Is anyone else hacked off at being the tea boy at work, constantly on the guard needing to be either aggressive or on the attack just to avoid being the brunt of all jokes?

There are times at work, unfortunately very rarely perhaps once a year, where I get a 5-10 mins chance to actually take the lead on something. I'll be standing in control of 30 people and a multi million pound boat telling people what do to. That's not the hard bit.

The hard bit is somehow the doubt gets into my mind. I start thinking "This isn't me". This is just because I haven't had much experience of this really. I just need a chance to give it a go! The other aspect is that if other people have been bossing you around people then make it harder to take you seriously. Unfortunately my position has no beta below me... pisses me off. It becomes all about the alpha and nothing about whoever is the best person for the job. It's less of a problem if I'm dominant from the start, but that doesn't happen at work as there tends to be a chicken and egg situation:

- no promotion because you're not dominant enough,
- not dominant because you're not promoted enough

I think if I was put into a position of responsibility I'd grow into it. That sort of thing happens at McDonalds but not in my field regrettably. Unfortunately I've looked at what that would take and it would mean a years extra training and a whole load of grief (though I have been negotiating with a company for on the job training.. working on it...)

How to get more dominant in a lowly job? I don't like losing my rag. But if I do that usually sorts the problem. But it shouldn't need to get to that stage. I usually grate the most with ex military types. I must be envious of the leadership training that appears to have no analog on civvy street. Or is there?

Martial Arts, public speaking, laying a hot girl. All helps.
Got any more?

I can tell I'm not the only one to get frustrated by the lack of "career progression" (aka tired of being the lowest shit at work). Technically I'm like a consultant but the hidden gripe is that I have to assist others if they ask...

I can see now why people have problem when been a while at a place and not in control of anyone else. Personally I couldn't care less but now I realise that others will attempt to abuse those who they feel are below them always. As such I'd really like to quit. The strange thing is that it's otherwise a great job where I basically get paid to do nothing, decent wage and allows me to travel... but you get to a point where women (for example) expect you to have been promoted and if you don't move on there's a feeling of immaturity.

But what do you do if there is no logical progression because every upper movement is a backwards step in happiness - i.e. sat in an office, hands off paper pushing.

With a bit of savings I'd take a risk with contract work, chill out for a bit and go with some business ideas for a while. I've no bills or debt at all but with £6k in the bank it doesn't seem right to jump ship when the money's rolling in... then again, tell me some inspirational story of folk who just jacked it in with debts and got some stories right?

Is this really want you want to do? Is this job where you see yourself working in 10 years time?

If yes then you need to work on your prowess at work. Just because your job description says people can tell you what to do that does not mean you can't instruct or "help" other people and that is the best way to get noticed and promoted. I have no idea what your job entails so I cant give an example but for me (Landscaper) I am now pretty much joint second in command at my place of work (only small company but still) because I picked up a trowel, hammer or whatever. Once I had done everything I needed to do I didn't sit back I worked on the skilled stuff.

Now if its not what you want to do then save up some more cash and take a risk, you cant be that old so it shouldn't ruin your life if it doesn't work out. Most people don't decide what they want to do until around 27 so relax. I am 24 and I know my current job, despite being good at it isn't what I want to do anymore, nor will it ever get me the money I want so for now I am sticking it out (somewhat resentfully) until I figure myself out.

Chill and move forward, hope this helps

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"Lets get out of here..."