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Only one time since going direct have I continued the interaction for a long time (and that eventually went sour, but that's a different story), every other time I have gotten blown out usually.
I went into the deli today and saw this really cute blonde working. She was giving me the eye a bit, but there was a lot of people in the place ordering and she was working. As I'm waiting for my food she happen to be in the corner and to the side away from most of the people for a tiny bit. It might not have been that natural because I was thinking about it for a little bit beforehand, but at that opportunity I gave the 'fuck it!' and went ahead and approached.
"hey.. girl!... I know youre probably busy, but I have to say I think you are adorable.. like crazy adorable"
"Thank youuuu" ...
and I could tell she lost any interest she had. She kind of walked off after that.
Now, I haven't been practicing a lot, and maybe the 'crazy adorable' was a little too far, especially because I think my body language wasn't the greatest at that part..(head was a little down when I said that) but fuck! Why does this stuff, which is supposed to be simple, seem so hard sometimes?
I understand that looks aren't everything.. but man, I cannot believe that I still see chumps with some of these beautiful women and I can't seem to find one for me. I am a guy who is definitely more intelligent than a good portion of the public. I am really passionate about surfing, I like to snowboard, lift, I've mountain climbed. Oh yea, I go riding, paintball, I care about my future. I swim on the swim team at my college.
In general, I have a pretty packed lifestyle. Don't get me wrong, I have hook ups here and there.. but that's about it. And most of that came from being in a fraternity last year. Now I am going to be ocean life guarding again this summer, and I don't want to add pressure to anything, but I do want to make stuff happen!
Are a lot of you guys going direct and its working? It's pissing me off that I can have some of these good looking girls eyeing me up, and then I'm not capitalizing on these opportunities. I'm holding myself back?
Thanks for any advice any of you can give me.
PS. Maybe because I kind of know what I am going to say..even though its 'direct'.. its still technically a 'routine'?
If you still have any comment on looks you got some things to learn. The value of someones attraction can be a number of things: Looks, social value, economic value, type, personality(confidence, good sense of humor), smell, and movement. Anyone of those things can make a woman attracted to a man. Normally a man that doesn't meet the correct value physically meets it in other ways.
Your language pattern is extremely submissive. Stop using the word I so much, that is a sign of a beta male.
"hey.. girl!... I know youre probably busy, but I have to say I think you are adorable.. like crazy adorable"
You need to also leave room for her to talk.
Revised: "Hey girl, you look busy, just felt obligated to come introduce myself. You look adorable, I'm Victor."
Then reach out to extend your hand for a welcoming hand shake and she will say her name. You just assume she will introduce herself and she almost always will.
I highly recommend going with a compliment if you want to go direct. That doesn't mean to walk up and say "I like your shoes." It's about learning to give a good compliment. This means learning to give the why with the compliment as well as say it differently.
"Love your choice on the kicks, the color compliments your outfit perfectly."
If you don't have the body language nothing you say will work, anytime you place a woman above you with your body language she will agree with you. If you don't show confidence in yourself why should she confidence in you. A woman can tell whether you are high value by the value you assign yourself, so you need to change your mind to have high confidence and value.
If you'd like you can click my alpha video in my signature that should help with your body language as far as showing confidence.
Now on to your approach body language, it shouldn't be to direct body language wise, your body language should be nonthreatening to go with your confidence. This is an article I wrote on the body language you should have when approaching a woman
http://showyourmind.wordpress.com/2012/ ... -approach/ . Here is a article I wrote about The Perfect pick up body language wise
http://showyourmind.wordpress.com/2012/ ... t-pick-up/ , so you don't end up over responsive.
Note: Nothing cost money dude, I'm not here to pedal useless gimmicks. So don't think that I'm trying to sell shit.
There are also some articles on opening women and complimenting if you need any help. There is also an article on what makes a man attractive. I don't want to post any more links because I don't want to pollute the forum.
And yes you are holding yourself back with a poor approach, you are illustrating yourself poorly to start and while you can recover from a bad approach, you better have some game. Fix your body language, your opening needs to have more you's than I's in it and needs to evoke a response that isn't just thanks or thank you. It's not hard to capitalize on attraction with a decent opening but you do need to make it interesting, not the same as the last 10 guys who tried talking to her.
CHAT
Doing this will make you more comfortable with the approach, and your direct approaches will become more fun, conversational, and natural.
