So I've got a date with this girl tonight (from this thread: how-should-i-text-this-girl-she-may-thi ... highlight=)

For some reason, even though she's outside my usual type of girl (she's older than I am - she's 29, I am 27, I usually go for girls many years younger, because they're hotter), I am nervous. Possibly because I haven't really been on a date date in a few months (I've been trying to save money/work on projects that aren't girls).

We're meeting at the local Starbucks that we ran into each in (which is conveniently near her house, or maybe not so conveniently.)

I haven't figured out where I want to take her - out to dinner? To mini-golf or something silly? My car is also fairly shitty (mostly because I prefer to save money and not buy a new one).

I'm not even sure when I should arrive for the evening!

Went on the date, we did starbucks and dinner (mistake, should have done something I could KINO during).

Did not kiss at end of the night (I felt it wouldn't be natural - no build up).

We spent like 3-4 hours talking, she was sometimes laughing hysterically (laughing so hard she cried).

We seemed to have general good friendly chemistry, but it was difficult to take it to the next level.

My thoughts are suggesting drinks for next time - that should loosen us both up. I tried to physically escalate, but she seemed to not reciprocate. I should have been practicing more KINO on her though.

Not trying to be mean, but you did almost everything wrong here. You don't need alcohol. You dont' take them to Starbucks, nor should you ever do "coffee dates." Open them and open them at Starbucks sure, but don't return there for a date! Have her meet you somewhere for a date, then don't let her see your car. It will DLV you. She'll find out what you drive eventually, but you need to build attraction first, otherwise that will prevent attraction from building. Yes, you should've gotten a booth at a real restaurant and sat next to her to kino her. Or maybe go for a walk and do the same thing.

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“Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'!” ~Audrey Hepburn

I did a coffee date to build comfort, because I wasn't actually 100% sure it was a date beforehand.

I agree - I really was not sure what to suggest to her to do though - I suppose I could have suggested walking, but there was no real place to walk from where we were.

I completely agree that I mangled this entire encounter - I felt I should have done significantly better, but for some reason I was so damn nervous with her.

I THINK she'll give me another chance, because she liked my personality and we are, as far as I can tell, pretty compatible, but I definitely did not turn her on.

If you made her laugh then you turned her on. She had a good time and should be open to another meeting because of that. Do not hesitate to escalate next meeting or you may be LJBF before you know it.


Peace...

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Crypto...
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All girl's are Freaks...It is your job to bring it out in them! - Crypto

You need to stop bending over and letting her ass fuck your brain! - Heywood

Hrm, how soon should I be texting her after? She told me to find her on Facebook, I did, sent her a message saying I could indeed find her (but she almost never uses her computer).

I'm just caring too much on this one - part of me thinks I should just call it a wash - I care too much to win here.

text her an hour to 2 after saying it was nice meeting with her and have a good night


Lots of guys here will disagree but if they had any female friends they'd know it goes a LONG way in disarming them. Typically when the guy doesnt tell her that he enjoyed meeting with her they figure the guy is disinterested. This doesnt confer neediness at all because you're being very short and pleasant without lending anything more to the text, in fact it shows you're direct and enjoyed her company.

Messaged her on Facebook right after with a "haha, found you, despite your challenge!"

Haven't communicated since. Planning on sending a text either tonight or Friday. I am worried I conveyed neediness as I mentioned wanting to do another date at the end of the night.

Also, lol, mentioning to my female friend about this girl (that I actually like, rather than just wanting to fuck) and was nervous about, made her confess that she had feelings for me once, and that she liked me before I became a dick. I like her too, so we'll see how that goes. She denied liking me UNTIL I started hanging out with another girl I was considering dating dating. Girls are so funny.

More common than you think. She may not like you in sense of wanting to be with you, more so than her being jealous that another woman is spending time with you.

Well, she always gave off a vague vibe of interested.

She'd get pissed if I talked about other girls, got angry at me when I texted her drunk once that I liked her ("We should not be talking about something important like this when you're drunk!"), and just like, end of the world apocalyptic fights about me being a slut and only wanting slutty girls (she considers herself "classy" and sleeps with almost nobody).

She was always so crazy and super strong denial that I just continued banging other girls and meeting girls.

It's only when I met this one that I liked that she is acting different.

So we'll see.

I was trying to cut girls off for a bit for productivity (studying to take the GRE) but now that I'm taking it this Sunday, that's done. I also have a new apt within walking distance of a major bar scene, so I am making up for lost time.

well, texted her (girl I went on a date with) a few times, we made jokes back and forth, invited her out again, and then suddenly NO RESPONSE.

Nothing. For two days now (we were usually texting every day or other day)

Complete write-off or should I try to game again?

That's a general problem I have a hard time dealing with. What to do when it's "their turn" in a text based conversation and they don't reply.

.


Text her again, change subject, do not invite her in the first text you send, see if she repplies, if she does, then ask her out, do somenthing fun you enjoy, then she if she likes your comfort zone.

So the exchange should go as follows:


Me: Funny or witty comment

Her: Response

Me: Ask out

?

Or should I talk for a bit?

IMO some chit chat its nice, then you suggest that you will go to this place and its really fun, that she should check it out with you, that works for me.