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If you're this self-concious, don't go swimming. Also, unless you're a real fat fuck (having a little gut is not an issue) then it's not a big deal. I know a lot of fat guys that lay hot girls (I used to be big myself) and now I'm at 160 and fit.
Naturally, if you're this concerned and insecure with your body ....I don't even get how you get laid. The fat guy or the douchebag usually give less of a fuck. For women good looks help, but no girl will fuck you because you have abs - maybe a shallow one.
In any case, is that the type of girl you want? If you can't take your shirt off when you're with a girl that you're hitting on, can you ACTUALLY have sex with her? Think about it. put the two and two fucking together.
Thank you.