furthermore, you fail to explain more what you mean with the responses that you NEED to get before approaching. Mate, please reread your own posts before you try to teach something to somebody. People read the things on this board, and it aint getting any easier if you contradict yourself or fail to explain precisely what you mean. I dont mean any offence, but if you would follow up your own advice so far, you are in trouble already.
This is not making any sense. a pre approach is not going in 'cold turkey'? Then how do you approach? make eye contact for hours before you go? The OP, dutchstyles, has a problem: if he doesnt go in instantly, he tends to overthink stuff and fear is getting him.

Advising him to watch for cues to go in, has very high chance of resulting in the following: "was that a sign to approach? can i approach safely now? I am not sure..." this is making it worse, a lot worse. The thing that needs to be dealt with is the anxiety. You cant ever get rid of it, it will always be there. But you cant let it stop you from doing it.

I have had the same problem. When i started out, sometimes i was in the mood and all was good, and other times, i felt like there was pressure, and i didnt had to guts to appraoch. The way i got over it was going making a click in my head. The moment that i knew from myself that i was scared or paralyzed to go over there, i forced myself to go in anyway. and i thought: "no pain, no gain." Its from the screw ups that you learn the most.

IMO, there is no trick to get over that phase. You need to realize it yourself and make the effort yourself to do something at that very moment.
And this is exactly the contradiction: you walk up to a girl... doing your pre approach which is actually a regular cold approach. Did you do something before this pre approach (perhaps it would be valuable to share that because that is the original question?)? Because if the guy is having trouble walking up to her (even if she is giving signals like you vaguely imply), then how is this advice of any value to him?

You act as if this pre-approach is the silver bullet. It is not, there is no silver bullet. I admit, it is a good idea to approach before you go into the nightclub. But this is not what he is asking. I think he should be able to talk to girls that he didnt meet before walking into the room.

So to DutchStyles: sorry for hijacking the thread a bit, but i hate it when people show off hiding on the internet and not actually give valuable advice. so my advice to you: realizing is halfway there. Now you just need to get yourself to do something, anything and not be afraid of screwing up. No pain, no gain.

PS:
I feel it as my responsibility to point out crap which is not helpful at all, hence this last piece .
And i think that the most of all, you love your own writing .

_________________
"Stop being a fucking vagina and escalate" - CaptainJackHarkness

Like the naked leads the blind.
I know I'm selfish, I'm unkind.
Sucker love I always find,
Someone to bruise and leave behind.
placebo - every me, every you

This is great advice and only strengthens my point. One can easily open up every woman in an entire room within minutes with micro approaches ( pre-approach).

It would take half the night doing it cold. Not to mention your depleting desire to continue if you are getting rejected a lot. There is a time and a place for all game but if you have the time, why not warm up the room.

_________________
Seduce their mind and the rest will follow.