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Rejection. That one word is the source of so much fear in guys and its one of the top reasons men don't improve with women. What these men fail to realize is that rejection is a good thing.
Rejection exist for a reason. Rejection keeps people who are not compatible with one another away from each other. This is a very good thing! But why?
In order to get laid you must find woman who are open to getting laid and who you share a connection with. Rejection filters out all the women who fails to meet those two criteria. In essence rejection is a screening process. It filters out all the women who you are not going to have sex with and allows you to find the ones you can have sex with. Its a massive time saver.
If you never get rejected your going to waste a ton of time on women who have no intentions of ever dropping their pants for you.
I rather approach a woman and get instantly rejected than waste 20 minutes on her to only find that shes not a good prospect. By getting instantly rejected I have just saved 20 minutes than I can now use to find woman who are open to getting laid and who like me.
Go out, meet women and if you get rejected a lot, big deal. The more rejections you get the closer you get to getting laid. Everytime you get rejected your one chick closer to finding one that wants your dick.
Eventually (if you stick with it) you will get better and get rejected less and less but it will always exist. Embrace it.
I understand where you are coming from in regards to accepting rejection as a part of pick up. And to be able to accept it and move on.
To say it's a good thing? I disagree. Accept it yes. Embrace it as a good thing NO.
A lot of people think there is something to learn from rejection, but unless you are actually asking the woman why she is rejecting you, then how could you possibly learn from it. Other then realizing it's not the end of the world.
Also I hear a lot of people saying it will create confidence, but again, how is being turned down creating confidence. I accept rejection, not every woman is gonna want to be with me. They may have a million reasons and that is acceptable. But a GOOD THING??? hell no! Especially if it's happening all the time, and to people just starting it out. I would imagine it could be incredibly damaging to ones confidence.
The general consensus on this forum is to do pick up with approaches and words alone. I would like you all to try to see outside the box for a minute.
Verbalization is merely a small percentage of communication. There is many ways to approach a woman without even having to verbalize anything. There is way's to find out if a woman is interested or not without having to be verbally rejected ( can do more harm then good)
Almost all initial attraction is physical. Sure you can charm a woman, and seduce her with your words and wit. But your initial approach and her reactions are generally based on her level of attraction to you. Anyone can enhance that attraction with game. But if there is no initial attraction at least a little bit, your words are not going to matter. One can easily find out the level of a woman's attraction or approachability without even having to approach and engage in a conversation. If you know how to look for the signs, you can basically cut your potential rejection rate down to next to nothing.
In a club or social setting where you have a few hours, you can do micro approaches, get into their world. Say hello, then walk by, Smile at them, wink at them. dance in the general vicinity, introduce yourself to their friends. Start a friendly conversation with them, anything to get them to notice you. and then go back into their world later on, and actually see if they are showing you any type of interest. You could get into their line of site, show interest with your body language and get signs in return. The unconscious never lies. If you are within a woman's radar and you make your presence known, you can get a general idea of her interest.
Here's the thing, a lot of desirable women will reject your words even if they are attracted to you. But if you see the signs, physical and unconscious, you can keep pursuing, knowing it's just a shit test and she wants you to chase her. But if you are not aware of the signs you will most likely take the verbal rejection as a full on rejection.
Dont get me wrong, there is tons of women out there that are totally turned on by a mans intellect, but these are the women you must approach in a friendly manner, without any pick up intentions. If you are relying on your wit rather then your look, then be indirect. Show them your worth. But if you are going in trying to mack a woman and full on seduce her, then look for the signs first. Get good at spotting both good and bad. You can save face, if there is not any good physical interested signs and if you must still approach, you can change your tactics.
There is nothing wrong with being rejected, and it is wise to accept if for what it is, but by no means must you embrace it. It's not the proper mentality to have. If you went into a job interview with the mentality that it's ok if you dont get the job, their is a good chance you will not get the job.
Save your rejection acceptance for cold approaches, day game, etc, expect it, and you will not be surprised. Focus on learning how to approach without actually approaching verbally and I guarantee you, you will not only eliminate a lot of rejection, but you will also be extremely efficient in identifying the women that are interested and seduce-able.
CHAT
