Arnold talks about the importance of using positiveness to get thru the pain and hard times

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9iy5gAKOP_U

The name is I want easy love, because "greatness is doing the hardest things in the world with the simplest of ease" and love is certainly one of the hardest.

As with any activity there is the SKILL and the WILL involved. The skill is the techniques. The will is withstanding pressures, overcoming fears, resisting destructive temptations...

Its all about discipline (developing an instinctive-habit of behaving a certian way, an instinctive habit of thinking a certain way, believing a certain way to direct your inner drives, using your feelings for the task, and even imagining things to get your mind to a certain place necessary for the job)

If a man works a job or plays a sport, he believes he can do it, he also expects to get money and women and power and respect from doing his job well. He puts al lthis energy into the job. And it becomes a habit. 8 hours, 10 hours, 12 hours...14 hours...16 hours.

The problem with pick up is that it is a hobby often. Its is not something messed into your life and your lifestyle. Its something you do on the side. However. if you could make it a part of your life then it would be easier. I don't think any celebrity spends much time thinking about women. They do their job well and they get women. James Bond, famous casanova...he never chases, and the women just come to him while he is on his mission. The women come to him while he is on his mission.

There are different places where you can approaches women...on the street, library, restaurant, plane, bus, train, job, airport, school, football game, club, bar, gym, coffee shop....

Now if you have never approached a woman in a specific place, you may not have confidence just because of the situation not because of the woman. So Its always nice to try approaches in different places to build your confidence for the situation. Affirm yourself then go right in.

Its also important to think about certain situational considerations when approaching a girl. If you frequent a Burger king and you approach a girl there maybe you don't want to take the risk of rejection just because it might hurt your reputation with people you see everyday...maybe you don't care.

Picking up at the bar is somewhat relying on crutches: 1.) the girl is looking for a guy. 2.) the girl might be drinking. 3.) In the this enviornment your are supposed to be hitting on women, like its sociably acceptable; you have the approval of others, it doesn't pose the challenge of the gym wear other guys not as confident are jealous or the library where people just want you to shut up and study. So I like to avoid the club because it does not allow much chances to practice your skills because it can be too easy to succeed. and it can be to easy on you mentally because there is not that much pressure as the environment approaves of your behavior.

Now, the thing about approaching in different settings is this. You don't want to spend your time thinking about every setting and coming up with a game plan for each one. It takes to much time. So its very efficient just to have one script/game plan you can use every where.

Pleasant Pain

Confidence and desire. When you're doing something hard you have to want the pain. And you do that by feeling so good about what you're doing that you can't help but do it (thinking about how great what your doing is, telling yourself you want the pain, thinking about the great things you will get from the pain, imagine that you will the things you want the most in life out of going thru this pain or that you will stop the things you don't want to happen the most from occuring by going through this pain). And you do it by feeling so confident that you can't help but expect success (tell yourself you will succeed, tell yourself you will do more thna you think you can, tell yourself you are powerful ~a lion, a warrior, an emperor, a machine~ something that will overcome the pain). ANd you do it by feelings so good about yourself that you can help but be secure/unaffected under pressure. And you do it by feel so proud/esteem that you are worthy of the world.

So next time you want to approach and it feels uncomfortable think "I want the pain, I want the pain"

This is a good one

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OAvmLDkAgAM

I read your feelings:

Goku Vs. Trunks (Goku reads trunks feelings @ 2:00 - 2:25) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6sYi7E1q ... re=related

You can tell a man that is insecure emotional. He can’t commit to anything to actions or words. Everything looks and sounds half hearted. A man's desire is contradicted by fear....

However, fear is not the only emotion evident in someones voice. You can hear pride and pleasure, you can hear hatred and anger, you can hear regret. Its importatn when talking to a girl to listen to what see is saying but also to listen to what she is not saying and what she is not saying will be obvious by the sound of her voice when she talks about certain things. (This way you can give her the things she wants, you can steer away from doing the things she hates, and more importantly you will know how to compliment).

A compliment works best when you have read a persons feelings, sensed insecurity and compliment them where they are inseucre. If she doubts her intelligence she needs to hear that she is a smart girl, if she doubts her cooking skills (you need to encourage her culminary talents), if she doubts her her hair do ( tell her her hair looks good)....caress her sore sports.

Fear and Anger as motivators requries that you are also scarred emotionally. Emotional scars work against confidence and self-esteem and happiness. Also, being overwhlemed leads to shame, a man is placed in an overwhelming situation and his confidence can be shattered....

A lot of times people can't do what they want to do because instincts. Discipline is hard to distract and hard to break. Thats really nice when you have instincts that you want to have. You see there is a difference between being yourself and doing what you want to do. Being yourself is following your instincts, doing what you want to do is following what you consciously want to do. There is discipline that is imposed on you and disciplie that you impose on yourself.
Alot of times I think most people don't care about other people because it seems they would rather just push their preferences on you and then you become a person that is too dominated by the will of others to do what you want to do.

You can actually overtly or secretly train another person. Overtly ala bossed someone around and making them do what you want them to do. Secretly ala consistenly doing certain things with them, I mean consistently and routinely until a habit forms. There are actualy relationship habits (behaving a certain way around certain people...its all instintual/habit). In fact this is a good way to get a girl to do something. Instead of pressuring her to do somethign she has never done before, you push her along slowly allowing for her feelings to change along the way. However ,you have to understand the value of patience. Most people dont have patience because they don't think something will work or they naively think it can work faster.

What strong feelings do is they break down discpline. This is how you break a man. You fill him with lust or you fill him with shame or with self-loathing and they abandon who they used to be. *i have always wondered could a broken man be rebuilt better....

Honor is all about your confidence and your value . Honor and respect reminds you of your value. When you treat people beneath their value, when you disresepect them and dishonor them you instill lies and self-defeating beliefs in them. You can become too intimidated to stand up for yourself and see where you can challenge or hurt others, you can be so impressed that you cant see that you can impress other people. YOu are so attracted to a girl... but do you see how you can attract her? This is why I hate when people put other people down, the shame makes them think they cant when they can.

Arrogance is better than insecurity because if you try and fail at least you tried, with insecurity you don't even try you psyche yourself out. It takes humility to recognize reality and confidence even arrogance to move past it and invent new realities.

Good stuff man it really helped me to start out my day

I think it is best to start off approaching girls using affirmations when you actually go out looking to talk to women. You know, when your purpose at that time is talking to women...

If you are out at work or are at school or just doing something else that is occupying your mind, its easier to not have as much resolve. And when you are first starting out resolve is very important. Its just that your mind may not be where it should be. Ofcourse you want to be at the point where you can just approach women anytime anywhere...maybe thats not something that is realistically attainable for everyone. Even more its not where everyone will start.

As always never get down on yourself, getting any job done starts with thinking you can.

"to accomplish anything great you have to take risks. Everybody knows that, but...the risk has to be of absolute, complete humiliation"

When you approach women, from your preparation and practice and experience you want to expect to win. However, there will be times win you won't be prepared or you just won't know what to do or to say. Ideally, you would not want to get embarrassed...however that may be the price you have to pay for a shot at your goal sometimes. Can you embrace the pain? Misery is ecstacy, because misery (sometimes) is the price that you have to pay for ecstacy. So you need to look at that misery as pleasant, you need to think of that sacrifice as joyful....

However, shame is not an emotion you want to commune with on a regular basis. I mentioned the importance honor. When you get embarassed/dishonored/disrespected you can become soundly convinced that you can't do something or that you are not good enough. I mean soundly convinced. In fact, you may not even want to think about it because it is so painful. Misery is Esctacy... It is really hard to rebuild yourself if you get broken down like that. So unless necessary I would avoid getting your feelings all hurt. If you do you have to push yourself back into those dark places and prove your critics wrong. To prove it in your mind again that you are worthy and strong enough. That is what vindication is all about , restoring honor and the esteem and confidence that comes with it.

I really don't encourage guys to approach girls naturally unless they are good at it and can control yourself. If you are a nervous guy and you approach girls and just be "natural" you may be creating bad habits. Remember the game is part will and part skill. Confidence alone rarely gets you girls, just like courage alone rarely wins a fight. You have to be skilled. And just doing any old thing, saying any old thing is not going to get you what you want. In fact, its going to get you in the habit of doing the wrong thing. Along with expecting bad results (if you succeed a lot from experience you expect success, if you fail alot then you expect failure, if your results are inconsistent that leads to anxiety as you don't know what to expect). Remember, "being yourself" and "doing what you want to do," and "being yourself" and "doing what needs to be done" are not always the same thing.

How does Misery become ecstacy? you want to imagine all your emotional needs being fulfilled by the action you are about to take, all your drives, every thing. That teacher you are mad at, you are getting back at them by doing this. That new car you want, this is going to get it for you. That thing you are afraid, taking this action will save you from ever having to deal with that consequence again.


A word about Amoging....

whenever I confront someone I like to catch them off guard. So they are not prepared. I want to be very prepared with what I have to say and say it quick and fast. I want to overwhelm them....

Are you kidding me? Affirmations? Really?

You can think of affirmations as taking yourself to a certain place mentally. You say it once its like pushing yourself in a certain direction, then you say it again its like pushing yourself in a certain direction and then you say it again you finally get their.THe place you're going to in your mind is confidence, so think of it as a bright room, a really bright room that smells really pleasant. So you're in this mental place and by going to this place again and again you develop an instinct to think that way and feel that way, a habit of being in that room. ANd the more you think that way the more secure you get and its like closing the door behind you...eventually even looking the door. Thats done with the repition of affirmations.

Now, it is possible for a word to be so impactful that you are taken to that place instantly and have a strong instinct to go to that place again. (think of uncle phil throwing jazz out of the house http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N9vUNDY45Jc)

This is called mental discipline.

what feeligns do is they drive you to a place mentally. If its doubt or shame or fear they drive you to that place, and if you are scarred they continue to push you to that place. Its really like fighting yourself. You can always relapse if you start thinking about those memories.

I can speak with authority that I have seen this work with my own eyes.This is as true as hammers drive nails.

"I said I was the greatest before I Knew I was" (ALI)


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_KhCvL6gxGI

Angelo Dundee (Ali's trainer) http://www.nytimes.com/2012/02/03/sport ... e-man.html