Fellas,

I've become "friendly" with one of the barmaids at my local bar. She's recently sent me various FB messages saying things like "Yeah, we should definitely have drinks together when I'm back from foliday." etc. She also "liked" a link that I had on my FB, although I know that doesn't mean a lot!

So.... How do I up the ante? I obviously don't wanna be LJBF! This in itself might get tricky, as we've already socialised with other friends on nights when she wasn't working behind the bar, etc.

I'm thinking possibly some heavy (ish) negging? She's hot, she probably has lots of guys hitting on her, and I presume that she KNOWS she's hot!

I don't want to put her on a pedestal! It's just that she IS very hot, and I wanna give myself the best possible chance of NOT fucking things up! Haha!

Not sure if this was an error or not, but the other day I FB messaged her with :

"You looked hot last night! Really beautiful! Pity you're not my type! "

Mistake, or good neg?

Cheers for any help & advice guys!

p.s. She MIGHT be there tonight, so any swift replies will be much appreciated!

Do yourself a favor and DONT neg her. Negs are just a bad idea, period, and generally relegated to newbies who have limited experience with women and feel that what they've got to offer, or who they are isn't enough to attract a woman.

Instead be authentic, and natural. The girl has some level of interest if she's indicated that the two of you should go for drinks. Be real, rather than coming across as some goofball who just read The Game and thinks by hurling quasi insults/off-handed 'compliments' her way will woo her.

Approaching things with the mentality "I had better not fuck up" will likely become a self-fulfilling prophecy, so get your head straight before you go out to meet her. You'd be better served in going in there with the mentality that you're prizeworthy and that you're meeting with her to see if she's compatible for YOU, not the other way around.

Thanks dude. I DO have high self-confidence. I believe that I'm a good person with lots to offer. My previous post wasn't intended to sound downbeat or defeatist. I just want to be sure to game her well!

I forgot to mention that the lat time I saw her,we were with other friends. I forget the exact conversation or what context it was in, but at one point she said "I'm not looking for a boyfriend." I replied with "Neither am I. I'm not into fellas!" This made her laugh.

I'm not sure whether she intended this comment to be just for me, or for the whole group to hear, but anyway... do you think the fact she's (allegedly) "not looking" means I should just give up on this one?

Cheers!

A lot of guys here will chime in with what they think you should do. A lot of the advice unfortunately will be very very bad and a detriment to your game if some of the other threads are any indicator.

What you're doing so far worked! Have faith in your approach. Be natural, be yourself make her laugh, have a positive energy about you and the rest will fall into place.

Her "not looking" can mean any number of things. I'd frame it as simply a speed bump, a way of slowing the guy down so as to give you a better chance with her. In other words, many guys will get ahead of themselves and come off as needy, her "not looking" give her 1) an out if she determines she's not interested in you, or 2) a way of helping ensure you don't fast approach and come off as every other needy guy out there. Don't get caught up in "not looking", focus on the behavior more, the non-verbals as they convey 3/4 of communication...body talk.

In PUA lingo, I see no harm in viewing it as a "shit/congruency test" to weed out the guys who are wililng to persist from the weaker and sensitive types who'd cower and run off, having the fear of rejection overtake them.

Either way you choose to frame it, don't be phased by it. HOWEVER, the 'speed bump' way I spoke of earlier would suggest that you build comfort more with her before escalating, which would be my recommendation particularly given the fact that you 2 don't know each other very well at this point in time.

Thanks. I will bear all of this good advice in mind!

In a nutshell, what you're saying is that I should just be as "alpha" as possible? Have confidence in myself & my positive qualities, and use them to my advantage?

Sounds good! Thanks again!

You're about to end up in the friend zone if you're not already there. Looks like all your doing is trying to be funny and its getting no where fast cut the BS and just ask her out just the 2 of you no friends invited and you better try to at least kiss close or you're done for.

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Hi Naithiz here. Im new to the world of PUA so dont take what i say to deeply, but from the sound of it your game is good she is trying to get with you. so if you push/pull her I think that would work well. Try bringing a girl with you to go drinking. Shows self worth, makes her want you cause someone else wants you. Just my suggestion.

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Dont listen to this guy, seriously. Just regurgitating some fast escalation bs that he read in a ebook which would likely lead to rejection, and would land you in the creepo category fast.

Scrap all the be "alpha" bullshit. Just be confidant in yourself, have faith in your approach it has worked thus far, and you know the girl better than any of us do so trust in your gut. You already know what to do.


The funniest thing of all with this PUA bullcrap is that they say "you've got to be this particular type of guy" and then sell you on the promise of making you that kind of guy. It's all just an ingenious marketing formula that's been used time and time again. Convince people they're deficient in some manner, and then lure them in with the prospect of offering an easy solution.

Thanks for the advice guys! I'll take it on board!

Happy gaming to you all!

Coming from a complete noob who just signed up today follow my post kid you might actually reach puberty and even better you might actually get laid. No on second thought you're too much scrub to get laid that'll never happen.

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Reo is right here.

Kiss her before its too late. Gotta grab your balls to make sure theyre still there then prepare to use them. Go for a kiss close then escalate.

Yes, because a guy who expends most of his energies on a site on how to pickup women certainly has a lot to boast about....

Hope your 'reputation points' serve you well. Perhaps you can get a PUA comb or toothpick, or maybe save up for a while and get that Neil Strauss plushy you've always had your eye on - think big, sky's the limit!

Only thing I can learn from you is how to become a master Creepo. Thanks, but I prefer my current approach to scoring WOMEN, while you can bask in your glory in the shallow end of the pool messing around with insecure little girls who anyone with a candy bar and some fishing line can reel in without having so much as an ounce of skill.

Cool story bruh!

You have to attack people on this forum? You're so egoic. Literally your ego is through the roof.

If you do have sex with women, it's like a notch in your belt to you (although you could easily lie on this forum, we all can). That's not the way to live man, figure your self-image out.

Why so much hostility?