This is a facebook convo i had between me and an hb i had made out with at a playground at a resort in mexico at about 1am, It'll talk alot about someone named carlos, who is my little cousin who became friends with her little brother. Can you guys please critique this conversation and tell me what I need to work on?

PS you guys will recognize alot of lines i learned here used in the convo lol

me
oh hey there miss cruz
you left without sayin bye lol

hb
hey lol , u found me lol ..im not soo good with goodbyes lol

me
lol well carlos did
i just thought it be nice to get to know the girl raped me against my will that night ;D

hb
hahha , ohh im pretty sure it was the opposite and beside what happens in cabos stays in cabos lol ..

me
haha more like what happens in the playground stays in the playground
too bad we met last day
we woulda had fun

hb
omggg , lol ur just reminiscing there eh?
lol

me
of course
cus normally when i talk to girls
i faint in like 5 seconds
i guess your just an exception ;D

hb
umm , hahaha sure thats not what carlos tell me
told*

me
lol so remind me again what i did when i was drunk
cus all i know is i woke up with blood on my shorts

hb
you woke up with blood on your shorts LOL?
thats wackkk lol

me
lol i thot i had finally gotten my period
but sadly
apparently i fell in a bush

hb
yes you did lol i was there to witness that hahaha
hahah whaat your a girl hahahhaha ,,, that craze but then again i could tell when i saw your boobs
haahaha

me
haha of course
only in cabo do you get to makeout with a girl
haha god you mustve been so attracted to me when i fell in that bush werent you?

hb
hahaha , yeahh so attractive you know ... never seen anyone play basketball drunk before

me
lol well you see
i thought i was doin pretty good
haha but carlos told me otherwise

hb
told you what you sucked ha! jk jk lol

me
really? i thought missing the basket and falling on your face meant you were pro
i was misinformed :{

hb
lol , yeahhh hahaha it was more if you got the basket in it would of been better lol ,.. its k two 13 year oldsbeat you hahaha
carlos is the one that looks like my brother right?

me
haha yea
but my i had such a crappy teammate
lol all she did was sit in a chair and make fun of me

hb
i wasnt your team mate you drunkie lol .. it was the egyptian dude lol

me
shit...lol i was trashed
i forgot he existed
hahaha

hb
hahha awwe
he was the strange one that tryed to fit in with the filipinos lol

me
oh yeaa
haha honestly i didnt think you were filipino at first
you look more viet or chinese
actually you were pretty pale
compared to you we looked like we were black lol

hb
Hahaha omg ur so mean i wasnt that pale lol .. And hahhaa yaaa ppl always think im chinese or viet lol

me
nah your the mean one remember?
im super nice ;D

hb
I dont recall being mean to you lol

me
"wow you have like no muscle in your arms"
(says the girl who wouldnt stop feelin me up ;D

hb
Hahaha , ok there buddy you were the one feeling me up .. Couldnt even make the first move ehh?

me
nah i like teasin almost as much as you do
i was just deciding to see if you were worthy ;D

hb
Hahaha , i think u should check yourself cause your not very good at it LOL

me
eh theres always room for improvement
any tips master? (:

hb
Hahaha , i gotta say im perfect jk lol

me
someones humble lol

hb
I was kidding ive just always been told that .. Not knowing why

me
really? lol
i only compliment girls when they deserve it (;

hb
Yaaa LOL .. Care to explain?

me
well it normally costs 7$ everytime a girl touches me
but since you were cute i let it go for free

hb
Wow you come cheap eh haha .. Just kiddin lol
Awwe your too sweet

me
well hey in this ecomonomy every dollar counts
and see? you sorta deserved it

hb
Hahaha well i it counts if i saw u i would think u were work at 5 grand lol
If*

hb
Sorta lol?

me
haha ;D
well yea but beauty is common
your either born with it or you buy it
what do you have goin for you besides your looks? (:

hb
Hahaha , umm my bubbly personality?

me
well what really counts is a good energy, outlook and personality
1/3 aint bad ;D

hb
Hhahha , ok lol .. Im athletic and im good to role with
Im pretty sure im the whole package LOL

me
really? haha such confidence
how do people roll with you? lol

hb
Well im just so chill yeah know hahahaha

me
normally i'd make you prove it
but i guess i can make an exception

hb
Lol im pretty sure im one of the few girls that drive manual and know how to drive a motor cycle

me
oh so talented
i think i'll let you kiss me again
but just once can't get too greedy ;D

hb
Hahaha na ill have to turn down the kiss lol ,

me
i said i'd LET you lol
never asked for one

hb
Hahaha i wouldnt give IT to you LOL .. I like to play hard to get the second time around

me
You seem pretty fun lol

hb
Lol awwe ive been told

me
maybe when i visit my cousins in canada we can set up a little "second time around"
see how well that teasing works out

hb
Hahaha , cute .. But i think you should just come visit me here hahaha .. And ill how you how much fun i am lol

me
maybe we'll see
if you prove yourself i just might fly up there to visit you
since i have free flights and all who knows

hb
What lol you get free trips,
?? Lol do you flirt with flight attendants or what ???

me
totally ;D
but i flirt with the captain too cant discriminate genders eh?

hb
Hahaha lol awwe u just made my day lol, but actually how?

me
my mom used to be a flight attendant
now she works as the sales manager for continental
so one of the benefits is that i fly pretty much anywhere for free

hb
Ohh lol sweet if u stop by bring me a horse from texas lol

me
oh definitely

hb
Why dont you just travel then?

me
then we'll ride it around the city
i do lol
i've gone pretty much anywhere you can think of

hb
Lol .. Man i gotta say for a bad ass like me ive never rode a horse before
Really dominican republic?

me
actually that one wasnt free
haha but it was a nice reort though
resort*
the bars are open til midnight
come on try me

hb
Russia ?

me
LOL somewhere with something fun xD

hb
The beaches there are omggg .. To nice
Spain

me
yup lol
well i may have had a layover in moscow

hb
Omgg have u been to there nude beaches

me
the only downsides to flying free is that you fly standby
hhaha i went there when i was 12

me
You wait for open seats right?

me
pretty much

hb
Hahaha omg they have some fine woman in spain ngl

me
no doubt lol

hb
Lol yaaah hahaha

me
but out of everywhere in europe
i gotta say amsterdam
funnest place ever

hb
Never been there

hb
Ive been to spain
Ive been to paria
Paris

me
i assume you went to the nude beaches? ;D

hb
Hahahha omg yessss
Italy
Ive travelled as well lol

me
oh nice so we're somewhat alike (;

hb
If u ever have the chance to go to dubai .. There structural buildings are fabulous

me
cept for the fact that im cooler than you ;D
ohh dubai? that place is insaneeeee
everything is so expensive though
but its soo cool lol
carlos used to live in dubai

hb
Really lol, i know except the veiw is so worth is LOL

me
haha those islands!

hb
Haha never go to south korea .. Trust me urghhh ur like a prisoner

me
hahaha you've been there?
i heard its fun if your white xD

hb
Yeaaah lol no !!
Theres legit only one hotel there
With cameras in the hotel room LOLOL

me
lol what???

hb
And you cant leave with out assistance ahahhaha

me
i guess their pretty kinky in korea xD
im pretty sure theres more hotels

hb
Lolol hahhaha i only saw one lol
Where else have u been?

me
what was a filipino like you doing in south korea anyways?
lessee
have you been to cabo?
its in mexico
its really nice

hb
Haha yeaaah foreign guys there areee hottt lol
Haha there beaches terrific

me
hahaha you gotta go to playa del carmen
thats where all the european swimsuit models go
male and female

hb
Lol hahaha u would know

me
i would ;D
but foreals
they straight up ONLY wear banana hammocks
no lie

hb
Was that beside our hotel .. You never told me that

Hey mate,

i would say this is a good example of cocky/funny. You played it good i would say. I think she is still in to you, because the conversation has no real conversational value (except for the jokes) but sure enough she sticks around. Also, you statement of interest was good, straight ahead. She does play it a bit hard to get, but i think she is just mirroring your pushing and pulling /qualifying.

She seems like she is confident about herself, and she even soft flirts back, which tells me that she is into a bit of adventure, excitement. Great!

THere is one thing though, and that is that the conversation is not going sexual. I think you could have created more interest if you started flirting a bit more sensual. Subtle ofcourse, but with a very sexual demeanor. I think there was room for that in the convo. Oh well, next time i guess .

Good job though.

cheers!

_________________
"Stop being a fucking vagina and escalate" - CaptainJackHarkness

Like the naked leads the blind.
I know I'm selfish, I'm unkind.
Sucker love I always find,
Someone to bruise and leave behind.
placebo - every me, every you

Thanks LD!

Next time I'll try what you suggested and make the conversation a little more sexual, and try to get the convo to have a more sexual vibe. Do you have any tips by the way for making the conversation a bit more sensual especially with her playing so hard to get? I feel as if this is a trend with me for all girls and may be my sticking point :/

All in all thanks for the advice I'll keep you guys updated on the progress!

Sure mate,

What you need to know before we continue: You already know this girl, and you kissed her. so you are pretty sure that she will respond positive to more sensual teasing and flirting.

However, some women might not respond positive to this. then you need to take a step back or consider to not continue at all.

the next thing is something that should be seen at moving borders. at first, when you meet a stranger (and you are not going all the way direct game) you say hi. you introduce. after the introduction, it is like you have conquered that terrain already. There is no way back. suppose you continue and you start asking a bit more personal questions, like: what is your biggest dream and why? when you get an answer, you have 'conquered' the next level. You might want to ask about something very personal. If you get an anwser, you have gone to the next level. there is no way back! You know that persons on a very deep level, and unless time passes by and the friendship fades, it will always be like that.

With flirting/pua it is the same. If you are not going direct instantly, go gradually more and more sensual. If you didnt go sexual from the start and all of a sudden: KABOOM!! you are not being congruent towards her. It will seem awkward.

So, when you get a girl to kissing you, you have already 'conquered' that level. There is no way back, she cant unkiss you. she can regret it, but i think the conversation would be over very soon . you would know. So, you start slowly and sensually, nto all that plain in the face sexual, and you amp it up! if you see resistance, take a step back, or two steps and try again.

Now, flirting is done by saying something sensual/sexy/sexual but make it impossible because of some barrier. For example: i would totally kiss you in your neck but that is kinda not done in this restaurant.

I hope you feel what i mean with this 'barrier' thing. a barrier is something abstract, some rule (dont matter if it is a real rule or something you made up) or some context wich makes it impossible to do what you just said. Another example: I would rip your clothes off here in this bar, but we cant do that, as today naked people are not allowed in here! some silly stuff like that. it doenst have to sound cool, but you will feel the tension rise if she catches on. That means, if she is using your barrier of finds another one to do about the same!

Every once and a while, you will have girls that take what you say literally. honestly, i think i would reallly really exaggerate it, until they get along. When i see she is still pleasantly confused, i ll tell her i dont mean it (and make a mental note to eject if she keeps playing dumb). if she starts getting uneasy, take a step back or reconsider your target.

Ok and now some example. i am going to take your convo and rework it a bit. Parts of it though .

here we go:

you: - i just thought it be nice to get to know the girl raped me against my will that night ;D (i thought this to be a very good line )

she: hahha , ohh im pretty sure it was the opposite and beside what happens in cabos stays in cabos lol ..

you: the opposite!? no no no!! Clearly i was powerless! Overpowered by that amazing body pressing me against that wall. With lips screaming "kiss me now!!!!" what could i do?

her: omggg , lol ur just reminiscing there eh?

you: yeah!! hehe, but you surely meant: what happens on the playground stays on the playground!

her: yeah, that is cool as well

you: because if it wasnt for the resort nightwatch crawling around... i know a lot more games we could have been playing on that.. play-ground

her: really... hmmmm you arent talking about... hide and seek now are you? ( supposing she is playing along )

you: no no no, hide and seek is what we would play if the nightwatch is getting too close . i was thinking more about... tag... with my lips... but we cant do that! I faint in like 5 seconds when i play lip tag... i guess you must have been an exception!

her: sure!! that is not what carlos told me!

you: well, what did he tell you?

her: well, that you like to play... hide and seek with your tongue? Ofcourse we couldnt do that on day one, we hardly know each other!

you: .. oh really? Carlos said that? shit... i knew he found my stack of playground porn! But he is right! I also like to combine the seeking with my hands... but ofcourse we cant do that, because naked adults on a playground arent allowed! you can go to jail for that!

her: yeah, you are right!! looks like we will need to find that room where the eldery play bingo

you: Woooh Bingo already? Darn girl, you are nasty, hehehe. As long as you dont sink my battleship to darn deep

her: what?

you: nevermind, that is a game played later on the evening. yeah, if i would play hide and seek wiht my hands... i think i would start with... your back and slowly going down... while i work with my lips on your.... neck... trying to hide my tongue somewhere...

her: oooh, well, my hands would also start at your back, going for your.. neck hehehe. while my lips start at your.. lips, going down. But i am not sure what i am going to hide...

etc etc et

what i am trying to say with the last two blocks is, taht one way of flirting is gradually telling her what you would do and amp it up. there is no barrier anymore here, but i think i gave enough barrier examples from the top of my head.

I hope these can help you a bit to understand the idea. If hyou have more questions, shoot!

cheers and good luck amigo!

_________________
"Stop being a fucking vagina and escalate" - CaptainJackHarkness

Like the naked leads the blind.
I know I'm selfish, I'm unkind.
Sucker love I always find,
Someone to bruise and leave behind.
placebo - every me, every you

I see what you mean!

I never thought of it in that way thanks a bunch! I can't wait to try it out next time I talk to her or any other girl. This is gonna help so much
Lol and I really like the "Clearly I was powerless" line! If only i knew that before talking to her. Hopefully this gets me over my sticking point and helps me create a more sexual vibe for me and the girls.

My only question at the moment is how do I go about talking to this girl if she doesn't play along, or i guess plays hard to get or shit tests me still? I mean I like her confidence, but how would i break through her barrier? Should i neg her and exaggerate a bit more? Or should take a step back build some more rapport and try to escalate again?

Once again thanks so much! And I'll post the next conversation between me and her to show you how I'm doing

Well, this is the hardest part, largely because it aint in real life and you cant see her reaction in real life.

Maybe she just thinks its awkward. You will see it very quickly in the conversation, she give you short answers, and not really give input anymore. Step back and try again later. If she doesnt initiate contact anymore, i would say she doenst really see things like you see them. NEXT!!! You gotta be honest here towards yourself. your gut feeling will telll you: this is wrong. Follow your gut feeling like a real man and NEXT!!!

Maybe she does like it but doesnt really know how to play it. In this case, her input might be more in the form of emoticons. not much input either, but still happy faces. I dont really like these women, those who cant seem to give their own input but clearly like what you say. it 's like they dont have any fantasy or imagination. they are lousy/boring sex partners (in my experience) and they dont seem to understand this feeling of lust. Still, perhaps they dont realize they can give input as well (this might be! perhaps she thinks that you will think bad of her!) and can try to encourage her to play along. You can do that by asking for example: "hey, these are all my games, games i like to play. I am sure you know some games we are totally not allowed to do here?"

Some will bluntly say they just dont feel like that about you. Praise yourself then, because it saves a lot of time and effort. Step down and create some comfort. She will not change her mind, but i do value people like these, who are not afraid to speak their mind. I usually park myself in the friend zone, if possible.

There will also be girls who seem a bit hesitant and shy about this sensual thing. Step back, try again later. You are still game if they stick around. Usually, nothing much changes in the following interactions. Sometimes they start a convo, sometimes you start one, but as soon as you go sensual, they seem to shut down a bit. step back and try again .

this is advice from my point of view. I think that the most worthwhile advice would be: calibrate. Learn how to calibrate. Measure her response and take action along. But on the other hand, dont be afraid to admit that you lost somebody. Some people believe that they can change a persons mind, so they try different stuff and eventually making a fool out of themselves. But you cant unsink a ship with a whole in its bottom.

Dont try to break her confidence . Let her play hard to get. This is what i mean with looking at the general context of an interaction. People say a lot of things, but their actions actually say something totally different. Like Freud said (i think it was him anyway): no man can keep a secret. if his lips are sealed tight, his body does the speaking.

If she says: i am hard to get/i dont know if would want that/ are you sure i would let you kiss me/ etc, but she still hangs around, she still initiates contact, etc etc, then her words and her actions are not really congruent. I make this look like it is the simplest thing in the world, trust me, it isnt always this simple. If she gives you bullshit, but she hangs around until you end the conversation, that is a good sign.

Usually, when she shittests me, i just go along with it. Example:

me - i feel like making out wildly, but we would scare the old folks here!
her - really? Hmm, well, i dont know if i would let you do that....
me - oh really? Darn, that is a shame! THen i think i ll just stroke your back when the nurses aren't looking... going from one cheek to another.. i mean going cheeky.
her - haha, but i hate guys who are all touchy fast!
me - oh shit, i think i will be number one one your hate list! The things i had in mind doing... phew!! I dont think we really match....
her - uhm, oh, wait wait!
me - well bye! its a shame though! i really was starting to get fond of you!
her - no no, hahaha, wait!

Basically, when you face a shit test like this, she is provoking you into saying stuff that you dont mean, and consequently act totally the opposite way. So what i usually do is to put the test on her! is she congruent? would she take the consequences of what she is saying? So i go along with the test and i even might playfully qualify her, by saying:" oh really? you hate such guys? Darn, pitiful me cause i like sensual women, i like passionate, wild women with a notch of adventure. Oh well, clearly you are not meant for me . Ciao!"

Always say it playfully. And yes, you risk everything.

BUT BE WARNED THOUGH!!! you need to stick to your guns as well!! If you shittest her, and you say 'bye' and she doesnt stop you, you need to leave the conversation! And hell, you should leave! because she is clearly not into you! What you say and what you do need to convey the same message, that is what she is testing you for! And dont be a douche, leave the convo just to re initiate contact the next day, or the day after that. You dont start a convo, never again with that girl! If she did like you, she will contact you eventually. It might take some time though, but dont fretter and wait for it . And if she does... KABLAMO, you are in for a score! escalation is your friend then . if she doesnt, NEXT!! she dont feel that way like you do.

Putting the test on her, going along with her shittest or qualifying her is all the neg you should give. Negging her in any other way, would feel like you arent that confident like you would show you are. it would look like a feeble attempt to protect your pride. If she plays hard to get but doesnt leave the convo, just escalate. Dont exaggerate. Exaggeration at this sensual/sexual game makes you look like a child. Flirting is also showing what is going on for you in a sexual way. Dont be into kidstuff .

I think that is about it. If you got more questions, fire!!
please do!

good luck and ciao amigo!

_________________
"Stop being a fucking vagina and escalate" - CaptainJackHarkness

Like the naked leads the blind.
I know I'm selfish, I'm unkind.
Sucker love I always find,
Someone to bruise and leave behind.
placebo - every me, every you