A First



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 Post subject: A First
PostPosted: Wed Apr 11, 2012 11:33 pm 
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It's prom time and I'm a high school senior...

This is my first time asking anyone out so it was of course very bad. But the girls at my school are really nice and I'm pretty attractive so things sort of worked out.

Context:
We know each other, but I'm a senior and she's a junior so we don't really know each other at all. HB9. I decided to go natural.
I'm prez of a dance club and she's a member. When she comes my bro pushes me to act. I wait till I'm comfortable myself (bad move?)

Me: "Hey are you going to prom?"
HB9: "Yea I want to but blahblah no guy blah blah if a guy blahblah"
Me: "Let's go together."
HB9: "omg really ok"
Me: "Yea we can just go as friends" (faillll)

Awkwardness ensues. Although music is blasting so it's not bad.


So some things that I did well were:
-Approached
-I forced myself to approach right at 5:30, limiting myself.

Some weaknesses:
-Visibly shy (I felt it so it must have shown)
-No kino
-I didn't even say her name
-Awkward overall


Hope people starting out can learn from this. I would like some pointers on what to do from here. I'm really just looking for a casual relationship. Why am I not smooth as I imagine myself.......


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Apr 12, 2012 5:25 pm 
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Joined: Mon Aug 02, 2010 7:54 pm
Posts: 155
Location: Michigan
*facepalm*

It's okay, bud. It's always easier looking from the outside in. You framed the interaction in a way where the future of the situation rests solely on how well you can communicate to her that you are sexually interested (I'm assuming casual relationship means you want to bang her).

You already killed it with "we can just go as friends," as I'm sure you're well aware.

So right, you've got to sexualize the situation now. You can start before prom even kicks off. Talk to her from time to time, but don't be so readily available that you are overbearing. I can talk all day about do's and don'ts, but the truth is, you just have to nut up and be confident with yourself, and everything else falls into place.

Some things that have helped me step it up recently...
-Stand closer to her. Like, nose to nose close, when you're talking.
-Talk slowly and use pauses. It makes you more deliberate and sensual.
-Think about making love to her and hold eye contact.
+When I say eye contact, I mean look through her, not at her. The latter makes it weird.
-Touch her like a man touches a woman, not like a scared boy touches a hot girl. What do I mean by this? Be firm and deliberate with your actions, but not rough. Hold her hand in yours while you're talking, place your palm on her waist, pull her slowly to you by the hand when you want to say something quietly, etc. Just use your head here.

Watch the other guys at school, and you'll notice that the kids who aren't successful will be standing back a few steps and just chatting it up whereas the guys who are leaning in on chicks have a better chance. It's not because they're nerds and douchebags respectively, it's because the "douchebags" have more confidence. Just take a breath and be your awesome self. Sometimes keeping a few things in mind will help you to focus, though. Hope that was helpful, man.


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