They are pretty good, though I'm wondering about the 2nd and 3rd one. If I got a text like that from a girl, I would be disgusted with her and ignore her... do you think women will react differently to these because they have less of a power complex than men? I would like to know if any of you have gotten good results using some of these lines which are blatant insults.

Retard and lil buddy... seriously? Hard to find the humor in that for me. Maybe a woman would react differently. Let me know if this is the case

Whenever she's being negative - ''is buzz killing ___(subject)___ your new thing now?"

A good side step that worked for me.

I agree, some of the examples in the list are rather desperate.

The retard thing I guess depends on what kind of humour you have. If you're more towards the absurd like me it can work.

_________________
Sidney: "A man should never act desperate. It's impractical. And frankly, I find it rather ugly."
Billy: "I'd rather look ugly and win than ..."
Sidney: "Shut the fuck up."
(White Men Can't Jump)

girl: remind me where are you from?
me: from the moon, i just came to earth for a visit..
girl: how is it so far?
me: well actually, I came to pass a message that aliens are coming to abduct all the sexy girls in the world.. you'll be safe..

that's how you do it

Just for Shits and giggles I used the Alien one 5 minutes ago, here it is:

Heywood:
Girls r silly LOL! Hey btw Aliens are coming to abduct all the good
looking sexy ass people! You will be safe, I'm just sayin I may be
gone for a few! LOL

HB:
Rofl!!!! Yip, I will be safe (she then sends me a new pic in a spaghetti strap dress)


Heywood:
Just saw ur pic! Maybe you won't be that safe, but just be careful
if you hear anything that sounds like "anal probe" LMAO!

HB:
Lmao!!!!!!!!

_________________
They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

OH MY GOD this is exactly what i've been looking for. this thread should be stickied. I will be trying this on two girls tomorow.

sent out the aliens 1an hour ago. still no luck on it

So I said

Me:You just popped into my head so Hi...now please stay out of there
Girl: but why would you want me to stay out?


What is something to say here?

I was talking to a girl and I came with this one:

HB7:how about u, u seeing anyone?or, should i say, how many ppl are u seeing lol
ME: im not seeing anyone, wait! just myself in the mirror
HB7:y not?
ME:does that count?
HB7:lol...silly


I think was a pretty good one.

This is an amazing topic, KUDOS!

_________________
Just play, have fun. Enjoy the GAME.

To be honest, I would use that one when I have attraction with her. Did u build enough attraction?

_________________
Just play, have fun. Enjoy the GAME.

Hey guys.

Used this recently:

I just made you open your phone for no reason...looks like I got you in check =] (but facebook version)

She took almost a day to respond something like:

"When someone has nothing to do, just pull inventions. "
(hope I'm not lost in translation)

I have a response ready... but I'm not pulling it right away, i'll make her wait first. But for my curiosity, what would be your responses?

Just read Heywood's link to this thread...

ALL of it is subjective and depends on personality-type, attitude and countenance of the target... Calibrate and go for it.

I use the word "fuck" OFTEN when meeting a chick. I show a comfort with it and defend it's grammatical prowess if questioned - it's a fucking strong routine. Some, I re-calibrate and see she's not turned on by the word...

Retard? The chick that I feel comfortable enough calling retard in text will be a chick I want to see a LONG time... she's cool, and 'gets it'. Humor is just that - humor. NO politics/ethics stop me from laughing when shit is just funny.


...........

I'm going to text the "alien" one to 3 diff HB's now. I'll post responses after I get back from the beach....

RR

_________________
Women are like ceramic tile.... if you do the prep work, and lay them properly the first time...you can walk all over them for years to come.

Okay dudes...listen:

Text messaging is a tool, That wrench is not going to fit every fucking nut and bolt it is not a be all end all fix all!

Girls are moody and emotional; Text has no mood or emotion, so it should always be light and humorous, or short, direct and straight to the point!

You never know when you send out a random text, if she's on the rag, her cat just got hit by a car, or she just smoked a big fatty, then used her shower head to get off!

If you send out in this example the "Alien" opener BE PREPARED WITH MULTIPLE RESPONCES

If you are not prepared....you'll be dead in the water!

If you do not have a response....don't fucking hit send!

Read the entire thread to see the varied replies

FIRST!

_________________
They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

HB8 (ginger I hit last night): Hardee har har!
me: I looked at your pics again - you'll be there. Start packing.
HB8: [sends a pic]
me: Smitten. That's a good word.
HB8: Why yes, yes it is. Smitten Kitten.
me: Smitten by your sore, red, puffy, tasy, pretty kitten...
HB8: Pleasantly sore and well pleased.
me: You're welcome.




HB7 blonde I hit last week: You don't think I'm going?
me: I don't make the decisions. Have you received notice yet?
HB7: you r funny, but not HA HA funny
me: You're cute when you pout. Now they'll invite you. Start packing.
HB7: Kiss my ass
me: OK, tonight, let's feed turtles and kiss ass.
(I told her to call and stop by later...)



HB8 redhead I hit Sunday: That makes me sad
me: It's OK, I'm being taken by aliens seeking men who are assholes first.
HB8: you arent an asshole merely misunderstood
me: You had me at hello...
HB8: call me. i want to see you tomorrow.
me: Swamped, can call after 10 or we can meet at noon at XXXXXX?
HB8: see you then. x o


I found it ironic the first one sent me a pic, kinda like Heywood's... I was thinking "Cool, I hope the all do"... I had to back out of the last one - she was sensitive and I didn't want to push. Good to learn that about her. Her sense of humor isn't where I want it to be...

This was fun.

RR

_________________
Women are like ceramic tile.... if you do the prep work, and lay them properly the first time...you can walk all over them for years to come.

Qualify: Girl, if you had a like button, i would definantly click that shit

Who is this response: (field tested)

her: who is this?
me: george bush, i actually text 21 yr old girls now
her: haha
me: wow..the former president and thats it??
her: no i actualy like you more than obama
me: confession not george bush
her: oh so who are you
me: blablabla


I have a question read this ENTIRE POST and i think i want to use this one.

me: i just saw a girl puke and it reminded me of you.

how do yall feel about this one? i duno why everyone is using the alien one so much btw i think it's lame.

_________________
there is no turning back. there is only winning