I believe "ahh your place?" was the turning point.

She was suspicious of you trying to get her into bed, and your answer did not satisfy that concern.

I liked the link to Adams pua bootcamp comments. Since that tread is locked, I wont comment further but it was refreshing to see both the strengths and weaknesses of these events.

If your boring through text than what does that say about you in person? You have 10-15 minutes to come up with something clever so use it to your advantage. You don't have to be some super witty dude but holy hell atleast try to be a bit charming. If your texts are that simple than I can only imagine what your real life game is like when you have to respond within seconds.

And to be honest I'm not exactly sure how you would work on being funny/witty/clever/articulate so I have no material to suggest to you.

Poodogr, I find it Ironic that you come here asking for help and then you rationalize and pretty much dispute any help giving to you as "not being good enough". I don't know what it is you want but what I tell can you is a few of the guys here are a lot more experienced than you are and they're help should be considered more than your own rationalizations.

The whole "don't text me again" was just a test that you didn't pass. Honestly, if she felt that way, would she text you that or would she just completely stop talking to you all together.? Thats just pure logic, she was baiting you to see if you saw her as a slut or not. She would of came right over hadn't you responded the way you did. Just give it another day or two, she'll contact you.

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from your post and what I see,

she probably wanted to use you, you seemed like a pushover, sort of proved to be one, soon as the frame turned somewhat romantic, she expressed dis-interest and backed out

there could be a million other things, but what stood out was, blah blah blah, my car, she liked that shit, gave her a ride, hellz ya, she hits me up

her:blah blah blah, come drive me in your car
you:kk babe anyting you want babez

her:blah blah blah, you gonna get a better job for more monies?
you:you know it babez, anyting you want for you babez!!

you:hey babez, if it's not too much trouble or anything, and you don't have anything better going on, could you pretty please with a cherry on top bless the lowly me with your presense one time?, I have a nice car

her:you mean like, beyond me and your car and you?
you:yeah pretty much, but I also do other stuff for you

her:FUCK NO, HELLS TO THE NO, GTFO NO!!


that is the way that conversation seemed to translate, this is pretty standard shit imo, you played pretty easy to get, not like I am advocating playing hard to get or anything, but it was sort of like, she says jump, you say how high?, not an ounce of screening went on with this girl, first meetup she runs away?, why even waste time on this girl, you could have found this out way sooner and not invested any of yourself into her

also the problem was not plausible deniability, in no way did he even suggest having sex, and the frame sure did not seem to imply it, possibly she had sexual intentions but this guy was 100% a-sexual to the max

her: like your place?
him:nah, not like my place, I mean ya we can go there, but you know... bars and stuff and restaurants girl...

I don't want to quibble over a minute detail or two. I definitely do appreciate the feedback, and I can assure you; I'm not boring.

Any guy who drops a girl off at her car on a first date to "Thanks so much! We're definitely gonna do this again." followed by several texts over the next few days, I'd say has passed the "boring/ not interesting enough" test.

I could be wrong. Call me crazy, but that's just how it seems to me.

"Don't ever text me again." would be quite a test; I've seen tests and called girls out on them; but none have been anything like that. I thought we all acknowledged that that was a fucked up response no matter what the motivation.

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I have no idea if your boring or not, I've never met you, and I don't judge people, especially from having read so little about them - however, I wouldn't go crowning yourself with the 'I'm not boring' achievement because you dropped her off and by your own admission, intermittently exchanged texts.

With that said, you might wanna think about not using the my place technique so early next time. I think it's high risk, high reward, but I think you have to have way more rapport with the girl then what you did.

That caricature is completely unfair and inaccurate. It's insulting and veering in the dir of personal attacks. I wasn't a pushover and didn't talk in any way like that.

I'll clarify the substantive points though about the facts:

The car only came up because we were sitting outside and talking about how nice of a day it is; I mentioned I rode with my top down to the place. She didn't pry ("ooooh, what do you have?" it jus came out.

The thing about her idea about a road trip so early in the process, now that I've had a little more time to think about it, really sounds more bipolar than anything. A 180 "don't ever text me again" only supports that.

I never told her "anything you want" or even implied that.

In fact, about the job thing, the funny thing is i made it clear if she started w my org., it *wouldn't* be a lot of money at first, (very specific knowledge/skills needed for this line of work) she could be promoted to a decent level in a few years, but that I could look into it and see if we had anything coming up. When we were in touch and she had asked me if I had checked on it.

I replied, "Not yet, I need to think about how I'm going to approach this."

I'm not a pushover on a date, but I've definitely tried being Clint Eastwood too and the girls don't wanna have anything to do w that either bc it's not pleasant enough.

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Dude, you have GOT to stop fixating on that. I was a little surprised that someone made that rude comment to you, but you've just made it ten times worse by trying to defend yourself against it so vigorously.

I agree, I mainly meant by "My place", "The patio restaurant a block away/out in front of my building and I'll come down and we can walk over.", stuff like that.

Of course I know this, and you guys all know this, but I could see how she could take that a different way, although her initial response wasn't one of revulsion. That apparently came later.

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Your right, I didn't consider that this short post w the drove-by was coming from someone who joined less than 3 months ago w 40 posts to his name.

I'll be better about this next time.

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The trouble is that you're quite happily attacking anyone who tells you anything you don't want to hear. That guy shouldn't have called you boring, but attacking his credentials doesn't achieve anything and is irrelevant to what he may have been saying.

I sympathised with your initial post as much as anyone, but your defensive attitude is VERY alienating, and is not going to make you any friends. You need to either listen and learn or just quit this damn thing while you're behind...

if you feel insulted by my post, fair enough, don't ask for critism if you are not ready to hear it

the car and any sort of financial situation or frame that presents ''look at what I have'' should not be presented at all, you should avoid at all costs qualifying yourself to a girl, not even heh yeah it's just a ferrari it's nothing really

doesn't matter, avoid your job, your finances, your religious and political views, how old you are, how many girls you have been with.. etc. etc. do not be qualifying yourself for her on her own shallow terms, you were a pushover in the sense that she was leading and you were following, she invites you out, you say yes, she shows interest you comply, you request compliance, she will not comply

further explaining yourself on the internet does not somehow change what situation you are in, and from the limited write up in your OP, it still seems loud and clear,

she wanted to use you for reasons that were not romantic, as soon as that fell through for her, she ran off, simple as day,

you can and will do as you want, so why not just text her or call her some more, but pretty much if some girl tells me ''im not interested, never call me again'', i'm probably not going to call her again

also being more dominant and leading has little to do with being clint eastwood, and more to do with being proactive while remaining unreactive to those around you

did you even screen her for her interest in you, rather then pitching what you could offer her? your write up is fairly cut and dry and heavily influences the frame around both her actions and your actions in your post

Shotgun: I agree; I could work on listening more and better. When I get feedback though that just doesn't jive with how the situation is at all, my knee-jerk reaction, like I'm sure it is with a lot of people, is to defend and call-out inaccuracies,

- when, what I should really be doing is just acknowledging that with an Internet writeup of a week-long exchange with a girl, that's just the nature of the beast.

Pumpington: I've been accused of over-analyzing stuff, too much. That's why I rolled up to this date with the mindset, "I'm just gonna go with the flow and meet up with a girl I don't know."

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that's fine, in simple terms, did you even hit on her a bit?, was she even aware you liked her ''romantically'' before she wanted to ''ride in your car''?

hit on girls so they know what you are about, if they don't know and it is not at least suggested by the frame, then they have express permission to lead you on endlessly to use you for some other means beyond a sexual relationship of some kind (not saying you have to fuck every girl you talk to)

and that is just screening, if she is not showing interest in you showing interest, then there is a good chance she is not interested

if you want her to touch your dick, try to sell it to her and how amazing it is and comes with an awesome person behind it,

if you want her to want to ride in your car and try to get you to pay for shopping trips, advertise your job and the car you drive,

the frame behind the interaction is important, and once you have a good understanding of frame control you can easily define a frame without putting much thought into it at all, it is simply being proactive and speaking your mind, not folding for some girl who has not earned it, let her invest some before you invest in her, that is the only point

I'm just a bit confused as to what you were hoping to achieve posting this thread. All you're focusing on is the ways in which people are disagreeing with you. If you have your understanding of the situation and you're happy with it, why ask people for their input?