A few years ago, before I discovered the community, I became interested in a girl.

I was young, and looking to get into my first relationship. This chick seemed attractive enough, and we connected on an intellectual level, so I thought why not? We started dating.

Initially, I enjoyed the relationship. But as time passed, I become more and more miserable. I would spend hours anxiously waiting for her to text me back. We didn't have sex for months. When I wasn't with her I was incredibly paranoid that she might be cheating. But I loved her. Or at least, I thought I did. More simply, I was addicted to her. And she'd hooked me using the same techniques WE use here in the community!

She'd frequently use jealousy plot-lines in subtle ways. That was her main tactic, and that's what made me so paranoid. But she'd do a lot of negging as well. And she would always take a matter of hours to text me back, and it would always be incredibly difficult to have sex with her.

Sounds awful, right? But like I said, I loved her. She trained me that way. And it's only now, in retrospect, I see to what extent I was being gamed. I remember we'd have fights; I'd say to her "You're playing games with me," and she'd reply by making me doubt myself - saying things like "You're crazy," and "It's all in your head."

Make sure you can recognize when girls are using our own techniques against us. Train yourself to look at things objectively. And, realize the power you have as a PUA. You can use your skills to make someone fall in love with you, but you can also make someone miserable. There's a line.

Does anyone else have experience with girls like this? I've since had some great relationships, but it took me an age to get over her, because of the hold she had on me. I'm grateful it happened, though - I learnt a lot from it.

Actually it is us who use their techniques.

Or rather, they are common attraction mechanisms, but girls normally have more training than guys have, hence, we normally dont know about it.

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I'm not trying to be a dick Ezo, but you're being a Pick Up Snob in my opinion.

bbardot: you just reminded me about porn

for all I know I was your ex girlfriend, I am a girl like this.

I had a short relationship like the one you described- the guy was beta and could not handle a hand full like me. I felt horrible for hurting his feelings. I ended things as soon as I could.
I left him hurt but I inspired him to look at life in different ways and stimulated and motivated him to go after his dreams. This was all before I got in touch with PU.

At this point in time , I would never date a guy like that .So I would safe any guy being really miserable over me.
I would talk to him and maybe kiss him on a night out though , because he is a nice guy.
Leave him feeling like he is the man , he is special - basically boost his entire confidence.

So PU is not only saving me from wasting time but also guys being miserable over me.

I agree with you - there is a line - Which many PUAS cross.

Next time , don't date girls you cant handle or show her who is the boss .

Goodluck on using your skills on these type of girls - they are a handful .

In Soviet Russia, HB's Game PUA's.

Thanks for the correction - I agree. Reminds me of something Style said; "To become a PUA is to become more female."

Thank you! I have since dated girls who would ordinarily be much more of a handful than my first girlfriend. I firmly believe that it's all down to the initial impression and attraction. It's crucial. That's when the girl learns how alpha the guy is and what she can get away with. I'm alpha right from the outset now, so I never find myself in a beta position.

I think this is why guys never get their "oneitis." It's too late in the game - the rules have been written, the girl knows he's beta, and it's very difficult if not impossible for him to change that. Same goes for trying to convert LJBFs if the guy's "betaness" is firmly entrenched. That's why I think it's much more viable to go out and meet new girls and make a good impression from the outset than try to convert existing friends. The latter is possible - but potentially a lot more work.

sounds interesting, i would love to meet a girl like this, to see whos the boss

It's to become more masculine.

If you become more female then you merely wait for girls to pick you up and then just pace the situation rather than lead it.

Good luck doing that. . .

Also OP if by game you mean - a girl speaking to you to lead the interaction to sex then send them my way!

Not sure if you're getting "being a bitch" mixed up with game.

Jealousy plot-lines aren't to hurt her feelings in a relationship but to make a girl realise that you are in fact a scarcity, socially high value and/or have at the very least other options.

It's not meant to hurt feelings, you wouldn't meet a girl in a bar, get on great, build a real deep connection then go blow your load on some skanks titties in front of her.

JP's main use is when a girl will speak to you but not allow you to escalate or is a bit cold which is just a girl playing the game really otherwise she would have left.

You've misunderstood. Females are more socially calibrated and better at using the attraction mechanisms in "the game." We're just catching up.

Explain what you mean, I genuinely don't understand. As far as i can see, you've gotten things mixed up.

Attraction isn't tooling someone as it seems you said happened, or at least think happened to you.

You still seem stuck in the "women are out to get me" stage. Nothing you pointed out is to do with game but with manipulation. Actually to me, it seems you just saw and heard things and took it as JP's and Negging but really were nothing but socialising and being playful.

Seriously I'm not trying to attack you but what it sounds like. Attraction tools and being mean are 2 totally different things!

Haha, I'm not too sure what you mean either. I can't be bothered arguing but the point of this post is that I found myself in an unpleasant relationship because of a girl who was manipulative and very good at using attraction mechanisms, as opposed to being "mean." If you still don't understand that, it doesn't really matter.

Basically action youre just saying that what got you hooked on the girl is what gets girls hooked up on us, its all just attraction techniques

Basically, girls have more training because every time they go out, they are approached by a number of guys. Imagine how good you would be if you have been in 10+ sets every time you went out since the age of whenever you started going out. Girls know more about social interaction even though they dont have a name for it. And they love talking about it with their friends (gossip), which is great for further understanding.

If you can get to that level of understanding or beyond, and if you can start understanding how a girl thinks, you will see that they are just guys with tits and a different outlook on reality. Basically, they are Johnny Depp. There are millions of people who wanna sleep with them and they dont really have to do anything apart from selecting the best. Then of course, the people they are attracted to are way bigger and stronger than them so thats a bit scary too. Plus they are biologically investing more in having sex (leading to 9 months of pregnancy and a kid), these things are in the cavewoman part of the brain so dont give me that BS about nowadays we have condoms.

Basically, if you truly understand those points, you will start understanding women. That is what he meant about that we need to become more female.

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I'm not trying to be a dick Ezo, but you're being a Pick Up Snob in my opinion.

bbardot: you just reminded me about porn

Gaming does not end after you succeed and get a girl you liked into a relationship with you.
My current girlfriend (and the ones before) always shit-test me, even in a much greater impact when you are a couple.
she'll shit-test you again and again, and will see how much you are moved by that...
(relationship is the "hardest" pickup)

Anyways, this is a thing we all should thank because it'll keep you in the edge.
I actually keep on flirting with girls ALL OF THE TIME, even though my girlfriend does not like this. I tell her that is who I am and that's how I swing in life...
I do this so I can always be on top and not move when she tries to crash out some couple shit-test stuff on me..
Sometimes I do the opposite & give her the token and do stuff for her, give her the strong affirmations about her being special and great for you.
Girls sometimes even want you to act a bit "jealous" because that really makes their value soar.

When it comes to women & men, the game does not stop