I've been talking to this girl and I've been getting IOIs and we talk alot but when I suggest meeting up she always becomes a bit of a flake. Logistics aren't great but I've asked her a few times. Do you think I should say something like 'Stop being a big vanilla flake and meet up otherwise I'm not going to speak to you again' or is that being too harsh.

I think you have two options.

The first is to just stop asking her and go on your own way.

The second is to very firmly, but not angrily, simply state that you are someone who values plans and so you just want her to know that if she expects to be in your life, you'll need her to be more forthcoming in that way. And then you have to be prepared to enforce that if she doesn't accept your expectation by basically doing what I said in the first choice.

If this is your view of what is respectful, enforce it either with or without making that clear in a reasonable way.

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With girls who flake on me i usually get them to agree to another date at some point in time. Then i tell them "don't flake on me". This is a powerful statement cus you are calling them out on their bullshit. This will decrease flakes.