Hi, I'm Kratos0909, I'm 19 years old and I've never kissed a girl.

I don't know why but I feel like I'm not using my full potential of picking up girls. I think I can get to the level of the PUA if I try really hard and get my mind made up. Eventhough I don't have lot of friends which are girls, the ones I have appreciatte and respect me and would probably never say that I have this problem with women.

This is mainly the reason why I'm starting out this journal.

Over the last 2 months I think I have matured a lot. I've read The Tao of Badass, 60 Years Of Challenge, studied some night club game from skills360 and youtube channel ClubDanceLessons.

I've read a book called Psycho-Cybernetics which really changed my perspective about everything.

Eventhough I was in the pickup for about 2-3 years, I've had 0 results and I blame it on my lack of motivation and balls. This time I'm not going to stop until I've reached my goal of being succesfull with women.

Usually I go out 1-2 times per moth, but that is going to change.
I've never done any day game, mostly only night game in the clubs.

So here you go, this journal is about some guy who is starting from absolute zero and is trying to get right on the top.

If you have any tips for me, feel free to share them.

Dont have any tips dude,but I wish you luck ghost of sparta

Last night I went out in a club with my friends.

Eventhough I'm 19 and I've never kissed a girl I was feeling very confident about myself going out that night. With all the material I read I had a feeling that nothing could stop me from closing tonight.

My goal was too get more comfortable with approaching and talking to girls and close some if I get the chance.

On the way to the club I had couple of funny interactions with some girls. Ill just write 1 here.

Group of girls are walking by
Me: What's up
Girls: What's up
*I just walk past them and I don't talk to them
1 girl: Why isn't he talking to us?
Me:( i turn around) oh sure I'll talk to you. whats up?

The girl starts talking about some random shit how she got drunk and puked 10 min ago, but that its ok because she has gum. LOL I'm laughing really hard

Me: Well, guess who I'm not approaching tonight. *big smile*

The whole group laughs, we talk little bit more and I go catch up my friends who were in front of me.

I come in the club with my friends (6 of them) and the club is packed. People are literally dancing on each other. Music is really loud, girls are sexy and everyone is having fun.

After all of the time I invested in reading all kinds of material, I found myself in the same position like every other night. My AA(Approach Anxiety) was killing me. I was frozen and I couldn't do shit. I think I catched 1 or 2 eye-contacts, but I have a bad sight and I was full of shit with all the excuses I was making up and I approached none of them.
I was just dancing in the club without approaching anyone for 2-3 hours and since my friends aren't good at night club (except of one, and he was in a bad mood all night), they didn't really make some comments about it except some excuses like : "Ummm, I haven't drink enough", "Ummm, she isn't looking at me"," Umm, I'm retarded"

Whatever... I then walked out of the club to get some fresh air and said that I am approaching when I come in and that I don't give a fuck.

Sixty Years Of Challenge says that to get rid of your AA, you have to approach to purposelly get blown out. This has allways worked for me, but that first approach is hard as fuck.

I see some beautiful chick, HB9 and friends say : "dude shes, yours"

I approach as soon as possible without much thinking so I don't pussy out and I approach her from the back (fuck it ) and start grinding. She turns around, I look at her and after a second I smile without saying a word and we continue dancing. While we were dancing, I was like: "holy shit i couldnt belive this worked" I wanted to turn her so we were face to face so I can use some dance moves I learned from skills360 and ClubDanceLessons.

Some friend of hers comes and starts saying how her friends is lost. HB9 turns back to me while still dancing. Her friend starts saying all kinds of shit and says something like: "i dunno, hes nothing special, say him to go fuck off"
HB9 turns around, waves her hand, I say: "Ok" and leave

Bad thing is that I think I could've done something with her if the friends didn't appear. Good thing is that my AA was completely gone and I could approach ALL OF DEM BITCHEZ.

After that I approached an HB8 from the front while dancing and saying "lets dance", but she just waved her hand and said "no". (i think this is the right way to approach) My friends laugh, but I dont really care.

Then I approached another girl with really pretty face (HB8), she ignored me and left. I started to dance with my friends (who were approaching noone, AGENT FUCKING 0) and I notice that the HB8 that ignored me 5 min ago came back with her friend(ugly face, greaaaat ass) and they both started to dance in the circle where me and my friends were dancing. I approach the HB8 again and she again just ignores me and goes away. ( I noticed her friend was checking me out but I wasn't really into her)

After about 5-10 minutes of me dancing HB8 comes to dance near me AGAIN and I approach again saying something like: "You're cute, let's dance". Again rejected, completely ignored.

That kinda hurt me so I approached another girl, again rejected and left the club because my friends were leaving.

Eventhough I got rejected lots of times, I still think this is a huge leap for me. I'm finally moving forward, instead of staying home and doing nothing or going to the club and not approaching at all.

This is a huge post and I tried to be as detailed as possible.

Any advices on what I could've done differently or how to improve my game more will be appreciated.

This is all constructive criticism, so please don't take anything personally; this is a learning process just like any other skill (i.e. basketball, swimming, tennis, etc.).

I think the reason you're AA is freaking you out from not approaching is because you're WAY too outcome dependent right now. If you haven't kissed a girl, and probably haven't approached much, why be concerned about closing on your first night out??? That shouldn't be your mindset coming in to a fun environment; that takes the fun out of the night because you are expecting something and girls will feel the neediness coming behind that (they are very intuitive). I have definitely been where you are a COUNTLESS number of times, so coming from experience, you're looking at it the wrong way, as I once did...

Don't look at the night as a night of pickup; just look at it as a night of going out with your friends and meeting (or fucking with) great new people! Don't be concerned about who you approach or what they'll say, just be genuinely interested in the people you meet and amuse yourself first!

The reason you are so nervous about approaching is because you might not have any social momentum before getting in to the club. Here's some things I do to pump my state and get me in that energetic, invincible mode; you'll know you're in it when you feel it:

-Before you get into the club, try and hug a girl for 10 seconds! It'll be fucking hilarious to the rest of your friends to put this girl that you don't know AT ALL in this awkward situation where she's hugging a total stranger, and it will give you a baseline that you're not going to die from approaching people. And don't half-ass hug her either, like HUG her. I sometimes just mess with them by starting to fake cry about 5 seconds in and trembling as if I were REALLY crying. Or I just talk to them and have a normal conversation while I'm hugging them like "Hi" "How are you doing?" "You just looked cold, so I figured I'd say hi in the most overt way possible"; it really doesn't matter what you say, as long as you have a non-threatening body language before your hug (palms facing her, standing up straight, looking at her or obviously/blatantly/jokingly looking down at the floor with your arms stretched out). I usually do the hug thing to a girl who's walking away from the club and towards my group of friends, right before we get into the club. You might even start talking to her after the hug or she'll awkwardly run away. Either way, mission accomplished, it was for your own amusement, not for her. It was to make you and your friends laugh and start the night off in a fun direction.

-When you get into a packed club, start high fiving people. ANYBODY, guy or girl, high five them. Just look at them and stick your hand up, the people you're looking at will do the rest. If someone looks at you funny, just turn to someone else and say "High five!". Don't do this for too long cause then you'll just look weird. Just high five people while you're making your way to the bar. Now, when or if you see a girl who's particularly in to the high five thing you can approach her about the high five. What I usually do right after I high five her is I say "You're really good at high fiving! But do you wanna know a little secret? If you look at my elbow, you get the perfect high five every time!" and that shit actually works too! Now, just start at her elbow and she'll stare at yours and high five her about 5 more times in a row in a fun/funny way (all keeping up this high energy, fun vibe). Now after this I usually say "You know what? You're pretty fun, we should have a secret handshake!" and make up a handshake with her (you should just think of a pre-planned handshake) that ends in a thumb wrestling match (like, where your hands are hooked in a style as if you are ready to thumb wrestle, and GO AT ANY LENGTH TO BEAT HER AT THUMB WRESTLING EVEN IF YOU CHEAT! When you win just say "YES! WINNER! I AM SO AWESOME! WINNERR!" shit like that (I am going off on so many tangents, but I can't believe I'm SPAM my high energy shit). If she doesn't ask for your name at that point, just say "Alright, now we're going to be real. What's your name?" and then do a little deep cold read about something you noticed on her. Ask her chodey questions (Where are you from?) and tease her about her answer ("Wisconsin?! Me too!!!" "Really???" "...No..."). You'll be in comfort by then. If you don't feel like doing that, you don't have too, but it still puts you in a good mood when you're walking towards the bar, but make sure you approach a set by the time you get to the bar (all with the mindset of just fucking with people).

-While you're walking through the club, party boy dance on a dude (preferably smaller than you) for a half a second and just keep walking right after

-If girls are walking in a single file line to get around/through your group, get behind them and start acting like it's a conga line

I think the main thing to do man is JUST HAVE FUN. Fuck with people; you're never going to see them again. When you're having fun, girls will want to be a part of the party, and you'll be doing them a favor by opening them. It'll make their night that much more fun.

P.S. What is your definition of getting "rejected"? If she ignores you, that isn't necessarily rejection. I usually push it until she says "Seriously, get the hell away". Hahaha, you'll tend to learn some things along the way about rejection, or if not, you'll have a funny ass story with your friends instead of 2-3 hours standing around in a circle looking around (I've been there too, don't worry). By "pushing it", I mean I'd say shit like "hey! I love you baby, this isn't over! I only cheated on you once!" or "I'm sorry, I just DON'T wanna have sex with you tonight!" (In a loud voice so other people could hear, with a smirk on your face of course). If she turns around cause she's pissed that you said something, boom; you got her attention. Figure out what to do with it after that! But you'd have gotten past your AA and successfully have more/new problems to deal with! But love every problem, and have fun with them.

That's how you learn

Hope this helped and good luck,

EQ

Thank you for your advices EQ. I can see you really put some time in writing this so I am really thankful.

I have to say I love your advices. The high five thingy sounds really awesome and fun. Im gonna definitely use that next time I'm out.

But the advice with hugging girl for 10 seconds sounds kinda scary too me. Haha, I don't know but I feel like she isn't going to react that good to some stranger hugging her out of nowhere and I don't really like to scare girls like that.

I think you are right about my mentality and I'm going to try to change it. I had a feeling like I wanted to prove something to my friends ( eventhough they don't know I never kissed a girl). I shouldn't have gone to the club with the mentality like that eventhough I had some funny interactions on the way to there.
But you are right, couple of times before I could've closed a girl, but because of this mentality I allways played it safe and whenever I had the chance to do it I would freeze.

I don't know why, but I've allways had AA and only after I've read 60 Years Of Challenge's book I found the solution how to remove it. I just have to force myself do 1 approach as soon as possible, get rejected and then I realize how stupid my fear of approaching was and how it's all a one big joke.

Rejections never bother me. Lot of times I laugh when girls reject me, because the shit they make up is funny to me.
That girl I approached 3 times had sooo fuckin beautiful face and I just had to approach her every time she was near me. I think her friend liked me so thats why she kept coming back. I really really tried to push it, but hey haha, I wish I used some lines you wrote here for me (eg. "hey! I love you baby, this isn't over! I only cheated on you once!") Haha thats fucking amazing.

Anyway, thanks for the advices. I'm gonna try to use them as much as possible next time I go out. Peace!

Kudos Kratos that was an awesome night for someone starting out. Theres always going to be rejections but the most important thing is that you kept working at it.

success comes from effort and you showed that you put in the work. Dont worry too much if your friends laugh or whatever other people think.

For advice, I think EQ's advice is spot on and great techniques for the night club setting too (im going to try some of that myself) I would add that before the night out do some day/afternoon gaming to warm up. Even if you get rejected it doesnt matter cos you are going to be in the "i dont really give a fk" mindset for later on in the night.

Play back some of the approaches in your head to see what worked and what didnt - then adjust your approaches accordingly.

Keep at it man, it does gets easier/better with more practice. Eventually the butterflies in the stomach find formation and fly together

thanks for all the support man
I think I'm gonna really have to make myself try really hard to approach at day. The reason is because I've never done it and it kinda scares me haha...
It's something that I will eventually had to do, but I think that I first have to get comfortable with night game.

This jorunal is really great because it motivates me to try my best every time I go out. Support and advices are really awesome to hear too

No worries man, we were all there at one point. The important thing to remember is that its a work in progress, so dont get down about it.

For the day game, when you are first starting out, the AA is intense for sure. Go into it with the mindset that you are looking to make friends and/or to just be friendly. The object is to just be comfortable making conversation with strangers.

I would say good morning/good afternoon to everyone I see (men/women/old ppl etc). Simple enough right?

Once youve expanded your comfort zone and feel better about it, add a comment/question - "Can you believe this weather? Do you have the time? Where is the closest......?" You get the idea. Its all baby steps, and slowly expand from there.

The whole point of it is to loosen up your approach muscles for when it counts.

For the first week give yourself a workable target of 10 ppl a day and then eventually when you feel like its too easy, keep upping it. Eventually if you will get to 10 number closes an hour! (Can you imagine your confidence level going into the night game with 10#s already in your back pocket?!)

Itll all come in time, just work on making each day better than the day before and you will get there.

Ok, so tonight I went out in a night club. Again loud club and I was drunk as fuck(im still drunk : ))) )

Basically I didn't waste any time on my AA, I just told my friend to push me to the nearest girl so I can break it. I approached her and she said that she was old enough to be my mother . I kinda messed around with her and then she told me to go mess around with other girls in the club. She said there are plenty of girls for me.

Basically I was approaching a lot without any result. Not even a one dance... ( maybe one dance , but it doesnt count. friend told some girl it was my birthday so she just danced with me and grabbed my ass. Kinda retarded because she left instantly)
Only thing worth mentioning was chatting with some chick that had same taste in music as me, but soon she left.

I was kinda fucked up. I couldnt talk at all because of alcohol. First time it happened to me. Only thing I could do was approach while dancing and that didn't work at all.

My self confidence kinda dropped tbh. I allways considered myself to be above average in looks and some girls I was approaching were certainly not.

I just don't understand how I was able to dance with almost perfect chick HB 9 on saturday and I couldn't dance with HB 5 tonight. Kinda retarded. I know that 60 said I should escalate, but how can I do it if every girl I approach while dancing just says no.
Night club game doesn't make any sense to me anymore.......

Today I was thinking about lot of the stuff and I decided I was going to stop masturbating, watching porn and smoke weed.

I've read an article on this page: http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthrea ... 133&page=1 ,which explains why I'm doing this.

Also, the journal by 23 year old guy that goes through this process was really inspiring. I hope I can get the same results or even more out of this.
You can read his journal here: http://yourbrainonporn.com/age-23-metam ... ick-magnet

You'll be hearing from me soon

I listen to rap and 16 years ago, on this day, Tupac supposedly "died". So yea, last night I was really fucking drunk. This time, I really didn't want to make myself feel bad from having AA. I only wanted to have fun and listen to some Tupac. (club owner said he was gonna play Tupac alot)

So this was my mindset before entering club. I only wanted to listen to some rap/hip hop and dance my ass off. One girl kept eye-balling me entire night. She was HB 6,5-7 and my friend told me he made out with her before and that I don't approach her. I said sure no problem.

I was in the club for 1 hour and I haven't made a single approach. I was just enjoying rap/hip hop so much, so I just danced and had fun. Suddendly I said fuck it, lets approach. My friends were allready warmed up.
I found myself surrounded by groups of ladies.
Front: 1 group of 2
Left: 2-3 groups of 2
Right: 1 group of 6
Back: 2 groups of 2

I approached girl from front, HB8,5. Instant rejection.(I kept looking at her and she never looked at me so that was expected). Then I approached girl from right HB9. Not much succes either. Then I looked at a girl from left (HB7,5), she looked at me I noded and smiled. She smiled too and looked away. That was all I need to know. But I was too hesitant. For some reason I didn't approach right away. I waited for her second glance at me. So she tried to go somewhere else(probably bathroom), I stopped her and said something like "no dont go, lets dance". She smiled and gestured "one moment".

Whatever, my fault. I don't really care, next time I won't make the same mistake. After that I approached some wild ass chick HB8,5 and started to dance with her. That girl was fucking crazy. Full of energy. She instantly started to grind. Then her friend said to me: " hey hey, thats my friend *smile" and pulled her away from me. I approached her again after 10 seconds and started to dance again while playfully smiling at her friend. HB8,5 then bit me on the neck. I smiled and proceeded to dance. Her friend then pulled her away and dragged her somewhere else. I didn't follow her.
So I made 2 mistakes there. I should've followed her and should've kissed her on the neck or make out with her when she bit me. It's just that things escalated so quickly, like literally 20-30 seconds.

HB7,5 then returns from bathroom. I come to her and grab her palm so I can lead her to dance with me. She doesn't follow my lead and raises her hand I grabbed. I was actually kinda surprised so I just looked at her. She looks at me and then at her friend for couple of times. She says to her friend: "No!" (indicating she doesn't like me) I fucking burst out laughing, because shit makes no sense. Then I start dancing and turn around from her.

In my mind all I was thinking what a big bullshiter that girl is haha. Whatever.
After that, club became chaotic. People started fighting, bouncers were carrying people around the club and throwing them out. I have nose for fights. I can sense them before they happen so everytime I thought they were gonna happen I just moved nearby girls from that place.

Night ended for me right there, no more approaches or anything. I lost energy and went home with my friends.

This is my eighth day of not masturbating btw. I don't feel any different though I noticed some women looking at me while I was in the bus. But it isn't anything special. One kept glancing at me while I was in the waiting room, waiting for my friend to go out of hospital, but she was really not my type (HB6). I didn't have that big of an AA in the club but I'm not sure if that has anything to do with me not masturbating.

Anyway, like always I would appreciate any adivces and tips on what I should've done differently. I tried to be as detailed as possible. Peace

EDIT: Actually I feel different about this no masturbating thing. Just now I realized how much more I notice little details on women. Like every detail of them. I realized that each of them is beautiful in their own way. It's kinda crazy... I've never looked at women this way before. In the morning I almost masturbated, but I'm very glad I didn't.

Dear Kratos, congrats on taking the courage and going out there to improve!

Some observations:

1. Regarding your mistakes regarding HB8,5. Yes, you should have kino-escalated when the girl bit you but you shouldn't have followed her. If she goes away, you don't follow, you just go along as everything is OK and act like it doesn't matter you as you can have fun without her (and perhaps you can even actually have fun!)

If you follow her, what will happen is that you will demonstate that you need her to have fun, and that's just losing value.

2. It seems to me that you mostly go to club where it's all dance. That's fine if you are into that sort of thing, but don't you think it will leave you a bit handicapped when you have to approach games talking and stuff? Perhaps you don't have so much problem with conversation so it isn't a problem but I'm just throwing it out there.

Dance game I feel is much less theoretical than any other kind of game, so it all comes down to practicing more. Though the same principles apply: You want to be leading and you want to be confident.

3. I think you should stop drinking so much if you always do it before or at parties. It sorta impairs your social abilities, it forces you to shut-down and not confront problems such as AA, and it creates an artificial dependance on it. GJ on quitting masturbation though, I try to go through with it but only last like 4-7 days each time. I wish I could do it for like a month but still.


4. The more important part of the game is inner game, both for your sake and because it automatically makes you more attractive. It's all about being fine with who you are and conveying positivity and good humor. Realize this is the most important thing.

First of all, thank you for reading my journal and supporting me.

1. The thing is that it happened so fast. We started dancing and after 15 seconds her friend pulled her away. But because I knew she liked me and because her friend was so playful, I just had to approach her again. She responded just how I predicted and started dancing even more sexual+bit my neck. But again after 10 seconds of her biting my neck her friend pulled her and took her on the other side of club. I totally forgot to escalate...
I'm pretty sure that if I approached again or if I tried to introduce myself to her and friend I would be able to close the deal.
While I think demonstrating unneediness is important I'm not sure that I was doing so in this moment, because I could see her wanting me to approach her and it was her friends fault for moving her.
I didn't follow her and I continued to have fun and nothing happened so I don't know about that...

We were playing cat and mouse and I really regret I didn't escalate or follow her becase she was really hot. It just happened so fast...

2. You're absolutely right. I spend too much time on the dancefloor. I'm gonna take this advice and use it the next time I go out.
My goal will be to approach girl that is not on dance floor, talk to her and try to get something out of that. I think that dancefloor game depends to much more on your looks than normal gaming.

3. 2pac is my favourite rapper. I love him. I had to get drunk that night haha But yea, I'm gonna stop drinking as much as I am right now. It just makes me worser at gaming and more retarded.

Yea I'm really proud about me not masturbating. It's sooooooo hard when you see hot chick on facebook or on the street and you get boner and you cant masturbate. It fucking sucks haha. I just wanna find and fuck her right now.

4. My inner game has changed alot after reading Psycho-Cybernetics by Maxwell Maltz. I still have long way to go though.

Again man, thank you for advices and support. I had feeling like noone was reading this stuff anymore. I'm gonna keep improving. NO excuses! Peace

_________________
No excuses!

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Peace man, happy hunting and keep us updated

Today was my last driving school class and I wanted to approach one chick HB9.
The only reason why she isn't above 9 is because she is little bit shorter. The chick has perfect big ass, solid boobs and pretty face. Yesterday, I was thinking about her all day...

Well sorry to dissapoint you guys, but I pussied out. I was with my friend that kept talking about some retarded stuff I didn't want to hear and that girl was with 2 of her friends all the time so I kept making out excuses. I'm not going to lie I feel like shit right now.

I was in the short conversation with some other girl though.(HB8) She had smoking hot body, but so-so face. I think she was really into me, but at that time, all I was thinking about was that HB9 chick. I didn't even think about talking to the HB8 more and getting the number.

So why do I feel like shit right now. It's because when I left out of the tram I saw that HB8 girl in front of me, but she was walking sooo fast that the only way I coulda catch her was to run and go talk to her. I started walking as fast as I could but I couldn't catch her... (the street was also crowded and people were constantly blocking my way) I don't even remember her last name so I can't track her on facebook.(right now I just rememberd I could've just shouted her name... wow I froze so hard)

I was constantly saying: "I can do it, I can do it..." haha, but fuck it. I feel very bad right now... It's the first time in a while that I pussied out from approaching. I think that I'm much more limited when it comes to day game and that I should definitely start to practice it.

Damn man... I can't even describe you guys how I feel right now. This is much worser than getting rejected... Fuck

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No excuses!

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