Hey Fellas,

My last relationship just fell apart, due to trust issues. I never trusted her, but I didn't have much reason not to. I am starting to realize I do not trust women in general. Or people for that matter.

I am a very sensitive guy, I honestly felt like the woman in my last relationship, to some extent, because my x was emotionally void. I tend to and did pick up on a lot of small details, over analyze them and soon I would feel like it was reason not to trust her. I have done this with many woman.

On a larger scale I feel like no woman is trustworthy because a skilled PUA could potentially chink the integrity of the most loyal woman when she was out with her friends.

Does anyone feel the same way on this matter with me? Should an Alpha be trusting? Or Does the Alpha just not care. I feel a lot more than most guys so I have a hard time being an Alpha male.

I know I trust more when I feel more secure about myself. But this feeling of security comes in waves and I generally never know how I will feel one night from another.


-Astartes2

The bad news is, you are right about everything you say.

You really can't trust people. People are complicated, they have complex agendas, and acts unpredictably. That's just human nature. If you live in a Lala land where you hope that people are trustworthy, you're just going to disappoint yourself even more.

the good news is, that you don't have to frame it as a bad thing, or attach negative emotion to it (which I think you are doing a little bit).

You need to understand this is reality, and it's not a good thing or a bad thing. It just is what it is. By learning pickup, you are learning how to make the best of the situation. You are “seeing the matrix.”

_________________
Elliott Gordon
Owner of Authentic Online Dating Tips For Men
Visit by clicking the [link] below.
http://www.wheretofindgirl.com

Good talk man, thanks for responding. If what you say is true i need to reevaluate my situation.

now another question, what do people mean when they say "you need to trust yourself?"

What you wrote there rings true, man. It has happened to me. It's a side effect of reading and practicing all this material based on evolutionary psychology. We may be evolved animals with an unconscious agenda to reproduce, but I question the sanity of anyone claiming we are nothing more than that.

Do you have any guy friends outside of the pickup community?

If not, go out and make some. If so, spend more time with them. Spend less time on pickup and more time on creating genuine relationships with others built on trust. Give people genuine compliments. Be humble sometimes. Stop worrying about low or high value.

As far as being an alpha male, think about this: Could any dictator, king, tribal ruler, government leader, CEO, or other business executive attain or keep his position without help from others based on trust? The rulers who lose the trust of their subordinates suffer a coup d'etat.

Of course some people aren't trustworthy, and you learn to avoid them, but in general most people are honest. Perpetuating the conversation about untrustworthiness just breeds more of the same. (Which is one reason why I got away from the pickup community) In general, after reading this statement, do you trust this guy:
BTW, Sorry you feel that way, EG. Best of luck to you.

Hope that helps, Astartes

_________________
Live Your Truth.

Well..reality is all that stuff is your crap aka your internal projections. If you view the world through such a filter thats what your going get by default. Further..you nit picking is just you self-sabatoging. Was she emotionally void? Maybe maybe not..I don't know I personally don't care. Point is..why would you associate with someone like that and further if its an on-going pattern, theres only 1 common denominator- YOU.

As an aside...it just sounds like your looking for valdiation and not willingly to be vulnerable. So if you are doing that..what do you expect the people around you to do. They follow your example.

So in regards to your past relationship, well..sounds like you have trust issues in yourself- whatever it is which then manifested externally. Are all people like you? No..however your going attract people like that around you, so it becomes a vicious cycle. You want to trust? Start trusting/having faith in yourself and digging into your past memories/emotional crap you closed the door on and start accepting it. And if its comes in "waves"..your probaly just brushing it off then it comes back- and its a repeated cycle.

Further drop this notion of "alpha" out of your head. The most alpha person doesn't know he's alpha and just "is". Stop limiting your experience to "what you think" something is. Life is fluid, stop categorizing things like "is an alpha trusting or not trusting". Reality is he's both and neither at the same time..again he is depending on the CONTEXT of the situation taking all things into consideration. Both internally/externally.

If your interested in doing something about this; then read & pratice the thread: "Core values of a man" in this forum section.