how to get this girl to come out on a date with me



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PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 4:19 am 
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so i met this great HB8 at the bar a few weeks ago and we hit it of great. I barley had to use any routine, we just clicked. I couldn't kino escalate her tho, because her guy cousin and guy friend were there. Although, they seem to like me that night. Anyways I sent her a text later that night saying"VIP number, store with care. Hope you got fine." and she replied with "we're actually at denny's grabbing a bite, it was nice meeting you :), have a great night :)". So on Sunday and Monday, we're texting back and forth and she says "you are so funny", then i asked her to come out on Friday to a party but she couldn't make it because she has a bachelorette party to attend and used the "I'll try" line", needless to say she didn't come out or hit me back up. On that Sunday I texted her again small chat and making her laugh ( by the way this girl takes at least 1 hr to respond each time), this time towards the end of our conversation I was direct and a little cocky, and asked "how about dinner with me tomorrow night? check yes or yes". I didn't get a message back till that next morning saying she has a padres game to go to. only this time when I texted "its all good" she replied "next time for sure :)". so i sent her one last text later that night saying "alright Missy....lucky im not that type that gives up so easily....how about this, you give me your secretary's number and I'll set up a date with her sometimes next year maybe? :p alright cancel your plans this Friday i got you better ones....some friends and i are hitting the track at Del mar....hit me up if you can make it" .
there were no replies, is there something wrong? should I just give up? I really like this girl. please help so i can know what avoid next time thank you.


Last edited by samiam_86 on Thu Aug 09, 2012 4:50 am, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 4:46 am 
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Joined: Sun Jun 24, 2012 4:31 pm
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Location: Birmingham, AL
My best guess is that, since you met her at a bar while I assume a little drinking had taken place, and then when you were texting her, she was in different states.

IMO your best best would have been to find a way to hang out first to grow more comfort with eachother. It sounds like she enjoyed your company (bar) and your humor (texts) enough to at least hangout.

Imagine her frame: she meets a random guy at the bar and just a few days later is being asked out on a date without ever having much comfort built in between bar talk and texting

Hope I could help..best of luck man!


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PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 4:52 am 
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Quote:
My best guess is that, since you met her at a bar while I assume a little drinking had taken place, and then when you were texting her, she was in different states.

IMO your best best would have been to find a way to hang out first to grow more comfort with eachother. It sounds like she enjoyed your company (bar) and your humor (texts) enough to at least hangout.

Imagine her frame: she meets a random guy at the bar and just a few days later is being asked out on a date without ever having much comfort built in between bar talk and texting

Hope I could help..best of luck man!
Thank you that helped but how do I ask her to hangout I though going to the party was it lol


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PostPosted: Thu Aug 09, 2012 4:14 pm 
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That was a good idea, but she had something other to do it sounded like.

If she isn't wanting to at least hangout, then you weren't going to get her anyway. Go back and analyze where you could have developed more attraction during the PU.

This has happened to me before man, it sucks. But there's no such thing as failure, just feedback.

Hope she changes her mind!


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PostPosted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 5:17 am 
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Quote:
That was a good idea, but she had something other to do it sounded like.

If she isn't wanting to at least hangout, then you weren't going to get her anyway. Go back and analyze where you could have developed more attraction during the PU.

This has happened to me before man, it sucks. But there's no such thing as failure, just feedback.

Hope she changes her mind!
thanks a lot man that helped :)


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PostPosted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 6:31 am 
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this is what you call a flake man,

go out and meet more women, the first impression is important, if your first impression sucks and you are lacking a connection, you will probably still get the number just for asking, but it will lead to a girl not answering her phone, or it will lead to a texting buddy that never wants to meet you

how do you mitigate this problem to maximize results?

1) maximize your options, the more new women you meet on a regular basis the more you have to choose from

2) screen girls out that are not interested enough

3) try to figure out a good 10 things about the person and their life that you can remember and let them walk away knowing a few things about you, this increases the chance for that connection, that feeling of familiarity and rapport

4) text msg girls less often, just call or text a girl just like you would a guy friend, if it is normal for you to text up your guy friends for no reason other then conversations, go ahead and do so, but if it isn't, do the same, if you call your guy friends just to hang out and that is all, do the same with the girls, if they flake all the time, then your impression is sucking and there is something you need to work on

5) if you notice a girl flakes one time, next time you ask her out, call her, get her on the phone so she can't just not answer questions over text, the next time you invite her out what you do is you bait her into a qualifier, ''are you free today?'' before you ask her out, you can also do this as part of your screening in set before you leave the first time, qualify a girl to a date instead of asking for a phone number, the number will come as a result of a date, and you can set a date and time for the date, and qualify her with, ''are you sure that works for you?, no other plans that day?''

now, back to 2), what are some things to look for when screening?
1- girl willing to invest in the interaction after a sexual frame has been set (she is aware you have sexual interest and continues to want to talk)

2- she allows you to touch her in a meaningful way (can be as simple as hand holding, but she is aware of what you are doing and is compliant)

3- she is willing to be alone with you (can be tested at the venue, or tested after the fact via getting her out on a date, if she flakes in a pattern 3+ times, she does not screen for this one)

if the girl does not screen well for the above ^ it is highly likely she will be a waste of time and is currently unavailable/uninterested in sex with you, you can keep her on the line and slow game it encase she has a boyfriend or something and likes you but can't meet up due to some reason, but it's pretty much a waste of time, much easier to just meet new girls and get new numbers

the more volume of women you meet, the easier the whole process will become for you

also try not to fall in love with every new girl you meet before you have even really got to know them or made out with them, it will make this whole process pretty hard on you emotionally if you invest so much of yourself in every girl

GOOD LUCK


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