Hi guys I was really hoping for some decent advice on this one.

Touched on it in an earlier post but the reason I started looking into the community is because of a recent kinda relationship gone tits up. 

Anyway having read some of these posts it's fairly obvious the mistakes that lead to her dumping me. 

When we first met I wasn't particularly into her and she had (and still has) a long term live in boyfriend so I didn't really have any intentions towards her. In fact we kind of had a friendship / hate relationship cause I used to tease her mercilessly and drive her crazy in a friends only way. 

I'm decent looking and she liked the fact that I'm into martial arts etc so she started to act flirty with me and showing interest.
In the end I decided to just go for it and sent her a text telling her exactly what I wanted to do to her in the middle of a team meeting (the look on her face was priceless lol). 

Anyway she was really into it but I couldn't get past the bf objection so it was just texting each other what we wanted to do and never actually geting down to it. 

Eventually I engineered a few occassions where it did become physical but never full sex. 

Unfortunately in the middle of this I made the mistake of getting emotionally involved an made all the rookie mistakes I.e.

Randomly buying her things
Being too available
Showing too much interest
Asking her how she felt about me
Bugging her to spend time with me all the time
And last but not least
Telling her I was in love with her (cringe worthy I know)

Anyway recently she dumped me.

So finally the question.....

Is their anyway to recover from being such a pussy?

What she loved about me in the first place was the way I excited her and turned her on (her words not mine) but as soon as I got emotionally involved of course I changed into a wuss (my words not hers lol).

I still like her and I'd like to try again but how do you come back from making those kind of mistakes? 

I'd appreciate some good advice here. 

I dont think its a lost cause yet because she still gets really upset with me if I dont make an effort to come over and see her, she still gets jealous if I'm friendly to other girls, she says she wants us to be friends but when I treat her like my other female friends she gets upset and says I'm being cold to her..... 

Anyway guys help a brother out lol

NEXT.

I know this isn't what you want to hear, but this is a classic case of ONEITIS. Drop her and go date other girls. If you still want her after a year, then the new jealousy will play in your favor

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My mPUA pickup journal: mpua-glades-log-of-pick-up-and-life-vt99032.html

Ah come on guys.

I know the easy thing would be to throw in the towel but I actually do really like this girl. Not in a she's my one and only way but because she is genuinely a really cool person.

So apart from writing her off any other tips?

Sooner or later, youre gonna have to cut her off for a while, just to show that youre a busy dude and you have shit to do. Chicks dig guys who are Alphas, meaning guys who have goals, and strive towards those goals.

Work on yourself for a while, dont worry about her and just let her come to you. If she notices your quality of life has gotten better while shes gone, she'll be itching for you.

If she talks to you after this long period of "self improvement", thats when you reset your status as the "bitchman frend" and turn Alpha. you can't be obsessing over one girl, because shes obviously not obsessing over you. Turn the tables, you might just realize shes not as cool as you thought

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~Stay Alpha

That makes sense.

I should have mentioned I work with this girl in the same office about 50 yards away from each other

I've been trying something like that as in not contacting her, taking my time getting back to her when she messages me and, my personal favourite, inviting a female friend that I know she's always been jealous of to lunch near the office at the same pub I used to take her to and arranging to bump into her and introduce them. That seemed to really have the desired effect as she was hanging round my desk for ages afterwards trying to find out why I was inviting a friend out to lunch

Anyway I was hoping for some good tips or routines to run on her to ramp up the attraction? Any ideas?

She still has a live-in, long-term boyfriend, even after all the texting and physical stuff? This isn't going to go anywhere. Move on, there's many a single girl out there.

_________________
You miss 100% of the shots you don't take.

Well even though we were friends for about a year we only started our little fling in January so ..... It's not like I expected her to break up with her boyfriend anyway but I'm still attracted so I thought we could have some fun together

Ah ok, from your original post I thought you wanted an actual relationship with this girl.

Even if it is just some fun you're after, gaming a chick with a boyfriend can be a whole messy affair and might be better to avoid overall. Remember one of the aims of PUA is to leave a girl better than you found her; if you guys do take it further she may end up being wrought with guilt and hate herself especially if her boyfriend is long-term, and you don't want such negativity coming from some of your actions.

_________________
You miss 100% of the shots you don't take.

Her boyfriends kind of a dick and he doesn't exactly treat her well so I don't feel too bad about, plus I'm fairly sure he's cheating on her as they haven't had sex in almost a year.

Frankly I think if we actually did start having sex at least she would see what she's missing out on and that might spur her on to find someone better.

I do appreciate the genuine concern guys but I was really hoping for some game related advice rather then just discouragement

Surely someone on here has some good bf destroyer advice or game they've run on an ex to reignite a spark? Kind of looking to redeem myself and have her chasing me again like she was back in December

For the more moral of you I do actually like this girl so I'm not going to screw her up or stop taking to her etc if and when I have my wicked way.

Gonna bump this as I haven't really had much in the way of advice yet?

Hey my dude,

I'm going to skip the whole moral argument thingy that you shouldn't hit

on a chick who has a boyfriend. I belief that if her

boyfriend is doing a good job then the girl will be literally un-gameable and, wouldn't give you the time of day.

but I guess each case is different and it's best to go with the flow and see where your game lands you.

I don't really get what your intentions are with this girl.
Do you want her to dump her boyfriend and become exclusive with you?
or do you just want her to cheat on her boyfriend and become your Fuck Buddy?
or lastly, do you want her to dump her boyfriend and become your Fuck Buddy?

If you can establish what you want from this girl it'll make your job gaming her heaps easier. Chances of her dumping her "Live-in BF" to just become your fuckbuddy is extremely minimal here, doesn't matter how awesome the sex is. If she is unhappy with him, which you believe, why hasn't she dumped him yet?
I'll tell you why. Some girls just have this phobia of being alone, so till they find a better "dating" option they ain't dumping their current boyfriends. Not to mention the dude she lives with. So if you don't want to date her, then it leaves us with one last option. Her cheating on her BF, with you.

I recently posted an article about, hooking up with girls who are taken.
Once you've established that she's breakable you can continue gaming her like you would game any other girl, get her to comply. Work your way up that compliance ladder (via Kino). The more you get her comfortable with your touch early on the easier she'll be to bang on a later stage.

If I was you I'd continue using jealousy tactics, showing pre-selection by inviting girls over for lunch and all the while you're gaming her at work by being friendly, give her the odd compliment on her hair or style. Then all you got to do is invite her out for a drink after work and continue the seduction.
D.P

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http://realsocialdynamics.com/

Yeah! You can tell what a cool chick she is and worthy of your affection by the fact that she

a. wouldn't dump her boyfriend to be with you
b. presumably (from what I understand of the story) cheated on her boyfriend with you
c. dumped you for opening up to her and trying to build a rapport beyond sex.


You made the mistake of putting yourself in a doomed relationship with a girl who clearly didn't want anything more than a fling with someone other than her boyfriend.

As other guys here have suggested, if this chick is what you really want, the best way to get her is to be with other chicks and show that you had a momentary lapse of judgement but that she really wasn't all that important to you. After all, that's what turned her on in the first place, right? The fact that you're with some new hottie will just turn her on even more.

But personally, I don't think you've lost anything here. Move on.

I will start by saying I'm afc not pua (give me time to build up some skills;) ) but in a similar situation though I had had sex with the woman when she cut things off I went back to banging the last chick I was with the next day or 2 after, who I had given up to be with her, then told her "so she knew instead of found out..." She was p'd and I just put it to her... You broke it off with me because your with him so don't complain! No if's no buts, i gave her the choice if she didn't want me to be with someone else then she had to be with me or deal with it!.. So she opened things back up.. She did complain how quick I slept with the other woman, I just kept putting it to her she broke up with me. She's well aware there are plenty of women I have options on and if she dosent want me I WILL be with them....

So she then has to decide does she want you or not... So get out there, experience life and the women around you. She will be jelous and want you or she won't be interested... You will have company and are getting laid either way and may well meet someone you will want more than her.

_________________
"And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane

by those who could not hear the music"

- Nietzsche

Thanks guys that's really helpful stuff.

Not sure what I want tbh so I guess that's the first thing to address.

Not ready to give up on her just yet etherimp but thanks for the rest of the advice

I do know I want her to want me the way she did back in December, maybe just an ego thing that, and I think everyone deserves great sex and if her bf is busy giving it to someone else then I wanna be the one to step into the breech

Some one mentioned nlp in another thread and I think that she would be particularly saceptible to that because I once made her come in her panties in the middle of the office just by stroking her lower back and whispering nasty things in her ear or as she put it "oh my god you've made me gush" lol

Anyone know anything about that kinda thing? It would have to be the sneaky stuff cause she's shuts me down now if I say anything overtly sexual.

She says she's scared it will start up between us again....