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Hey there I would like your opinion on flaky girls when your trying to get them on a first date. It seems like I can approach fine, have fun, get the #, text for a bit then try to set up the first date and I'm just getting a lot of flaky girls. Have you had a lot of this? Seems like for every 6#'s I get maybe 2 actually go on a date. Any advice is very helpful. Even sometimes the girl will be down for it the day before then back out on the actual day. Trying to get a better success rate here. Thanks
What I have learned throughout the years is that women have a natural flake mentality. They over think everything, especially when it comes to dating and men. If they have an opportunity to talk themselves out of things(men) they will.
As we all know women are emotional creatures, they act mostly on emotion and tend to not be very logical in their thinking process. This is what makes them such amazing creatures but at the same time, extremely difficult to understand.
In my experience, to get the girls to commit to another encounter, you must get into their heads, It is very important to create some sort of a connection, preferably an emotional one. The deeper a connection, the less chance of a flake.
There is different ways to create a connection with a woman. Ideally you want to trigger as many emotions as possible ( good emotions).
Steps:
1) Create comfort
2) Show interest
3) Create an emotional connection ( and a feeling of being safe with you)
4) Create sexual tension ( Go at her pace, but escalate as much as she lets you)
5) Paint an intriguing picture of your next encounter( hang out NOT date)
The philosophy behind " hanging out" vs "date" is this:
A
date is full of expectations, its a word that triggers so many thoughts and emotions from a woman. Every girl has their idea of a perfect date, they watch movies with the perfect men, the prince charming"s etc. etc. It's a lot for any man to live up to, they will talk to there friends about it, they will expect specific things and you to act according to their image of what a date should be. They will not be themselves at all and it has a great chance of turning into an interview rather then two people hanging out and getting to know each other better.
Hang out is very chill, relaxed, two people getting to know each other, no expectations, no pressure.
Such a simple word "date" yet so powerful. I suggest never using this word, even if you are really into the girl. Save that for down the road if you want her to be your girl. If your just looking to get laid, NEVER use it.
If you do not have enough time to create any type of connection during your initial pick up. You can still get them to see you again, but you must intrigue them enough, and still get into their heads. (If they gave you the right digits, there is generally some type of attraction)
Note: Sometimes woman are too nice and will still give their number even if not interested. But! It is up to you to identify these women through observing their body language and general demeanor. ( in that case, drop them your digits) If you were wrong, and they get in touch with you. All the better.
Ok back to getting the day two without creating a good connection. When working on a girl that you first approached, you must sell the next encounter to her. For example. As you are chatting her up, talk about wanting to take her somewhere that is special to you, or somewhere that you both have heard about and wanted to check out, or something super fun. Sell it good, make her excited about it, keep it somewhat casual. ( if you have already shown your attraction to her, you don't need to press it, make the encounter easy for her to agree to)
Do this before asking for her digits. Even if you just want to invite her over to your place, make it something intriguing, offer to make her dinner. SELL SELL SELL the next encounter, if she shows interest in it, that is when you secure the digits.
By making your intentions to hang out with her clear before you ask for her number, she will associate giving her number to you with hanging out with you.
You should also never ask for the digits unless you are already feeling a comfortable vibe with the girl, if she is not showing signs of being comfortable, keep working. Try to make her laugh and smile. Build comfort and attraction, flirt with her, but at the same time give her the impression that you are a great guy and she will feel very safe with you.
As far as texting, there is very different views about how to do it. I personally will build sexual tension and see how far I can open up a woman sexually.( that way if she comes to hang out with me, she will have associated me with sex and it will most likely be implied when we hang out) But this is me. I have been playing this game for 20 yrs and I usually always have built a connections with a woman prior.
If you are not so experienced, keep the texting short and sweet, and setting up the next encounter. Keep it light and fun, be persistent in getting her out, but not needy.
Because of a woman's high flake potential, its important to strike while the fire is hot. If she has shown good signs of interest in you, and your text banter is fun. Get her to meet you as soon as possible. It's also good to challenge them, women are surprisingly competitive. If you can make your next encounter something that challenges her it will keep her intrigued.
CHAT
