I'm a little (and rarely) unsure how to read into something so I'm looking for other POV's on this surprising situation I have found myself in tonight.

Tonight I was looking for a person on Facebook, and by chance I stumbled across an ex-gf of mine from around 7 years or so ago.

Now, don't ask me why I walked away from this one, I can't give an answer, it was a stupid thing to do, as shes a total keeper, perfect pretty much...but I walked and that was that. However, over the years I found myself thinking about "what if's" with her, and shes the only one thats ever happened with. FTR I know I hurt her when I walked, even though we had only been going out around 4-5 months.

Anyway, I decided to fire a Friend Request, didn't expect to be accepted and really I was just curious if she was single or not. Sent it, thought nothing more of it.

Hour later, request accepted and since then, for the past, 4 hours, we have been chatting and having a good old banter.


Now, aside from the total surprise of being accepted, turns out shes with a guy, seems happy and committed. Honestly I'm happy for her, but I'm wondering why then, would she accept and chat to me for over 4 hours now as if nothing bad had ever happened between us.

Topics of conversation have been pretty random, just like old times, perhaps a "little" flirting, and no mention from her about the past (I thought at first she accepted just to give me a grilling).

Now I have a bit of a moral dilemma....she was really into me when we were together, and now I'm wondering do I want to continue the contact with her and perhaps risk messing up something that shes happy with, or do I just dis-regard the guy and see where (if anywhere) it goes.

He seems to look after her well, and worship the ground she walks on (which is a bit beta) and honestly in terms of looks at least, she can do MUCH better. That said, would I want to be responsible for a mess if it ultimately didn't work out again....

Thoughts please on this one lol

All is fair in love and war. Why is automatic that you think she wouldn't be happier with you? She accepted your request because she likes (as a person) you know each other and it's comfortable. It was probably exciting that you contacted her. In her mind she said wow I can't believe he still remembers me and thinks about me after all these years. You once had a connection she is probably still wondering if it is there. This is fun and exciting after all these years your catching up. The truth will be shown with time, after a month of talking you will be able to tell if she's into you or not. This will either progress or die off. Your reading to much into things right now. If some ex requested you to be a friend after 7 years would you reject it or accept it and be flatter that she still thinks about you after all these years.

Statistically speaking women typically date and have more sex with partners less attractive then them. Women who date a man who is more attractive they will have less sex with because they feel more insecure.

I know she would be happier with me. I don't want to be hard on the guy, he seems to look after her and everything, but he doesn't strike me as too alpha...I think he's the "safe option" for security.

Hmm it would depend on the ex, most I would reject, a couple I would accept...mainly the ones that were fun, that didn't run any really bad shit on me. With her for example, I didn't cheat or was nasty...I just said that I felt it wasn't working out and left. But yeah, you're correct, she's probably flattered and thought it was fun and exciting that I hit her up.

I'll see how it goes over the next few weeks...thanks for the reply