I can speak with authority that I have seen this work with my own eyes.This is as true as hammers drive nails.

If my hair color is brown and I keep telling myself that its really blue ...will it change color? Same thing with affirmations. You can delude yourself all you want but you will have to keep lying to yourself to keep the ball rolling. This can be a short term solution but its much much better to accept your fears/anxieties for what they are and move on.....

If my hair color is brown and I keep telling myself that its really blue ...will it change color? Same thing with affirmations. You can delude yourself all you want but you will have to keep lying to yourself to keep the ball rolling. This can be a short term solution but its much much better to accept your fears/anxieties for what they are and move on.....

If my hair color is brown and I keep telling myself that its really blue ...will it change color? Same thing with affirmations. You can delude yourself all you want but you will have to keep lying to yourself to keep the ball rolling. This can be a short term solution but its much much better to accept your fears/anxieties for what they are and move on.....

But its better to have your own affirmations so that you can rely on yourself. Its time out for listening to parents and teachers and friends. Its time to listen to yourself. Not music, yourself. Believe what you want to believe, follow your own rules, have your own orders and direct your drives.

To overcome approach anxiety, fear of rejection and rejection itself you want a strong mind in the activity of courtship. A strong mind thinks, a strong mind feels “I will overcome.” I will overcome, I will overcome is the attitude of a strong mind. I will succeed is the attitude of confidence. I will persevere, I will endure is the attitude of toughness. We want a strong mind, that is confident going into courtship and is tough no matter the outcome of approaches. Once we get a strong mind in the activity of courtship we can develop discipline. Discipline is when you can do what you want to do no matter how you feel about it. You get discipline by practice, by practice and repetition until your style becomes a strong habit. When your style has become a strong habit nothing can stand in your way because your instincts, from within, push you to do what you want to do.

The obstacles that stand in our path to obtaining a strong mind in the field of courtship are uncertainty/your imagination, negative expectations, and just overall feelings. By uncertainty/imagination, I mean when you first start courting girls you don’t know what to expect and your imagination can get carried away and you can start feeling like you’re going to the electric chair or the gallows; it can feel like you are about to die. The fear is coming from not knowing what to expect. If you have dated girls and things have gone negatively you have negative expectations for courtship and that’s where your fear comes from. Fear is by far the greatest obstacle to learning anything new. Our first task to be good at courtship is to get over your fear.

To get over your fear you should do several things. 1.) Affirmations- you want affirmations, reasons to be confident and reasons to want to do it. You want these to be very compelling, so compelling that they suppress your fear. So you want to come up with affirmations and repeat those affirmations. It is my belief if you are patient and continue to repeat those affirmations your feelings will change. Your feelings will change enough to do what you want to do. Just don't quit. 2.) Plan- know what you are going to do. By knowing what you are going to do you remove an element of uncertainty and that makes things less intimidating. 3.) Style- know that the way you are going to court works, by observing that style has worked in others. Or build on the style of others and invent your own. 4.) positive experience- successfully courting girls will give you confidence because you will expect good things when you talk to women and that will make your confidence very secure.

Next, you practice and practice your style and courtship. After you have practiced enough your style of courtship becomes a habit. At this point you have discipline and can do what you want no matter how you feel because your habits will push you in the direction of doing them.

Lastly, no matter how good you are your approach may not go the way you want it to go. We don’t think about this going into an approach. We think we will do well. However, if it things do not go accordingly to plan there is a way to prepare for this: toughness affirmations. As I said toughness is when you think I will endure, I will preserve.. There are certain ways to feel this way. Thinking that you did the right thing or you will do better in the future will help you to not get down. You just want to be able to deal with the feelings of a set back well, You just want to be able to protect yourself emotionally because if you feel bad that can be very detrimental. Ironically, enough if you have a setback you will have the experience to know you can get through set backs.

Also you can always look to others that care to encourage you so that you become confident and so you become tougher. Others that will help you get to where you need to be mentally to do what you want to do.

Great post.