My brothers! Some opinions would be appreciated:

I have this HB8 that lives in the same building as I do. Talked to her a couple of times, then one day she was in the elevator and we started talking, went out to take the same tram (Europe) and we ended up going for an instant date that lasted around half an hour. Good connection, conversation, she was smiling, interested, pupils dilated whenever I'd smile and look in her eyes, in the end I #-closed her.

After that I left for vacation and when I got back last week we exchanged some texts. At some point I go:

me: would you like to have brunch on Saturday?
HB8: brunch sounds fantastic but unfortunately I have plans for the whole weekend. but maybe we can have coffee/tea/dinner sometime after work?
me: sure, let me know what day(s) you can make it an i'll make the necessary reservations at McDonalds
HB8: haha, sounds good!
me: well, still checking your agenda?
HB8: monday/tuesday would be good for me
me: ok, monday is also good for me, I'll call you when leaving work around 6

So, not too pushy I think and since she suggested the coffee/dinner thing on her own, I took it as an IOI.

Today I get the following text:

HB8: hi, smileys, blah blah blah, I can't make it today I have an apartment viewing as I'm moving out. Sorry
me: no prob, where are you moving to? i might be able to do tomorrow if you can, but i'll have to get back to you on that.
HB8: i'll be moving to blah blah, not sure about tomorrow, lets talk later

So, uhm, wtf! First she suggests an alternative and then all of a sudden its the definition of a flake? I'm only posting this because it was she who suggested the alternative and it seems kind of strange to flake on her own suggestion and then not go for another alternative.

Am I reading the signs right? Should I just give up or follow-up in some way?

Thanks!

she might truly be busy with shit. or it might be a flake. only one way to find out.
give her some room (meaning, go no contact for a week or so). and then text her back suggesting a meetup.

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nice guys don't get laid
"It's disrespectful not to bang them when they sleepover." (Hellhound)

Would I think would be better is to just leave her alone for a while. If she legit is busy then let her take care of her business then she'll hit you up about going out..If a decent amount of time goes by and you dont hear from her, you know it means shes a flake, she isnt interested, and you should move on.

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On a Mission to be one of the DMV's BEST PUA!!

SPAM id - xhandlessx

so this is my opinion, when a girl flask like that, she prob have soemthing to do,
the only reason is that you r not controlling the whole event, be more bossy, act like ur bussy the whole freacking week, give her a day, and dont give up if that the girl you want man, like really man. as long as you have the kino going on and teh actual date is all good. i recomand dhvs, stores what you did with ur freind etc all the fun you are having, then eventually she gonna be like i wanna do something. and it mean she wanna do it with you. plus i do not think when a girl flake on you it dones mean she not intreset, is because she is not sure who u r, r safe to hang out right.
\ if u need help ask me ill try my best

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God helps those who help themselves.

Flakes can make a man feel frustrated, anxious, and confused, not to mention that can cause low self-esteem.

We usually react according to how we feel.

In this particular case, 2 months ago I # closed 2 HB 9s (different placs and times). Both of them acted very very flirty with me, both of them Hid their Boyfriend and both of them kept making counter offers (and I must say, I invited them once, and they kept the days changing.. "Oh I cant do it tonight (friday) but lets make it saturday.. Oh Im sorry my dog is sick cant make it (lets make it Next wednesday)...".. Yeah, I know

With both those chicks I decided I'd only give it 3 shots. I'd ask her out once, if she flakes and counter offers, that would be second shot, and if she flakes one more time, that's it. Stop sending texting them or calling them and If they text me or callme days later thats ok, if they dont it could mean 2 things:

They're not interested. Simple.
They're interested but not willing to make a move on be (possible ASD)

Regardless of her interest (or lack of) I'd stop it.

I set up my own limit for flakes...

Now, I think you're reading the signs right, but you seem to be far too flexible
...."Still checking YOUR AGENDA?..."
..."Let me know what days YOU CAN MAKE IT...."
..."might be able to do tomorrow if YOU CAN..."

Pushy is nothing to be worried about, but too soft maybe. Do not make the mistake of putting the responsibility of choosing time and place for the date on her shoulders. They don't want to choose. Why dont you choose instead?

If she can't make it the day you want it, suggest another day then (But dont say things like: IF you can, If you have time, You let me know)....

If she doesnt make it or cant, Good for her, probly got something else to do than enjoyin your company.

In a way we are bound by the way we develop attraction. If you developed a strong frame of attraction the first time you two talked then You shouldnt have much problem getting the date soon. But if you didnt build enough attraction she might as well date you just cause you ask her, or keep flaking on you.

After all being nice is not exactly the same than being interested.

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".. I will learn all that I've forgotten, I will succeed where I'd previously failed, and even if I don't I wont stop, cuz this is not just about girls, this is about Life "

I wouldnt say your out yet... but im not super convinced your interaction with her was super great either. I took a girl out on a date1 after 3 other random meet ups of drinking and heavy make out sessions. The date1 went super... and we agreed to meet up again. She flaked on me 3 times after.... but all 3 seemed to be legit like yours. Here is the truth behind the flake. She wants to see you again.... but she doesnt want the pressure of it feeling like a date. Iv actually talked to many girls about this and they have all told me they would rather just watch a movie at their place then go out to dinner / lunch or whatever. Keep it SIMPLE. Act like its not a big deal when she flakes... bc if u get mad she will never go out w you.

But after the 3rd flake i didnt talk to my girl for 2 weeks. She didnt text me either. I re-engaged her with a text and pretended like nothing happened. She instantly re-engaged me and we ended up meeting up at the bars.... making out a ton... and planning another hangout. Had i given up and been pissed about the situation this HB9 would have been gone. U have to roll with the punches... give it some time... but dont give up either. Girls who flake do it sometimes as a shit test. They r testing to see how you are going to react. Thus she said we can do something else sometime. She wants to hang out with you... but it just seems u havnt DHVed enough to her. This is most likly due to the lack of time together and lack of comfort building. I hope this helps! The next time u2 do hang out tho... make sure u make it count!

GL
Duke

Hi guys,

Thanks all for your replies! Seagull, Cheater, AFC Stevie, Bassopens and Dukehoopz your comments are greatly appreciated.

However, I must say that I think I've made it even worse Initially I meant to freeze her out for about a week but then my wing suggested that I follow up with her since yesterday she had said "lets talk later" about tomorrow. And "lets talk later" could mean to actually talk again to arrange it because she just wasn't sure / didn't know if she could make it.

So I went along with that explanation and today sent her a text like:

me: hey, meant to call you yesterday but i went out with a friend and remembered it at around 1am (which is true actually, was out with my wing, also did a good approach). don't want to stay up late tonight but if you're up for something chill and relaxed i know a nice pizza place in with a wood-fire oven

HB8:hi, i'm actually not feeling very well since yesterday. the plan is to go home and be sick

Yikes. I tried to play it cool and reduce the pressure of it being a date like dukehoopz suggested but it seems i now get an even worse flake. I don't know. Only thing I can think of is that during the weekend when she said she had plans she hooked up with someone so now its off.

Needless to say I sent a "feel better soon" message and if this is even recoverable it'll need a freeze-out of more than a week.

Any ideas? Advice?

Thanks again everyone!

go meet some more girls, get dates and try to sleep with them, after there has been a day you don't think about her, followed by a day you remember her, call her (voice to voice) invite her out again, ask her when she is free, ask her what her ideal spot to hang out is, arrange a date to meet her at that spot, ask her if she is sure she is free that day as you blah blah blah (make up a reason), ok cool I'll let blah blah blah know that I'm busy that day

then wait, that day call her to meet her, she flakes, move on, text her once in a while for invites but prioritize her low