The ongoing story of a HB10, and me. Seeking guidance.



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PostPosted: Sun Aug 05, 2012 9:22 am 
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Firstly, let me say that you are in store for a long post. If you have difficulty reading long posts, you probably want to bail out now. That said, I will attempt to make it as easy to read as possible through proper punctuation, spelling, sentence structure, and REAL PARAGRAPHS!

Since I cannot recollect every single important detail of this story in one pass, I am hoping that you guys will catch things that maybe I missed in my recounting of this ongoing tale, and ask questions to help understand the situation better.

Furthermore, you have my oath (as if that means anything) that everything I post here will be 100% true to the best of my recollection even if it is potentially embarrassing for me. I feel that without an honest dialogue, no results can be achieved...and I am here for results.

So, here goes...

I'm 32, and about a year ago a close friend of mine informed me that his band was performing at a mutual friends house party. I agreed to show up as I was excited to see him and his band play. Turns out the house party was in fact a "get together" for creative minds. You know, artists, musicians, writers, poets, etc. There were also several people there that I would consider "intellectuals". For example, the founder of an online artists community who was a web designer.

Personally, I am not an "artist". I'm actually in Aerospace. However, I do write as a hobby, and I appreciate artistic types. In any case, I felt I was around MY people. People I was comfortable with. I was IN THE ZONE that night. I felt extremely good around this particular group of people and I must have been exuding an aura of confidence and charisma, because at one point I had the entire room huddled around me and the web-designer (male), discussing human interaction, attraction, the school system, self-expression, dating, and everything else under the sun.

At one point during the evening, I was standing in a hallway with my friends who had just finished doing their set, listening to their conversation and chatting among them. Through the hall comes a drop dead gorgeous brunette. 5'6"ish, wild hair, petite body, eyes that suck you in, and the fullest, sexiest natural lips you've ever seen.

As she tries to pass, I make an attempt to step out of her way, when in fact, I step into it. You know how this one goes... Back and forth, until eventually you both laugh. Mid way through this interaction, I look her dead in the eyes, smile gleaming on my face and I say, "Wanna dance?"

She smiles, casually walks by, and leans over her shoulder and says encouragingly, "Maybe later?"

After she passes, I immediately turn to my best friend and say, "Watch.. That girl and I will talk later."

After a while, the party starts to break up a bit and people are less about watching the entertainment and more about mingling and catching up. I take a break from charming the shit out of the entire room to make my way outside for a cigarette break.

No sooner do I light up, than the beautiful brunette from earlier follows me out and walks up beside me, asking me if I have a light. Of course, I do. We start feeling one another out. Asking how each of us knows J (the owner of the house), etc.

Come to find out, J and his girlfriend are living with this girl, L, and her boyfriend. Her boyfriend is a young (early 20's) artsy-emo-type.. small guy, wild purple hair, boyish good looks. Do not get me wrong: He's a nice guy. I have nothing against him and whatever look he has is clearly working for him if he has landed this undisputed 10.

After talking to her more, I learn she's a model. Not the type of girl who says she's a model because she was in a toothpaste commercial. Not the type of girl who does KMART ads or the JCPenneys Catalog. This girl is a LEGIT model. She does model work all over the world. Italy, France, New York, LA, Vegas.. You get the idea. A lot of alternative stuff, but no nudes or pornography. She's a half-white, half-asian 24 year old with a brain in her head. Anthropology major, been modeling since she was a pre-teen and owned an art gallery downtown at one point. The only reason she's not on a runway is because she's 5'6" rather than 6'0". Get the picture?

So, rather than being in shock and awe of this girl, I simply suggest that "we" (her boyfriend included) should get sushi some time.. We exchange facebook info and possibly phone numbers. (I honestly can't remember if I got her phone # or not.)

Over the course of the next year or so, we catch up with one another maybe 2-3 times through Facebook messenger, and I make the occasional comment on something she has posted on her facebook. She's always posting the latest and greatest pictures from her modeling career.

I understand that she is busy, out of town a lot, has a boyfriend, and I probably have no chance in hell, but I hang in there without being needy or demanding. I just chill out and figure "Hey, at least I can say I know a semi-celeb personally".

I find out through her facebook she and her boyfriend break up at some point.. We chat about her moving out and I find she's living on my side of town with her female roommate. For quite some time I rarely see her actually "online".

But... One day I do...

So, I send her this one simple message, "Hey you. When we getting that sushi?"

She responds, and says "Soon!".. Proceeds to explain how busy she's been, but follows it up with her schedule (which is packed).. She offers up her number and then asks for mine. I give it to her, and I agree to text her later in the week to see where her schedule stands.

I end up seeing her online a few days later, and we chat for 2 hours straight. We make plans for the coming weekend. She texts me Wednesday (our plans were for Friday) and lets me know that she has to reschedule. At this point I'm thinking, "Here we go again, I'm getting the run around."... So I play it cool. "No problem." I don't expect to hear from her.

But I do... She contacts me that weekend and we make plans for the following Friday. And this time, the plans came to pass. We agree to meet at a sushi restaurant that is relatively close to both of us, right near the major college here in town.

I wear slacks and a loose fitting, light blue button up shirt, get a haircut, a car wash.. you know how it goes. I show up slightly early and send her a text asking her if she wants to sit at the bar, or table.. She emphatically states "Table!", so I get us a table and sit by myself for what seems like an eternity.. The waitress ends up coming over and chatting me up.

I keep reminding myself to remain relaxed. Don't look too often at the entrance.. Don't be tense. Don't lean forward to her. Don't talk too much or too little.. Don't ramble. Be casual. Be cool. Be confident. Show her you like her but don't come across as needy. Don't compliment her.

The waitress saves me at this point, to be honest.. We start talking about a near-by comedy club that just closed down and it gets me engaged in a conversation that puts me at ease.. So when "L" walks up, I am already "involved" in something else. I stand up to greet her and give her a very "safe" hug, as a greeting, then casually pull her chair out for her and fill her in on the conversation the waitress and I were just having. "Wow I didn't realize this place was so close to this venue.. Did you hear they just closed down? I loved that place."

She apologizes for being late, and seems... tense at first. Almost nervous. Looks down quite a bit. The waitress gives us menus and walks away as I try to break the ice. I ask her how her day has been, what she likes on the menu, etc.. She gives me the cue to order for her.. Says she likes just about anything. I read off 3 things I like and she says "I enjoy all of those!".

When it comes to ordering sake, she schools me a bit.. Explains that places warm sake to cover the poor quality of it.. sort of like using a fruit or a flavor or a mix to cover the low quality of a vodka or tequila.

At this point she starts loosening up a bit. Our conversations flow back and forth smoothly over the course of 3 hours. When the bottle of sake arrived, I poured her first shot for her.. She sips it.. I down mine in an instant. We talk and talk, smile and laugh a bit. Later in the conversation, she must have noticed my sake was empty so she pours me another shot. I'm having a genuinely good time with this girl and her smile makes my insides glow. She asks me what I do for work.. I ask her about her life. We order another round of drinks (Vodka for me and a sake bomber for her.)

We move out back, sitting on the patio smoking together, having open and sincere conversations about everything under the sun.. I prompt her questions from time to time, like "Top 3 rock bands in the last 50 years?", and "What do you feel are your 3 most dominant qualities as a person?". I got the feeling she genuinely was enjoying my company.

But, as with everything else, all good things must come to an end and she eventually excuses herself. Says she promised a (female) friend she'd drop by this evening. We walk out to our cars together, and she opens up and gives me a hug. She tells me she had a great time and commented on the good conversation.

At this point, I was nervous. I thought going for anything more than a hug may be presumptuous, so I let her take the lead. There was a bit of awkwardness walking back to our cars.. I felt like if I followed her to her car I would seem needy or creepy, so I just told her "there's mine", and wished her a good evening and walked away.. She did the same, although it seemed she was hesitant as well.

When we briefly spoke again later on, she made another mention of having a good time and great conversation, TWICE more.. For a total of three times. This entire last week she's been out of town and busy as hell, so I haven't heard from her much.

So, this is where I need your guys help.

This girl is literally everything a guy could want. She's a 10 not just physically but in every way I am privy to at this point. I am not in a hurry to get into her pants. I am genuinely attracted to her beyond her obviously astounding looks.

I want to try to get her to meet up with me again for an activity of some kind. Something where we can see each others personalities come out more.. Something that isn't so formal as dinner.

So, simply put..What should my next steps be? What should I watch out for? Have I done okay up to this point? Were the hug and the refilling of my sake indicators of interest? Am I reading too much into it because I want it to be true and was she just being polite, or should I take those as signs that she is attracted to me?

Thanks for reading this far.. Now it's your turn. I'm all yours.


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PostPosted: Sun Aug 05, 2012 4:55 pm 
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Hi mate, congrats on meeting a really great girl. I can tell by the way you speak that you are a cool guy and deserve such a 10. I'm 21, and I've only slept with three girls, but they have all been "perfect 10's", so I know where your coming from. I've had the opportunity to sleep with probably 50-70 girls, but I genuinely only date 10's.

Let me tell you from a game perspective, something that I have been guilty of myself, that I think we're all guilty of. We see the 10, and we think 'fuck.. I'm really guna have to pull out the big guns here..' but gaming a 10 is in essence the exact same as gaming an 8, or even a 7, aside from a couple of things which I'll mention in a minute. The routines, psychology and attraction switches are ALL the same. Don't try any complex shit because she's a 10, even when it comes to dates that you take the 7's, take the 10's there as well.
  • 1. The negs, 10's will require slightly more negging because the perceived beauty value they have acquired throughout their life is more than that of a 7. If you raise your value too high with a 7, without giving her some IOI's, she will start to believe that your value is too high and to save her the public embarrassment to her peers or ego hit she will blow you out, whereas with a 10, it is empirical that you neg her to lower her perceived value so you can demonstrate high value. Once this high value has been achieved, she will be able to IOI your DHV spikes, and then you can begin kino testing and calibrating, however, if you didn't neg enough, you would of not been able to advance that far.

    2. The fucked up thing about 10's, that I only learned last week, but upon reflection to the 10's that I have been together with, is actually true.
    To land a 10 you MUST introduce a jealousy plot-line. Just as pre-selection is the biggest attraction switch in a girl, for a 10 it is vitally important that you en corporate the fact that she is not the only girl in your reality that you are considering.
    As men we don't understand this because we are not instantly more attracted to a girl because she has a boyfriend, but woman are. Just accept that over time evolution has hard-wired females this way.
    She will only seriously realise her attraction for you, when she realises that she is competing with other females.
I just got distracted on a SPAM call and it is now 4:10am here so I will summarise quickly what I read from your post, my advice, bear in mind that I will follow up and write in more detail should you need it, when I have more spare time.

Whilst the advice I give you might be technical I want it noted that I did successfully pick up my first 10 when I had read/learned absolute zero game. In my AFC days. The reason I say this is that while I may had been lucky and flipped attraction switched by accident, I solidly believe that I achieved that 10 due to congruence, 'real' talking and interactions, and solid inner game. Which, by what I read of your detailed post, you submitted to her and have.

"When you're doing something wrong and no one is bothering to tell you anymore, that's a bad place to be. It means they gave up on you. Your critics are the ones that are telling you they still love you and care." -The videos section of this forum.

You need to change your frame. You are the prize. Period.
If you do not change this frame, you will not have success with this girl.

The first two paragraphs in your post were DLV's. You want us to add value to your thread, for us to add value, be a man of value. Tell us that this post is fucking worth reading! (We may learn something, I did). I am scared that you may have done this around your 10, DLV'd by accident. It's okay to DLV, just not when you are attracting a partner. You have not kissed her yet so you should not be DLVing.

You blew this set.
You tried to be a nice guy.
You accommodated to her whims.
You let her control the set.
She won the frame game.

The fact that you are older is great, this will be slightly more attractive to her if you convey the right elderly male frame. (Abundance of resources, patient, understanding, real world problem solver, slightly better social alpha male).

What I like that you did. You gave off an un-needy vibe. This is why I think you got the date(1SEE SIDE NOTE), and all that I think you have going for you in terms of flipping her attraction switch. Non-neediness can pre-curse certain attraction circuts in her brain such as pre-selection, HOWEVER you have not triggered pre-selection you have just hinted that it 'could' be there.

(1 Make no mistake, that is what it is! She has plausible deniability that you were 'just meeting up for a bite because you were both in the area'. The reality is that you are a man, she is a woman, unconsciously she knows you are already attracted to her, this is impossible to hide unconsciously, but as PUA's get better, it becomes almost invisible, consciously.)

She met you in a place that you were passionate and carefree, you didn't care whether you spoke to her again or not, when you first opened her. You were congruent with this throughout your relationship with her. I like this dude, respect.

You were the leader of men and the 'centre of attention' at the gallery. Boom you just flipped another attraction switch.

She's not thinking of you romantically like you are her, you could be heading in the friend zone, you blotched the date. Quickly, here's why.

You tried to be a nice guy.
You accommodated to her whims.

You called her up and asked her 'table or bar.. ' Bs man, you decide. When you're married with her and your son little timmy is getting bullied at school are you going to call her up and ask her shall we deal with this at the table or bar? ..could of chosen a better example but my point is that at an unconscious mate-seeking level, this is how she is thinking bro!
You were nervous bro and I understand, you think too much in your head when your nervous. I recommend some inner-game and I can direct you to some material if that's the thing you want.

She controlled the frame. She was the prize. Throughout your FB relationship this was clear.
"So, I send her this one simple message, "Hey you. When we getting that sushi?" "

better: *You know she's in town because you can see it on FB* "Heya, I'm busy on Wed's and Fri so let's get that sushi on Thursday"

"She responds, and says "Soon!".. Proceeds to explain how busy she's been"

Calibrate that shit with an IOD.
Quote:
I wear slacks and a loose fitting, light blue button up shirt, get a haircut, a car wash.. you know how it goes.
Be well groomed, for sure. But you will experience more success when your inner game is so strong that you went on this date, late from work, tired, hung over, and she gets the feel that you're not here to impress. When you are up to it, you are the life and energy of your situations and she loves that about you and wants to be in your presence. I can talk about inner game forever so I highly recommend it's what you look into next.

My advice from here:

Mate, I probably did worse without game on my first 10. I still got her though. The funny thing is that I remember that she flaked me our first date.. I remember going on break for our Uni class and told my best mate that L had flaked (I'd been talking about her heaps!) He acknowledge my feelings so I knew he knew how guttered I was, fuck.. how had I blown it. He reminded me it was "all good man, we'll go do this and this and this, and dude we got Beverly and Hitomi back in there!!"
Guess what bro I got over the flake and my inner game and ego strengthened so much that I eventually asked her out again via txt, to which we met.

Same goes for you brother, you have a GREAT tool now that I didnt have back then. She is your facebook friend. Read on these forums how to make a killer profile. Let her passively know how busy you are with your own life and social interactions. Txt her of social situations you're in that remind you of her and invite her out consistently, until you get your next date. Don't give up.

Never comment on her looks, if you are paying a compliment, it MUST be on her personality. This gives her a frame that she perceives is in your mind that she likes and wants to be, and a reason to fit to that frame you have set for her.

You let her control the set.
She won the frame game.

YOU MUST LEARN HOW TO CALIBRATE IOI's and IOD's. Go and research. This is also known as push pull.
Why did she win the set and did she control the frame game you might be asking?
Quote:
At this point, I was nervous. I thought going for anything more than a hug may be presumptuous, so I let her take the lead. There was a bit of awkwardness walking back to our cars.. I felt like if I followed her to her car I would seem needy or creepy, so I just told her "there's mine", and wished her a good evening and walked away.. She did the same, although it seemed she was hesitant as well.
Bro, let me reveal something to you. Kino escalation WILL result in resistance. Infact, as skilled PUA's we actually know and expect that we WILL get resistance, we HAVE to. How else can we know where the threshold is and how far in we are, and what we have to do next material wise??
Resistance is good man, when you learn to condition her negative resistance to IOD's and her positive behaviour to IOI's, you'll breeze through. With strong inner game you will be fearless when it comes to starting this stuff.

By the looks of your post you are on track, but you need to do a lot of soul-searching, reading, and dedication to attracting woman. I will do whatever I can to help you.

-D


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 06, 2012 12:45 am 
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Great post man, I truly appreciate the time given to reading my post and then responding in such a detailed way.

Besides doing a lot of research and working on my OWN perspective... What actual STEPS can I take to push this one in the right direction?

I am assuming I will probably get a text from her sometime early this week.. Or possibly a FB message. What can I do at this point to DHV while also setting up some more opportunities for us to get together?

At what point should I attempt to kiss her? How should I set that up? Etc.. These are the kinds of questions that plague me.


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 06, 2012 5:59 am 
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Quote:
Her boyfriend is a young (early 20's) artsy-emo-type.. small guy, wild purple hair, boyish good looks. Do not get me wrong: He's a nice guy. I have nothing against him and whatever look he has is clearly working for him if he has landed this undisputed 10.
This is called pea-cocking, some guys do it without knowing that it's used in proper pickup. They just achieved results doing this at school/work incidentially and have continued to do so. I reccommend you look into it.
Girls do it all the time, yet socially, I find it is more acceptable for them for some reason.

Eg, paint their nails, colour their hair, mani/peti, wear scarves, necklasses, earings, bracelets, dangley bracelets.

If you are a social male out wearing some of these things, they will greatly amplify the reactions and vibes you put out. For example.

A PUA is wearing those items and sitting by himself in a restraunt waiting for his food. Instead now, of his social value dropping slightly by being on his own in a social gathering, it is dramatically dropping because he is out-landishly looking over the top. In contrast, however

If a PUA wearing those items is in field with a group of people all looking and facing him while he is holding court in an interesting conversation with spots of halerious laughter then his social value sky-rockets. Peacocking will only amply your results.

You will get more positive and negative attention from both members of sex, this is part of why peacocking is a form of DHV. It shows that you will be able to handel such comments and almost expect people to make a fuss of you. You'll have to understand hoop theory and social frames well to dominate in this area. It's great practice though.
Quote:
Besides doing a lot of research and working on my OWN perspective... What actual STEPS can I take to push this one in the right direction?
Txt her of social situations you're in that remind you of her and invite her out consistently, until you get your next date. If you sense she's likely to flake on you flake before her. If she flakes you it's a simple process:
IOD, DHV compliance test -> IOI.

When you recieve the txt, talk about how busy your week is and life is. There's only one true commonality I have when it comes to success with woman, talking. You mentioned on your last date the mood dropped on the way out to the car. Talk talk talk, talking is a great tool to help with the logistics of your set. You want to be telling her ALL your stories that encompass DHV's. Just subtle ones though. A short logistically boring story that conveys certain emotions and the way you charismatically deliver that story to her, she will feel those emotions, it doesn't matter about the story content.

Talk, you are the centre of your reality. You're not looking to see what reactions you get from her, you're talking because you are so interested in what you're saying. She will feel this vibe from you and want to be a part of that value you are offering. Once you achieve a talkative state successfully then she will start talking with you about things you've reminded her of. Remember you dont want to be talking logically to her, you only want to talk about things that are going to provoke emtions in her, or flip attraction switches.

Bad example. This dinner is so tasty, I love how they have marinated the pork. It's sweet, goes down well. The desert is great also, the chocolate really completes the ice cream.

Good example. Damn the dinner here is tasty! I love how they marinted the pork, it reminds me of when my chinese friend invited me over for tea eg eg.
Oh and the desert, do you remember when you were a kid and you had your FIRST bite on ice cream... do you remember that? I do, I was blah blah..


You'll also want to be familiar with grounding routines to build comfort with this woman.

Quote:
At what point should I attempt to kiss her? How should I set that up? Etc.. These are the kinds of questions that plague me.
By the time you kiss her, you will have smelt her neck and hair, before that you will have held her hand, before that she'll be able to take your arm prominade style, before that you might have given her a palm reading, or played thunb wars with her, before that you would have done slight touching when she has just given you an IOI.
The point here is that you aren't going to plunge right in to a kiss. You need to understand how the process goes. We've been fucked by Hollywood movies that show couples that just kiss for the first time, that's not how it works.

All kino should be done in a one-sweep movement, rather than statically. for eg, talking to her about something and touch slowly down her arm at the same time, it has a start point and an end point, instead of just placing your hand on her leg.

With keno you ALWAYS want to be the one that ends it. People think that it should be the mans job to persue and the womans job to resist. ITS NOT. Men have to do both. Take it away at the peak of her enjoyment, and initiate it right after an IOI. You may even calibrate verbally while physically taking her hands "woah let's slow this down a tad" "Don't get any ideas"

Watch matador's videos on youtube. Lovedrop. Mystery. They are all pros you can learn from.


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 06, 2012 9:13 am 
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A couple of recent interactions...

About a week ago on fb:


me: Hey, hope you got home (or to your friends house) safe .. Didn't think to ask if you were okay to drive.


her: Ah yes, I got there just fine! Thanks though. I had a good time. good conversation!

me (transitioned to text): Good. :) Glad you enjoyed yourself. I did as well.

me: You seem like a really open person, which is comforting.

her: Im too open haha. once you get past the barrier.

me: I can relate... well, without the barrier. I lack much of a filter. Get's me in a lot of trouble. :)

me: Does that mean I've somehow managed to get passed that barrier?



Knowing how busy she is this last week and thinking I may have overstepped my bounds, I back off and don't text her again.


Earlier tonight on FB, she posts a picture of her holding up a pair of bike shorts with a "print" on the crotch of cock and balls... similar to one of these: http://pontecommedia.files.wordpress.co ... prons1.jpg


So, I post this..


me: I see your schwartz is as big as mine!


her: haha! perfect size for me :)



Flirty? Hmm!


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 07, 2012 10:01 am 
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Bumpity, and...

Considering our first interaction I asked her to dance, do you think it would be a good idea to use "dancing" as a good way to start some kino escalation?

I was thinking of inviting her out to shoot some pool, which also could also open the opportunity for some kino. At some point, perhaps asking her to face me and give me her hands.. then starting to salsa or something with her.

Also, should I remain on the DL until she contacts me or should I pursue her? Part of me thinks she's just busy, and since she isn't in town right now and we can't make any plans it would be pointless to contact me. She DOES respond to my facebook post on her picture in what seems to be a flirty way, (or possibly it's a shit test to see if I'll blow it by taking it too seriously and going overboard like many guys would do?)

I guess the question is: How much contact should I be initiating at this point?


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 07, 2012 10:21 am 
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Shit test. Flirting is done face to face.

Ask her out somewhere mundane and boring, you have to kino-escalate on your own. Pool could be a good idea but it could also be too serious.

While you're doing this task 'just' go to the next place. Bounce with her as many times as you can. It helps distort her reality of you. For eg, if you spend 3 hours with her playing pool, and the two of you overall have a good time then she has good memories of you both playing pool.
If you stop by the mall because you're wanting a female opinion for a gift to another female (relative or friend you choose) and she gives opinion or tries on clothes for you because she's the same size, then 'YOU' feel like a coffee and take her to starbucks. Then you want to show her this cool place that 'reminded you of DHV spike story'. Hold out your arm (promenade style) "This is all you get", make fucking hilarious jokes about how you have to keep her safe crossing the road (kino) (protector of loved ones) tick tick.
This gives her many emotional memories of you and her in several places and has a far better impact and way of bonding you two together in her mind.


Time constraints the whole way, (fake of course). Fuck her telling you when it's over like last time. If, for some reason, she really has to go, then you've been having to go for the last hour so she's politely doing you a favour. Make sure the delivery is sincere. Sometimes it wont be verbal, it will just be you firing off a txt. Do this when you need to calibrate an IOD.

If it's on while you're out with her, ie you're getting either passive or obvious IOI's then you MUST escalate - notice I said even if you get PASSIVE IOI's.
If you don't, you are the beta male and will make a good friend.

Gl, sir!

-D


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 07, 2012 10:15 pm 
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Models, Actresses and generally, women in the spotlight fear that their occupation and public image makes them liable to objectification by men. They think that they cannot find anyone who can look past the layers of make-up and the stunning features, and appreciate the kind of person they really are.

She is a fashion model. Probably held up as a sexual ideal. You need to not let it affect you to the extent that, that is all you can see about her (Count the number of times you've used "model" in your initial post). Clearly you're affected by her occupation and status, to the extent that you didn't even escalate properly at the end of your dinner, which left you with an "awkward" feeling.

Here's the truth : You can be well groomed, a thorough gentleman, perfect etiquette and all the like. But, at some point you have to be careful. Do not let it reach to a level where you become overcivilized. Where you become afraid of your instincts -afraid of being a man.

When this whole equation boils down, it just comes to a man and a woman and addressing the topic of attraction between them. Rest is just mere details.

If you want to get anywhere with her, you will need to be bolder than you are currently. You will need to be unfazed by her occupation. And you will need to be straightforward in letting her know exactly what you want and exactly what you feel. And keep the white noise in the conversation to the minimum. Maximize the personal discussion.

Good luck.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "


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PostPosted: Wed Aug 08, 2012 2:05 am 
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Quote:
And keep the white noise in the conversation to the minimum. Maximize the personal discussion.
Pure golden words. If pickup has genuine secrets - this is one.


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PostPosted: Wed Aug 08, 2012 10:36 am 
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Quote:
Models, Actresses and generally, women in the spotlight fear that their occupation and public image makes them liable to objectification by men. They think that they cannot find anyone who can look past the layers of make-up and the stunning features, and appreciate the kind of person they really are.

She is a fashion model. Probably held up as a sexual ideal. You need to not let it affect you to the extent that, that is all you can see about her (Count the number of times you've used "model" in your initial post). Clearly you're affected by her occupation and status, to the extent that you didn't even escalate properly at the end of your dinner, which left you with an "awkward" feeling.

Here's the truth : You can be well groomed, a thorough gentleman, perfect etiquette and all the like. But, at some point you have to be careful. Do not let it reach to a level where you become overcivilized. Where you become afraid of your instincts -afraid of being a man.

When this whole equation boils down, it just comes to a man and a woman and addressing the topic of attraction between them. Rest is just mere details.

If you want to get anywhere with her, you will need to be bolder than you are currently. You will need to be unfazed by her occupation. And you will need to be straightforward in letting her know exactly what you want and exactly what you feel. And keep the white noise in the conversation to the minimum. Maximize the personal discussion.

Good luck.

With all due respect, I don't think it's her occupation which fazes me. I lost my virginity at 16 to a 33 year old teacher. I was in a serious relationship with a singer/actress for 5 years. I've dated porn stars and strippers as recently as this year.

I emphasized that she was a model and what type of model she was to illustrate that she is drop dead gorgeous. Not ALL models are necessarily gorgeous. I also contrasted it with the fact that she's extremely talented and intelligent.

Here's the thing.. Approaching, kissing, or having sex with ANY type of woman does not faze me. That is not what I am intimidated by. What I am intimidated by is that this girl exceeds all of my expectations. She's not only gorgeous, but she's intelligent. She's not only intelligent, but she's talented, she's motivated, she's successful, she has no kids, she's young but mature, she's cultured, she's exotic, she's never been married/divorced, she's never had cosmetic surgery, etc. On top of all of this, I feel chemistry with her. The way she looks at the world.

You take this same girl and put her in a Burger King drive thru window, then make her physically a 7 instead of a 10, and I'd still be nervous about screwing it up because this is one that I don't want to let get away.

I *almost* had a similar girl in my early 20's who was an Anthropology major. She was INTO me... but she was on the rebound, and I may have been too assertive, so she backed off. I let her go for a while and contacted her much later.. She was in a relationship. A few years later, she hunted me down and I was in a relationship and living across the country. I moved back to this side of the country, and she was in a relationship again.

Needless to say, I don't want to let another opportunity like that pass me by, and I don't want to screw it up with this girl. Being "Bold" isn't a problem if I feel it's appropriate, but I certainly don't want to blow it by moving too fast.

I feel a lot of the PUA material is for when you need to get a girls attention from the first time you meet her. I feel like this girl already has *some* attraction to me. I may or may not have blown it already... we will see in the near future.

What I'm here for is learning how to escalate without freaking her out and without moving so slow that I stuck in the friend zone. I want to be able to properly understand the subtle nuances and I need the help of other, more experienced men, to do that without bias or prejudice.

Which leads me back to a question which I posed earlier, and I'm not sure I've gotten an answer to: How much should I pursue? How often/much should I initiate contact? This is one of the things I struggle with and find difficult to gauge.

I have had a lot of problems in recent history with opening, and getting an attraction, but then losing it because I couldn't/didn't properly calibrate my actions afterwards.

I have no problem walking up to a 10 in a club/bar/where-ever and starting a conversation.

After I know there's an attraction and there has been some IOI's, I have no problem maintaining a relationship with a girl.

What I have issues with is coming off as too needy or too wussy during the building rapport stage, which is where I feel I'm at now, with this girl. Hence my anxiety.

Hope you understand, thanks. :)


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PostPosted: Wed Aug 08, 2012 10:47 am 
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How do I post up my Omegle conversation screen shots on the forum? So I can learn from the comments. I'm 17 and just got ADDICTED to game.


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PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 2:59 am 
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Bump bump.


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PostPosted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 11:19 am 
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Update with some recent information...

via text:

me: "If you're in town tomorrow you should go out with me."

her: I'm working at [annual venue here in town]

me: "Oo. Is that here in town?"

her: Yea. (location)

me: "What's the cover? Is it an 'open' event?"

her: Not sure. I think it's 30? [website info]

me: "Is it cool if I show up?"

her: Of course! Although ill be working so I wont be able to hang out much. :/

me: "No problem. But you owe me a dance."

me: "I might show up. I'll see if I can get a friend to come with me. So, maybe see you tomorrow? ;)"

me: "You DO remember how you owe me a dance, right? :)"

her: ?

me: "First time I met you I asked if you wanted to dance. You said "Maybe later." It's definitely later."

her: At the house?

me: "Haha. Yes. I can't expect you to make good on it if you don't remember... and it technically wasn't a 'promise'. ;)"




Any observations? Advice? Input?


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PostPosted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 11:57 am 
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you're needy for this hardcore, I know she's hot and all that or what ever, but she is just a person dude, just because she is good looking does not make her think less of people and it does not make her like sex any less, what it does do however is fuck up guys self confidence because they deleope an ego around the girl that keeps telling them they are not good enough, so they meet the girl, the halo effect comes into play all of a sudden she is perfect in every way (when in reality she is often far from it), she goes up on the pedastool and they start exibiting approval seeking/reaction seeking type behavior out of their neediness when all they had to do was treat her like a normal human being and bang her, buisness as usual, you are pussing way the fuck out, you said you have nailed porn stars, a teacher and blah blah blah, why is this chick different? she is a girl just like the rest of them, you just don't want to fuck it up cause you need her, she is too special up high on her perfect pedastool, just because a person is good looking doesn't mean they are any different, to her a 7 is a 7 and a 10 is a 10, my ex-gf's friend is a geuine 9/10, she is absolutely smoking georgous and extremely promiscuous to the point of having a fairly well known reputation, she likes tall good looking guys and when we were talking about relationships she told me she usually has to initiate when it comes to sex cause most guys are too intimidated beyond giving her attention, she also has a problem with guys falling in love with her after sex when she just wants casual sex, now she isn't the norm as most of the girls I have met are not into just casual sex, but most girls want a guy that they find attractive to roll in, show her he is cool and genuine, sweep her off her feet and fuck the shit out of her, not some guy to go in, chat with her, get nervous and be careful about what he does to show her how uncool and ungenuine he is, fall in love and get neurotic before anything has happened, this sets off red flags that you couldn't just be normal if she dated you, just do your thing and stop worrying about it, she likes you or she doesn't, the longer you put this shit off and demonstrate your lack of confidence the more reason she has to not sleep with you, make a damn descision and stick with it, if you're playing to not lose, it's harder to win

don draper kicked this post in the balls, he's onto it

and believe in yourself man, you got this shit, if she meets with you and flirts, what more do you need? p goes into v, your a guy, she's a girl, keep it simple and do it up

GOOD LUCK


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PostPosted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 3:56 pm 
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Joined: Sat Jun 30, 2012 12:49 pm
Posts: 37
Location: New Zealand
Quote:
Update with some recent information...

via text:

me: "If you're in town tomorrow you should go out with me."

her: I'm working at [annual venue here in town]

me: "Oo. Is that here in town?"

her: Yea. (location)

me: "What's the cover? Is it an 'open' event?"

her: Not sure. I think it's 30? [website info]

me: "Is it cool if I show up?"

her: Of course! Although ill be working so I wont be able to hang out much. :/

me: "No problem. But you owe me a dance."

me: "I might show up. I'll see if I can get a friend to come with me. So, maybe see you tomorrow? ;)"

me: "You DO remember how you owe me a dance, right? :)"

her: ?

me: "First time I met you I asked if you wanted to dance. You said "Maybe later." It's definitely later."

her: At the house?

me: "Haha. Yes. I can't expect you to make good on it if you don't remember... and it technically wasn't a 'promise'. ;)"




Any observations? Advice? Input?
Pickup is not about the girl, it is about the GIRLS. My sincere advice for you here is before you see or speak to this girl again, you go and open some sets out in the field and go kino on another girl. Even if it just a palm read, dance, hand hold OR a kiss. You are starting to get one-itis and this will seriously impact your game and cripple your progress with this girl.

Thoughts on your txt convo.
1. Well done on opening (hardest part). Avoid the word "should" in your entire vocabulary. Make a concious effort and wean it out of your vocab entirely. Any sentence that has "should" in it could be said better.

2. 3 txts in a row from you without reply on either is not a good thing. IOD with IOD.

3. Don't seek approval with meeting up. FTC your meetup. Really bad move bringing this owing of a dance into the txt convo. Puts too much pressure on both you and her for the interaction. Let it flow naturally.

4. I like you jogged her emotional memory throughout the chat.

5. This set will be FAR more effective when you bring a female friend (pivot) with you to this public gathering. Invite a few friends that can take care of your pivot for when you open the 10 at the venue. If that's not possible go with your female pivot and open sets there, accomp intro your pivot so she has a set that can keep her company when you game your 10. Merge as MANY sets as you can throughout that night.

Good job, and I really do emphasise the FIRST point that I made.

Peace and Good Luck!
-D


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