I would like to hijack this thread a bit to help yansaccnt in his quest for becoming a genuine alpha male. J stugots here is a prime example of the genuine alpha male. Sure, he feels down for the moment due to his recent divorce but he has been managing this down cycle in his life through alpha male techniques.

First, stugots know how to leverage the knowledge, expertise and experience of other guys to come up with the best decision. Unlike alpha male gorillas, human alpha males are extremely social creatures. The anti-social alpha male human is a fake one for the simple reason that he doesn't stand a chance when the genuine alpha male leverages his social power.

Second, stugots has skills that place him at the top of the food chain and is still open minded in learning new skills and polishing them. The beta male does not want to learn new skills and has fewer skills than the alpha male. Hence, in a very competitive environment, the beta male always loses while the alpha male wins due to the skills that he has learned and polished with great effort, time and lots of smarts.

These are lessons in life that you can see from a genuine alpha male like stugots. Discern well.

I think I kind of know what to do here, but I will admit, I'm a little frustrated and would like to get some feedback. First, a little background.

I'm 37, she's 38. We are both very busy, white collar professionals (actually, I hate to admit it, she seems to be busier than I am lately).

Anyway, first date, hit it off great F closed. We go out again for my birthday, she's really into it, then another time, etc. Then radio silence. I stay in contact with her, mostly one-sided, then out of the blue she asks if I can meet her for an impromptu drink. I'd like to say a month has gone by since we've been out last. I decline, because, quite frankly, I had a date that night. The next day, I ask her the same, "meet for spontaneous drink" she tells me where she is, she just got out of work, didn't order yet, I meet her.

We meet, things are going great, and then it does come up, in a normal way, why the radio silence for a while? She told me that she got very embarassed because I f closed the first date. She claims she doesn't do that, but that it was actually, in a way, a compliment to me, because she felt very comfortable with me, obviously, but still couldn't believe she slept with me so quickly, and that anything for the future would be doomed because of it, most likely (woman logic, I know).

I told her ridiculous that was, and why she just didn't call me or tell me this sooner, we obviously hit it off? Again, she said or claimed she was really embarassed..she even said something to the effect of, "We're not like 25, we shouldn't be moving so fast." She went on further to say she's used to being courted more, etc. I said, "fine, I understand, we can take a step back if you want. I obviously like you, we obviously like hanging out with each other, we'll just take a step back." She liked that idea. I paid for dinner (which means it was a date) and she wanted to get another glass of wine somewhere else, so we did. I told her, no matter how much she'd beg, I wouldn't go home with her (goofing around of course).

So this week, are usually flirty banter, I even decided to send her flowers this week. So, we're chatting yesterday (email, its always email), she's going away, we both had a rough weeks, etc. There was definitley some flirty stuff going on, then I say, "so will you miss me? " She writes back, "You'e sooooo nice, but I don't think I'm built for relationships "

I write back, "Who said anything about relationship? I just want to be in your life and take it from there." No response, which I'm not reading into too much. She goes away to vacation house every weekend and I leave her alone, there's no need for us to talk over the weekend.

I mean this woman is all over the place. She lets me closed the deal the first night, is all over to me to hang out more and more, then silence. I should add I was on vacation and she had a business conference soon after we first met. Oh, when I asked her why she wanted to meet for a drink. She said she really liked my follow ups and pictures I sent, and could tell that I was a genuine good guy and not some Manhattan player looking for one nighters (don't know how accurate that is )

She liked the idea of taking a step back, she obviously likes me, and then the whole "I'm not relationship built" line. ?? I have a feeling I may have fallen for a shit test, and might have failed. I just find it odd for a woman my age to be pulling crap like this...or maybe she's just confused and busy.

Anyway, my course of action I was thinking, was to just forget about it, and next week, go by as if nothing happend and our normal interactions.

I'm looking for other thoughts/insights. I expect this crap from a 25 yo, but an attractive, intelligent, ambitious entrenpeneur??

Anyway...

J.

I'm seeing her later tonight...