Hi men,

This has been a sticking point for a while, and I'd like to get your opinions on this case.
Since the day i've learnt that 'Pick up' exists, my view changed towards gaming women. Thankfully.

Nevertheless,

Material says you have to act 'not-needy, dominant, hold the frame, be cocky/funny, play hard to get'.

RIGHT

Don't get me wrong , I believe in cat-string theory and I'm sure a girl gets attracted to a dominant not needy man... But imagine.

You're past the attraction phase.

Fine, I've got there but then the problem starts.

I often get the response from women that i'm arrogant, overly cocky ...

And I can relate.

Imagine

A girl has had a hard day at work, and needs a shoulder to rest on... and shows some attitude.

Game says: you set the frame, you're the man, be dominant

But then In her eyes.

* Being cocky might come off as being an asshole?
* He's a selfish basterd?
* Not giving her a compliment on her looks, coz you are the prize?

Is this the right time to forget game and be genuine with her, because I don't want to be coming off as a jerk...

Sometimes I want to express nice words towards a woman, act more needy then I supposed to do, but I'm not doing this because game tells me I can't.

I believe overgaming is becoming a sticking point.

Insights?
Thanks.

is she your GF, or are you treating your relationship with the girl as an LTR?
then, yes, by all means do not game her. be that shoulder.
if you overgame your GF by not providing emotional support when required, you are doomed for single-land fairly quickly.
you are also allowed to show that you care for her. this does not mean you can be a needy AFC, but every once in a while you are more than welcome to send a quick note saying "Good morning honey. I love you". it will make her day. promised

_________________
nice guys don't get laid
"It's disrespectful not to bang them when they sleepover." (Hellhound)

You have hit the nail on the head buddy. I tried being all of those, 3 times in a row when she came home all tired from a long days work. Don;t try to correct their attitude, it goes south and fast. It ends up into a "who is right" war. They get soooo on the defensive because it makes them feel like you have complet disregard of their feelings.

Don't do it. Be compassionate and sincere. Be that shoulder!!

_________________
Easy to dream a dream, but much harder to live it.
I learned working with the negatives could make for better pictures.

Thanks for the replies!

Well we aren't in a LTR, although she already acts like she is my wife.

Got another question though

If you don't want a LTR with a girl, is being the shoulder she can rest on coming over as being a nice guy? Will this get you in the dreaded friendzone?

Cheers![/i]

if you bang her good, definitely not.. but it will get you closer and closer to the dreaded LTR-land

_________________
nice guys don't get laid
"It's disrespectful not to bang them when they sleepover." (Hellhound)

I really don't want to start posting again too much, but I've struggled with this myself, so I figured I'd help if I could. Cat string is fun and great, but there is a time and place for everything. Being a man isn't about control or frame so much as having integrity in who you are and how you treat people. A man wouldn't shit on someone who's down, he'd help them up so they could stand on their own two feet again.

Game should never be about actual games or bull shit immature player stuff, it should be about YOU bringing out the best of you.

Too cool for school, gets old, fast. Drop it.

Edit: if you want to be nice, then be nice. Respect and treating someone right isn't the same as writing her love songs or doing other corny shit. You CAN be cat string and nice as well. Think of it more in terms of your own respect and integrity as opposed to one-upping her.

I went out with a 9 last night, I did push/pull, but still treated her like a lady. Think: Gone with the Wind. Rhett's a gentleman, but it doesn't mean Scarlett can walk all over him either.

Yes, GWTW, so fucking what, I'm Southern. LOL