I'm still with this girl that I love butwe have had this on how she still communicates with her ex and everything. Plus a while ago she kissed him while we were together.

Though we're still together, I need to move on. I don't wanna just break up with her while I'm still in love with her. I really have the feeling if I continue this I will end up having a broke heart. So while still being with her I need to do things that will help me be less in love and less involved and when I'm ready to move on without having a broken heart I'll do so.

So I was just wondering things I have to do to make me be less oneits that'll eventually help me break up a lot better, any advice is welcomed.

I know how you feel man, I recently just broke up with a girl that I still had immensely strong feelings for. Sometimes things just don't go the way you want them to and there becomes a point where even though it tears you up, you have to move forward and start a new chapter.

It is tough but it is easier in the long term than living in a unfulfilling relationship. Distance yourself for a couple of days to sort out your head and prioritise the things of importance to you. If a break up is still the thing that you think is right then be decisive and don't look back. Keep your buddies close during this time, you will need them.

A quote from my favourite song that might help :-

"pain's a part of life, don't hide behind your false pride. It's a lie"

Best of luck bro, stay strong and remember it is your life so ultimately you have to do what is best for you and if that is being alone for a while or finding yourself a girl that can better meets your needs then that's the path you need to follow.

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TruthLoveLaugh

i feel for you, man.

just remember, there is no such thing as a clean breakup.

not when true feelings are involved.

like surgery.

quick, sterile, painless.

then get the fuck out of there.

women are not capable of rational thought in these situations.

they either love to death or hate you to death.

there is rarely an inbetween.

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

Don't focus on the fact that she cheated on you too much, that may make up part of your love for her, because you see her as desirable.

I would Write a list of how your life has improved as a result of this relationship.
This might seem silly at first, but when you look at how you've benefited and what you've learnt from your time together it eases the pain slightly.
It promotes the idea that your relationship is in the past and that you see the relationship as having a positive impact on your new life.

This may sound strange as well, but I feel you have the 'wrong' mentality for the anticipated pain.

Welcome the pain, and utilize it. Take a SPAM and James Bond attitude to it. Use it to drive and motivate you to do positive things like self-improvement or give you that bit extra in your career.

This will now be part of your life and a story that will make another girl, the one (if you believe in such a thing), endear to you.

Think about what you will tell your children if you were the dad on How I Met Your Mother. Do you want to tell them that daddy moped around for weeks on end achieving nothing? or that daddy took a fall and picked himself up even better than he was before. Take a role model attitude.

You may not want kids, you may not like SPAM or James Bond, but when my ex broke up with me, these were the things that brought me back to real life and out of that depressive state that you can often get in. I hope this helped in someway.

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Find enlightenment through heeding many points of view.
Find ignorance through heeding few.
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Don't worry about this over-used term known as "oneitus". Your prediction of how you will end up left with a broken heart may very well be true. My suggestion is break up with. The fact of the matter is she crossed a predefined boundary in your relationship by kissing her ex-boyfriend. This is not acceptable. The outcome is inevitable, you might as well get out now be sad for a bit but in the long run save yourself quite a bit of heartbreak.

Go travelling!

That actually is a very good idea!

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Do not make external things like girls define your happiness or you will live a harsh life. Keep doing what you love and keep improving as a man.

Each person is different. But in a totally fucked up situation like yours, my instinct is to go back to a full contact karate gym where you spar with 20 to 30 guys for one minute each a session.

It's anger management which calms you down. This way when you sarge other girls, you have a vibe that says you're neutral and you don't hate women. Women unconsciously sense when you're a woman-hater because of situational factors like the one you're in right now.

Love and hate are the same thing, physiologically speaking. One way to eject is to manage the hidden anger so you can find better options and have better than average success rates.

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Approach. Open. Escalate. Isolate

Here are my two essential rules on texting that will save you tons of time and money:

general-questions/topic137931.html

I Just broke up with my girl

I am so fucked up man :/

Sorry to hear that, buddy. It's never easy. If you want some advice or want to talk things over, feel free to make a new topic on these forums.

Haha, same here. I'm stilling trying to move on. =/

Broke up with my gf...yesterday...but it was for the best she was also disrespectful...a liar...with a whole host of personal issues which impacted our relationship...truth be told I have emotionally detached some time ago...but still felt a small fear of loss that someone would pick her up before I got a new woman...but to be honest she won't change she had a past that she consealed before she meet me...so it is for the best....I just try and think of all the ways of disrespect in order to keep my self moving forward and away from her...

Makes me sick the things I put up with...

All Hail Cobra-La

Have a month of no contact.
Give her the gift of missing you.

Fill your time up with your mates, and if you have a female fuck buddy or friend with benefits use them. Rebounds also help deal with it although can often cause a lot of shit.

It's a time for change, work towards something to keep your mind off it.
Travelling is a very good idea.

The relationship you *have* is dead. It will never be the same no matter what, and that's what we always hang onto. Consider if it is worth holding onto and if not brak up with her before she does to you since it is always the person who has least control who freaks out/ hurts the most.

After the no contact remember that If you get back with her understand it is a new relationship you will never get the old one back. You are already both two different people from when you were together due to the experience of the break up. She is not the same girl that you have feelings for now and won't be later. Perhaps you may even love the new her even more after she has time to gather new experiences herself.