If you have spent time already getting to know her, I suggest doing something that she will enjoy. You will show her you have been paying attention by suggesting something she likes.

If she has her own place, or at least enough privacy to host an over night stay. I suggest you end the evening with drinks. that way she will offer for you to stay the night.

_________________
Seduce their mind and the rest will follow.

Hey SA, I've been following your advice and it's been going pretty well! I made the realization that if you're sincerely nice to girls, they will appreciate it. Somehow I had a previous belief of girls as an object that naturally opposed my own desires...

Well, I have started befriending several girls, and am starting to learn more about them. This brings me to wonder, how viable is a long term relationship with a girl? Can you give me some general advice on starting and keeping relationships? How does one enjoy the relationship while maintaining their own self (as in, not fall into becoming a "nice guy")?

Also, I'd like to know your own personal philosophy. What's your stance on marriage? Do people just settle for what they can get after they realize they're getting old, or are there really some close-to-ideal marriage situations out there?

I realize these aren't typical PUA questions, but I'd like a perspective from someone who's been with MANY girls and arguably understands them better than standard/stock married men.

Somewhere in this thread you claimed to be the typical "bad boy" ...
on the other hand your main strategy is "being extremely polite" to women.
How does this go together?

Cheers,
me.

Sexaddict its me again from a few posts above.... thanks for the follow up advice, I have more questions.

Progress report: Went out last Saturday night and hit up the club, it was good danced with a bunch of girls and grinded them up. Did not do any making out this time which was understandable since the venue wasn't really prone to that type of interaction. I still consider this a success though since I had fun and had interaction. Tomorrow night, I am hitting up a previous place I went to which is a little bit more wild with college aged students. Expecting more "contact' hah.

Anyway here we go with some questions.....

1. Most of the time I am going solo to these nightclubs. I don't seem to care or mind, but what are your thoughts? Have you had any issues with this? I have one concern is when the place is closing down and people are exiting its a great time to actually talk to girls, but I would obviously be pretty exposed as being alone. You say screw it and just approach?

2. How do you deal with girls in clubs you previously hooked up with? The assumption here is that we are no longer talking and it ended. Just ignore them and their friends? thoughts?

This question is related to the gym game....

I work out daily and take it seriously. The gym as always been place for me to go and enjoy myself outside of work. Well now that I am really out of serious relationship I really want to start opening up more girls here and building more social connections. I want to be conservative since its a "working class professional" gym with girls post college and I also don't want a rep. as a predator.

here is the question/story...

3. While I was exciting the treadmill a new hot girl was walking in and we came very close, I held strong eye contact (wasnt even planning on it) and I hooked her. Few minutes later, I caught her checking me out while I was lifting weights in the vicinity. I did make it clear I was checking her out too, but I really felt like she was craving for attention from me. While I was lifting weights on the machine behind her, she adjusted/lifted the back of her shirt to make sure her butt was in full view with her tight workout pants. What would you do? Do I just charge over there and strike up a conversation while she is on the elliptical ? The logistics were awful since she was isolated on this machine and I was doing weights. Just looking for your take on how girls would view me approaching them in that aggressive way.

The other time I opened a girl at the gym it was more planned. She was going to the water fountain and I ensured I was right behind her and started talking her up.


Thanks bro!~

12:24AM EST update - just got back from hitting up a new bar/club in my area. It was packed with good looking people. Everyone was standing around though and no one was dancing. Again, I was alone here cruising around. Whats the best strategy in a situation like this? Normally, I would just go to the dance floor and start dancing with girls to work my way in.

A long term relationship is very viable, but it all comes down to timing, effort and mutual goals in life. I am probably not the best guy to ask about long term relationships, but I have been around long enough and understand relationships and people in general. It really comes down to how honest and open you can be with your significant other and your ability to forge a true friendship.( A good relationship is a friendship on fire) Any successful long term relationships that I know of always consists of a strong bond of friendship and mutual respect.

I Know tons of people that stayed in a LTR for all the wrong reasons, and now they are seperated, bitter and have children that surely suffer. Just look at the divorce rate, especially in north America.

I have known couples to stay together for 6-10 years and now they basically hate each other. It's truly sad, as they are both usaully awesome individuals.


If you see couples that argue a lot, they are doomed.


To keep it simple, there is nothing wrong with trying to find your soul mate. Date every girl that gives you a woody or that awesome gut feeling, get dumped, do the dumping, get hurt, fall in love. It's all the recipe to finding a true love. However! you can also be wise, know exactly when to cut it off. Cutting it off is critical, you're simply not gonna find your match right away, and if you do, you're a lucky man. Some people spend entire their lives trying to find the perfect mate.

You also have to stay true to your convictions, once you end a relationship you must let it go, believe in your own assessment of it and your decision to end it. No matter how hot she is, or how comfortable it seems. Your ability to erase it from your thoughts and take all the positive you can out of the experience, whether you got dumped or she did, will dictate how successful you will be in finding a true relationship. Time is precious. Life can get in the way fast.

Always go out and get laid as soon as possible after a break up. It helps in so many ways.


Cut of signs. ( I am sure some readers can add to this, and I hope they do)


Arguing more then twice a week and usually escalates.
You have to lie to her just to keep the peace.
She starts trying to change you.
It's hard to have a real conversation.
You don't respect her.
She doesn't respect you.
She has a lot of guy friends.
She doesn't give head.
You don't get along unless alcohol or drugs are involved.
She is too needy
You are too needy
You become a pussy ( literally develop a vagina and she bends you over the table)
You loose attraction
She flirts with your friends.
She is secretive.

etc etc etc etc

In my opinion, marriage is just a piece of paper. People truly in love are already married within. The "sacred bond" is already there. Marriage is just an out of date ritual, that used to signify ownership of a woman. We live in 2012. There is merit in marriage, showing the ultimate commitment. But what good is that when 10 yrs later your not even together anymore. So many people do it for the wrong reasons. Family/religion/comfort/fear. Just like an LTR they stay together out of comfort and fear. ( fear of being alone, fear of starting over. fear/fear/fear) When they both know they are not right for each other.

People do this all the time, Society has set a standard and ideal age and lifestyle. People are sheep, they must conform. Don't be a sheep. Do it for the right reasons.


I broke up with a incredible woman she was virtually perfect, intelligent, gorgeous, caring, empathic and had an awesome character. I end it simply because of her desire to get married. We had only been dating for a year. Yet she wanted to get married. Simply because she had a life long desire to be married by the age of 30. She was 29. I couldn't believe it, I had told her we are not best friends yet. And that has to happen. but she kept pushing it. She pushed it so much I had to end it.

It sucked, but I stayed true to my conviction and it became a lot easier. She later thanked me after 4 months of stalking me and a couple years past.

In my opinion to find a true relationship, it must start with a true friendship.

Think about it this way, look at yourself, and some of your true friends. You can sometimes hate them, but you remain friends. You don't just walk away from them. When times are bad. This is what a real relationship must be.

_________________
Seduce their mind and the rest will follow.

Being polite is not my main strategy. My main strategy is understanding the woman I am addressing. Being polite is simply getting me in the game.

I am a gentleman with bad boy tendencies. Always be a gentleman first. This is the " opening the door" "getting your foot in" But just like any door to door salesman, you must still sell your product. YOU! Change gears once you are in the door. I am lucky as I have a bad boy persona. It simply is who I am, I have lived a rough life. But I have learned not to live in the past, so I am a very happy person.

Girls like the bad boy, or the reformed bad boy. So if you're just looking to get laid. Creating a bad boy image ( at least on the surface) can surely help you out.

_________________
Seduce their mind and the rest will follow.

Try to stay away from the grinding. It gives off a" typical male" vibe. If a girls tries to come grind you, simply grab her hips and hold her away. Even if you want to, refuse it. You are letting other women see you grinding and losing value. If you are into the girl and she wants to grind. Make sure you're taking her home that night or at least getting the digits. Don't devalue yourself anymore. If you have a good vibe about you and your getting lots of attention, that means girls are watching you. If you are going to the same bar all the time, it can hamper your future prospects.

Don't just grind with a girl to have fun, have a purpose, make it a part of a seduction.

Besides, girls always want what they can't have. By resisting these women, they will remember you. You need to develop some attitude and shows you are not typical.

This is the best time to be alone, If questioned, you can say anything. your friends left, you stopped in for a drink and stayed. it really doesn't matter. It's the exact time you want to be alone. Everyone is drunk. nobody even cares. Just be confident, and nothing else matters.

I always tried to keep moving. Never really stay at one club consistently, or I would not go as often. But if you keep running into these women, it's wise to make friends with them even if they hold grudges. Women are evil when they want to be, so it's best to be on their good side. They can screw up all your pick up attempts without you even knowing it.


Stay away from hitting on girls in the gym, It's your place to work out. as it is hers. Keeping it friendly is the way to go. In fact don't show any type of interest until a mutual respect is established, or at least a decent rapport. ( It's a sanctuary to dedicated people) Do not approach the women while they are working out. What you did previous worked well as it was at the water fountain and planned. If you want to approach a girl, wait till they are done or at the water fountain, leaving, coming in, etc etc. Never while exercising. There is many reasons behind this. Even if it worked, it is still ( in my opinion) showing poor class.

_________________
Seduce their mind and the rest will follow.

Hello! - I just got back home and tried out your advice of taking on a more dignified approach to working the club. At first it was a little rough because I was trying to go back to my old tendencies of "grinding" up anything. Well this time, I didn't.

I danced casually and checked out what was going on. I worked my way into a pocket full of 4 -5 girls dancing. I was dancing casually and caught the eye of one of them in the group. I still kept dancing but made solid eye contact. Ignored her for a little bit and caught her checking me out several times out of the corner of my eye. There was a bunch of texting going on between her friends and I saw them also checking me out. I seemed to get good approval since no one moved from me. I could tell I had her hooked and she put herself out there as if saying "dance" behind me. I resisted... kept saying "girls want what they can't have" hah!

But here is my question, once you have them hooked like this what would you do? do you approach them ? (eventually her friends decided to physically leave the club for the night) I felt like she probably was disappointed.

I definitely pulled off the whole "classy" thing and I felt like they wanted me verus me trying to get them. It was awesome power, just need to know tactics to harness it into digits. The classy but bad boy image is cool cause I felt like I was placed in a "higher league" and would be worth of dating or boyfriend material. Not just "I will grind this guy and ignore him afterward"

Your advice is solid and I appreciate your help.

How do you tell a woman its not gonna work out with her after youve already had sex?

If you cant date them exclusively, because you are addicted to the chase of sleeping with other women.

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I'ma be what I set out to be, without a doubt undoubtedly, and all those who look down on me I'm tearin down your balcony, no if ands or buts, don't try to ask him why or how can he

Surely you have a better question then this. Wtf dude! you're killing me. lol


It all comes down to the woman and how hard i had to work to get the goods.

Generally I give the women the impression I am not looking for anything serious. so it's easy. But sometimes I have to show more interest then i want to just to get the goods.

I have done everything from completely ignoring a girl till she stops to coming right out and saying I am not interested to having to devalue myself so that they would believe they were discarding me. This question is too vague dude. There is a million answers.

_________________
Seduce their mind and the rest will follow.

Awesome! this is what I hope for you to see. This is the way to build confidence especially if you are frequenting this club. Set your standards higher, believe that it is their privilege to be around you, but without being arrogant or cocky.

You will be surprised at how observant women are and how they start to gravitate towards you. If they have seen you a couple of times, they are checking you out, watching what you do.

If you passed all of their inner shit tests as they watch you, they will make their way to you or at least help guide you to them.

Just remember, don't be typical. Stand out!

_________________
Seduce their mind and the rest will follow.

Could you give me some techniques about highschool? When it starts, how to directly make attention? I wan't to be the wild badboy trying to get laid without having a girlfriend.. So yeah. Any player advices would be useful. And, I know 2 sluts which is going to the same highschool. And I want to be better friend with them. I need to show my sexual site, but I always feel of getting rejected since they will think that im only their friend to fuck them.. What do you think?

Hit on all the hot girls, don't be afraid, don't worry about rejection. If you get rejected, just laugh it off as if they are crazy. You have to make them believe you have all kinds of girls on the go already. High school is all about status and reputation. If you don't have that, I suggest you start trying to create it. It's actually one of the only places where the more of a player you are, the more attention you will get from girls. The best way to get attention in school is to bring around good looking girls from other schools. Or build a reputation of being a bad ass. Social status is important too. Popularity is probably the best way to gain status. Be friendly with everyone but have an edge with the girls.

_________________
Seduce their mind and the rest will follow.

Could you give me some examples on how to hit on them?