Ive decided to make myself a journal to keep myself better motivated and to become better focused on certain aspects of my game...

Basically i have had decent success in the past, with every year improving
Most of i would say came down to luck or just being at the right party at the right time and so on. I would really like to reach a point where i can have complete control over gaming situations i find myself in...

Im currently at College and go to the clubs about 3 times a week. I would like to find other alternatives on off days too and during the day to further stretch my game to a new level.

Basically im going to jump straight into it

Areas to work on:

- Be able to open when not drunk

- Talking to fast and unclearly creating communication problems

- Failure to aim for any connection or interest in her...

being way to cocky,,,
and linking to trying to be funny and entertaining with stupid comments...
(Really going for laughs to much and dying out soon)

- Lack of moving things forward and physical contact (looking for 100% signals first)


So this week im going to focus on 2 things in particular

1. Aim to be friendly and social. Smile more, turn the insults into flirting. Calm down on the entertainment and stupid comments basically be more solid and mature. CONNECTION AND FRIENDLINESS

2. Strong and slower vocal tonality with expression that highlights assertiveness and also a postive vibe. Slowing down my voice and making it more mature and postitive can hopefully also have an effect on changing my whole vibe to a more solid and higher value (less entertaining / commenting) vibe.

Last night got way to drunk. Realized there is no way of trying to game when drunk and a more sober state is required. Must be more aware of drunk levels and if i do get to drunk must aim to rather have fun instead of trying to game girls.

Voice tonality must still improve. More enthusiasm

Also realized if you send across the vibe that you dont feel you are hooking their attention then they will pick up on it. got to get the mindset that they are interested in you.

Managed to hookup when i sobered up but took way to long to close. I sort of had the feeling she wanted to but i kept having doubts. In these situations i must just gun it and close and the close will happen. Dont have doubts, just close when you have even a slight feeling. Worst that can happen is she knows what you wants which could probably help you too.

Last night taught me a valuable lesson, mainly: Pursue and Persist the close and you will get it.

In the past i have backed down a lot in those end game situations, came up with excuses on why i couldnt pull because i was out of my comfort zone.

Usually i bounce around way to much in the club, not really getting any depth interactions but lately i have been investing more effort into less people and it seems to be working, helping both my closing and also expanding my social circle. I seem to be able to do more for less.

This time i found a group of girls my mate was chilling with and i got the feeling one of them was interested and she was by far one of the much better looking ones. Instead of having a shallow conversation and flirt with her this time i didnt back down on a safe level. I invested effort, got to know her more all the time kept up the flirting and tried to escalate at a solid pace. I managed to isolate her and just went straight for the pull (this time rejection didnt cross my mind).

I went back to her flat where she was staying with some friends but they were all still out. I managed to F close her and that was only my third one ever. I also am noticing that i am getting much more comfortable and leading in these end game situations due to doing it more often.

Things to take out of this night:

- Invest more instead of bounce around having shallow and short encouters. Try have 15 min interactions with as many girls per night you can. At the moment it averages brief 2 minute ones and then i eject.


- If you even slightly think there is a possibility of a close or want it, then pursue and persist to that close. Do not make excuses or back down just go for it and learn from it. And if you get denied then actually laugh with your mates about it and be happy you actually tried!


- The more end game pulling from the club situations i get myself into the better i will get at them. I can already feel myself getting more sharp in these situations.



Goal for next month: Really work on investing longer interactions with people and stop bouncing around as much. Also realize when you need to stop being cocky in these interactions and slow it down and connect more. Basically balance it out more, show them some smiling and interest and have a longer interaction.

Lessons learned:

1. Talking slow and smoothe with a smile and eyecontact is killer . Seems to build alot more attraction and interaction progresses a lot easier.

2. Energy levels and a positive good mood are key. Confidence increases, good vibes are let off, and it really attracts the girls. Need to mentally be able to get into this happy positive and fun state as much as possible and have control to get into it without alcohol.

3. Walking up to a girl and talking to her. Putting effort into trying to close her. Very confident when introduced yet way to expectant on them to come up to me. Got to learn to have outrageous confidence and just gun it in every aspect. Even if they like you, most of the time its up to you to initiate that hook. Tap tap.

-------
So hooked up with a girl but failed to escalate last night. We were both sober and i had trouble getting the pants off. So i guess the issue here was some LMR. As most of my other lays took place when i was slightly drunk, i think being sober made me lack some sexual confidence and sober as i was a bit hesitant.

------------- Solutions: IMPROVE END GAME ESCALATION, and LMR

Obviously practice makes perfect. But there are several things i could of done a lot better.

First of all the location was not ideal, cold and uncomfortable. I should have put more effort into finding a comfortable place.


I tried to pull of her pants a bit to early. Should have turned her more on first and increased her state. I also looked nervous when doing so and almost looked for her approval which i think she picked up on.

After she denied me i gave up!!!! I didnt even try deal with resistance which was really stupid of me!!! I should have agreed with her and then just gone back a step or two and tried later. Persistence through the resistance.


Future: I think i am going to spend some time reading some escalation tactics and stories of other people who have had trouble with LMR and then put it into action when im next in this situation.

(By the way ive stopped reading countless theory and only read when i encounter problems or areas i could improve or master on).


Side note: Took way to long to pull in to the girl or initate physical contact. Need to get close proximity with her sooner and just close !! (especially when you know she wants you, because it doesnt matter how you do it!!!)

Basically just a quick summary of all my current trouble points. Journaling them in the last two weeks has really helped me focus on these issues and at times they really go away, but i should aim to break it down to one problem at a time even more. However, here they are.



1. Approach Anxiety

Lack of confidence to go up to someone and open them without fear. This comes down all the way back to step 1 approach anxiety. It is really time i tackle this problem for good. Got to get a hook and let them know that im there and possibly interested.






2. Talk slower and smoother. (which also = No entertainer!!!!)

This makes me look more confident, say less stupid things, makes me feel more high value and mature instead of acting / trying to be funny all the time. Slow smoothe talking automatically makes the "entertainer" problem go away at the same time! perfect. (Just make sure there is assertion and some enthusiasm in the voice.) Also projected and clear so she can hear properly.

+

Also: More eyecontact as this helps with the below aspect of showing more interest and connecting. When you focus on eyecontact it tends to slow things down in itself and allow for all these things to happen without thinking. Genuinely be interested in what shes saying and give solid eyecontact.




3. Lack of interest and connection!!!!


Simply being friendly, not insulting her as much etc. Because after while if all you do is act like an asshole to her shes gonna say fuck off! Especially from the hook, show interest and be nice which makes it smoother. Talk to her longer, show her you are sexually interested and then she will respond by being interested in you. Then later on you can push her away a little and play a little hard to get, but my interactions need less comments and more substance.

So basically
- Show her interest, let her know you want her (SO VITAL!!!!!)
- Invest in more substance conversation, appreciate her and connect
- Makes interactions longer, leaves proper attraction and easier to isolate.




4. Have longer interactions, stop bouncing around so much. (Like greet and talk!)

Like when you see a friend, dont always just say whats up and then leave. Stop and have a chat with them!!! Or when you meet a girl through a friend dont just say hi then leave!!! Stop fucking ejecting and having thousands of 10 second interactions. Make some effort to stay put for a while and have longer interactions where you can actually get some interaction!!!




5. Just always be happy, having fun and energetic. (self ammuse)


Get yourself into a state. This means your more postive, smile more, do more etc. Its as simple as making it your goal to have some pumped up fun. If you catch yourself tired, unhappy or low energy: "Think how can i have fun!!"




6. Get more proximity and physical contact.


This creates so much attraction, get over the fear. Just do it with dominance and playfulness. Stop looking for signs to do this, just do this. The same with going for a kiss close, just do it. If you get denied laugh and try again later. This will definitely be discussed in more depth later. Note also try get closer to her as it makes touch much easier.



7. End game and LMR.


Work on being smoother in the bedroom and dealing with resistance.





So heres the deal, spend time every day visualizing these situations and get more focused on them. Do the reading for the ones that need be it, and focus on only one or two primarily when going out.

- Approaching means more practice. And longer interactions mean more interaction time. So get these down first.


- LMR etc cant just be focused on and practiced, so should not be a worry until in those situations.


- That leaves me with 4 others: Voice, interest / connection, positive state, and touch.

Point 1


Tried to extend interactions tonight. Greeted and them actually had lengthy conversations instead of just saying whatsup and bouncing around.

These longer interactions:
- meant more time to build connections, make friends
- actually met more people through introductions
- there was actually opportunity for something to happen

but, can still extend these interactions even longer as i still sometimes eject immediatley after meeting or greeting.




Point 2

When being introduced to hot friends, dont be so hesitant. instead of making a shaky greeting and then just ejecting, realize.... It doesnt HAVE TO be awkward

Just go up introduce yourself assertively, with eye contact and a solid hand shake, or a DOUBLE ARMED hug with a kiss on the cheek. Then interact and not eject!!!




Point 3


Aiming to connect and be more interested etc came along almost naturally with the longer interactions. This smooth, more simple, and more mature approach seems to just ring of higher value and builds attraction quicker while at the same time eliminating potential fuckups. SLOWER VOICE seems to bring on this more mature and solid vibe naturally too, as well as connective eyecontact.

Make sure you keep up with aiming to get rid of the ENTERTAINING, stupid comments and insults vibe as it is consitantly appearing less and less. Also go sexxual, but not so stupid sexual like i have been doing, and definitely at 3 comments max not an entire interaction!!! Create a solid base , then spice it up with a sexual comment or a tease, like 3 times every 15 minutes. Think about it, once every 5 minutes not alot at all!! keep it smooth and friendly for the other time, not a stupid comment every 20 seconds!!! control yourself with these



Point 4

Fear of approaching. Man up and meet new people, introduce and work on smooth landings. This element is vital and is now PRIORITY 1. Stop relying on people you know, go out there and be able to introduce yourself.


THIS IS THE ULTIMATE PRIORITY. SET GOALS. NEXT TIME OUT THIS HAS TO HAPPEN. LET THIS BE A REMINDER!!!!!!!!

was in low energy levels at beginning of night, feeling sort of negative and so on. this led to me not having as much vibe, not talking as free flowing, and not being a happy fun person.



step 1 = SNAP: made the decision to do something about that state.


step 2 = pump self up: go crazy and make positive mental affinrmations and get as much physical movement as possible. Think your the best and be happy and very energetic.


step 3 = Overcome butterfly effect: its all very well having a quick spontaneous outburst of energy and good vibes but you must persist to mantain this state for at least 20 minutes so that it becomes natural and you just are in that state. So keep pumping yourself up for a while after.



These are my steps to pumping up state and making my game soar.

I did tend to get closer proximity wise to girls tonight.

----- One thing that worked very well was getting very close and almost whispering. this made my voice clearer and was also pretty attractive.

because i got my proximity closer and almost invaded personal space it was much easier to launch touch. so let it be known that proximity is KEY.

get close and touch will be that much easier!!!





LACK OF TOUCH: despite good promixity, there is still such a lack of confidence when it comes to physical contact and therefore creates a lack there of. This issue needs to be addressed and it basically all comes down to confidence.






NOT PULLING IN: again even when i knew they wanted to or maybe there was a slight chance of me being blocked but it was highly likely i would succeed; i failed to pull in!!! all i have to do is just do it! like just pullin!!!

MANUP AND JUST PULL IN

once again coming down to confidence... like really just do it, believe it, and dont give a fuck about the weak rejection. if touch had been better to it also would have made it a whole lot easier than out of nowhere.

touch, closeness, eyecontact, attractive voice tone, a smile, being connective and flirting a tiny bit = you easily have the girl.

again had the problem of people not hearing me in the club. what i realized is that this could actually be my fundamental flaw, as in quiet areas of the club i can hold attention for loooong periods of time and its all smoothe, where as in noisy areas its very "what" "cant hear you" etc and unattractive.


they key thing to do here which actually worked for me:

- Speak so much slower, like three times slower.

- Project your words as much as possible.

- most importantly overly pronounce your words.... and make use of emphasis and pauses (this seemed to work perfectly)






CONNECTION:
- simply that when i started acting friendly, interested and aimed for a connection as a base with flirting etc as a spice, i ended up having lengthy conversations and made some proper attraction, like girls digged me SO MUCH MORE!! so really just be simple, and be connective and act interested.

Realized tonight it really does all come down to confidence, experience and comfort zones. If in your mind you have it, you really do have it.


So keeping that short, simple and brief: the real issue here is once again simply; i need more confidence and i need to get more comfortable and adept in different and particular situations. Instead of trying to mold my game, why not try GROW my game instead. Instead of refining and improving; why not take my game to a whole new level in itself, and watch all the other social skills in life follow after with ease. So the issue here is CONFIDENCE (ie familiar comfort zones and experience in situations which provides command and skill over these situations).


A more practical question is HOW do I achieve this fabled confidence.


Through practice, and putting myself in unfamiliar and unskilled situations.



Lets start all the way at block one, because everyone has to start somewhere.


The approach: the ability to walk up to anyone without fear and start a conversation. Without the confidence to do this, everything you ever do will come down to luck and perhaps a snail slow learning curve. APPROACH and meet new people and you have earned yourself game point 1.


If you can do this without fear , then you are already exposing yourself to more practice and interaction and you are on your way.


So for now the goal is simply: Be able to approach without FEAR.


THIS IS ALL THAT MATTERS FROM NOW ON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



In reality; it all comes down to a process. A very simple one. How to get from A to B ie sex in the most efficient and effortless way possible. All the games and tricks in the world dont matter because in the end it all comes down to being comfortable and confident in the simple step situations of the pickup and thus moving towards the close with ease without overcomplication.

For example: You know a girl wants you; tell her to come chill with you outside and chat and then close, instead of trying to play games to much with her.

Qualifying as a tool to connect
- finding proper interest in her, genuine... compliment her to reward her for good actions or investments.

connection as just having fun together and jolling... you really are working as a team, both are friendly to eachother, positive vibes, interest and tension in the air
A SIMPLE DIRECT POSITIVE INTEREST ON INTEREST THEME
(where qualifying is the tool to actually connect...) and connection is the overall frame that your relationship should be, positive on positive.


introduce conspiracies again, chilled fun and playful ones


hand hold test



open
- reframe as exciting almost
- strong approach...

= slow and powerful voice with pauses... hey, im james
= eyecontact and good smile

not directly facing, talking slow, and leaning back

deliver in a way where she just cant refuse!!

practice on people you wouldnt want to hook, maybe even friend zone the shit out of them, because it gets you comfortable in those exciting new situations. the goal here is having loving the approach and not caring

Going out tonight with a focus.

Build connection with girls. Create a vibe where you feel you are both getting along very well and you both know it. Almost smiling with a sly confidence that you know that you will hookup. Good vibes create good vibes. Send these vibes upon them and create a bubble. Laugh alot. Be more friendly. Tease in a way she cant stop laughing. (CREATE A BUBBLE!!)

Throw in some qualifying in this vibe, slow things down. Show real interest in her and give her some genuine compliments as a reward. Also make sure you project a confidence that you deserve to be there. Any weak thoughts and she will sense you are unworthy.

So create a connection filled positive positive vibe. (focus on smiles, laughs and good vibes.)

Try some qualifying and genuine interest with rewarding compliments. (eyecontact)

Use your voice and send off vibes of confidence and a real self assurance that you have her and deserve to be there.

KEEP IT CONNECTIVE, SIMPLE, and MORE DIRECT tonight.

Out.

Tonight was a very good one in terms of learning experience.



Firstly i was very confident and seemed to have little fear in walking up and talking to new girls. it was almost fun, and created a lot more fun and interesting events into the night.

So: HIGH REWARD
and: NOT SCARY AT ALL ACTUALLY JUST FUN
(at one stage this girl i opened had her boyfriend right behind her and it wasnt bad at all! )


Another thing i noticed is that if i can get my opening delviery down smoothely and clearly it seems most girls open up positively.

note: If there is resistance this is just a test and you should plough through to achieve a smoothe landing.

Confidence is key: and practicing opening delivery and getting it wrong or right is FUN AND EXCITING.





Being a fun charismatic guy with positive energy and a aura of having fun is really the attractive person you want to be. Be good to people, compliment them, always be happy and smile, let people feel your positive energy. If you act with charm and charisma people will really find you attractive and high value.

Project a CHARISMATIC FUN character.... instead of negative too cool one.

being fun vs being bored or complaining its not fun
smiling and being friendly vs being rude and unopen
genuinely being interested in them, complimenting vs talking about self
being supportive of friends vs being jealous
projecting high value vs trying to entertain







With the opens last night, a big thing i really need to work on is delivery. it is definitely at an adequete level but i feel i do unattrative things without realizing for example:

eye contact is submissive
lean in to much
being unclear in voice tone / talking to fast!!!!!! really speak slower...

so have fun on practicing your approach as you build your confidence!!





Had a really good looking girl isolated and was chatting to her. its been a few times where ive not succeeded in a situation like this.

what happens is it always looks semi on, but as the conversation carries on it seems to dwindle and ends up with me ejecting or her leaving.

It comes down to these reasons.

1. there is a lack of physical contact and sexual escalation. got to be at least holding hands, very close etc and have to get more intimate eyecontact with a slower voice etc. the vibe im giving off is way to boring and unsexual.


2. i talk about random stuff, and about myself perhaps which maybe has her attracted to me already but isnt going to move things forward. I almost seem to procrastinate and talk about boring stuff.

So instead of this MAKE THE CONVO MORE ABOUT THE GIRL... give her some coldreads, and tie it up with qualifying. act interested, make it really high value
(COLDREADS AND QUALIFYING, or even SEXUAL INTENT, or about SEX)


3. As you do not escalate, you start to feel doubt if she wants you and project a vibe of unworthiness. GOT TO PROJECT A VIBE and deliver it in a way that states:

I deserve to be here, i will hook you, im interested in you and i know your loving me even more.











all in all really starting to have a lot of fun gaming girls, even getting rejected. Working on certain aspects, playing them through qualifying, pulling off smoothe interactions where your delivery feels so good you feel like you almost own them because you have it so down, working on end game sex skills, getting better at dancing, being comfortable in so many social situations... just seems to get better and better and more fun as time goes on. Its a process and i really am enjoying the process. finding problems in my game is great because then i can watch and enjoy it as i find a solution and tighten up my game. its great to see opening is not a problem any more and perhaps i can start getting hooks from other than introductions. still really need to work on physical contact at beginning, still lacks confidence and has unceratinty to it... i like how im creating more connective vibes with girls though in general, tends to be easier and smoother, but could still execute some solid qualifying into the mix more often.

Just read the last report and I think I am in a similar situation. Last night I made a few bullet points like not leaning in, talking slower,etc. While I did fulfill it on some levels, I kept forgetting these things in some situations, hence I am still a very young learner.
One really annoying thing is that bars are so freaking loud and I get the urge to lean in so they can hear me.
As for escalation, I've chatted up girls and gotten tons of physical contact. I like to tap a girls shoulder and lightly and smoothly move my hand down her arm and make our hands touch and let go. Anyway, since I am still learning I don't know how to proceed after escalation. As am writing this, I am realizing that I am doing nothing to isolate! I need to work on some techniques to isolate because a lot of times that I open a two set, the obstacle has to be dealt with.