Don, I have one major sticking point when it comes to my text game. I'm great one on one, making her laugh, push/ pull, getting the number, etc. The problem I'm having is that I don't know how to create a comfort level through texting. I feel as though If I text her a lot or if the conversation dies down then I'm out and she loses interest so I don't text girls very often. Any tips?

Well, to be fair, I don't see an obvious sign of interest in her replies or her behavior, but that could also be attributed to your way of playing the situation at hand. I mean, if you want a sexual outcome, you need to be sexual.. same way for flirty outcomes and such. Try to align your behavior with your final goal and you'll never go astray with your strategy.

Also, start being a bit more direct and obvious with her, no more "Hey! How are you? How was your day? What did you do?" crap.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

It's not "ok", it is EXPECTED that you atleast kiss the girl on the first date. I mean, that depends on how far she can let the situation go with you and how good you are at building the attraction but ATLEAST a kiss or five is expected at the end of a good first date.

So, don't hesitate. Escalate verbally and more importantly, physically. Get a copy of the DiCarlo Escalation Ladder, if you haven't already.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

That highlighted text is excellent. I always tell guys in her to be more descriptive of the situations and inject some imagination and adjectives to elicit an emotional response from the girl and you did perfectly here. Well done. Hence, the positive reply on the next text.

Now, the next is where you mis-stepped, the situation was described, now you had to include her and you together in that. A text like..

"Yeah, when I go there I would so ask you for a dance and do the tango/samba/whatever dance you do with you. It would be amazing. "

Now, with something as simple as that, you've got her to imagine you and her in the same situation and having a good time. You're in her fantasy, you've just associated yourself with her positive emotions.

And to be fair, always leave the conversation on a high note with the positive feelings on the peak, leave her wanting more of you and she will be looking eagerly for your next text. I cannot emphasize that enough.

Moving on..
Grieving people need time and space. You should give them that.

"I have felt what you're going through right now. I'll leave you to your space and time."

Trust me, she'd appreciate that you were willing to concede ground to her, for her. Brownie points. Offering a shoulder too much, comes off as needy and desperate. Try to avoid that in the future.
So, let's see :

1 - You are initiating all the conversations with her. That's never a good thing. Shows a lack of investment on her part.

2 - She's making a ton of excuses to not see you. Another red flag.
Staggering disinterest from her side. I think you're reading too much into things. She seems polite and nice, not flirty, not sexual, not anything more.

Lot's of 'hahahaha". Well, laughter is the side effect of tension human beings can't deal with. And tension is good. Keep up the direct flirting, but try to make it more blunt and inject some sexuality, for God's sake. I have heard nothing about her body or how desirable you find her. You need to understand that those who talk sexual fast, get laid faster. Cause women appreciate men who don't BS them with sweet talk.
One step forward, ten steps back.
Weird line. Hence, I always frown on canned material. 7 times out of 10, it is cringe-inducing shit. Don't use that stuff. Be your normal self. You'll be fine.
Ta-Da!

I called it. Disinterest through and through. I think you left it too late and blew the situation here.
Freeze her out. Yeah, I've read the whole next updated part, but you really have lost perspective with this girl. Don't message, don't call, don't be overly interested, don't talk to her too much. Just be distant, find other members of the female population in your city and go after them. Trust me, she'll miss the attention. But,you don't have to give a shit about that. It's about you and your perspective, not about her.

Be formal, keep her at arm's length. And don't talk with her too much. Let her text you asking what's wrong and shit. Don't worry, she's just missing one admirer. That's all.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

She's basically throwing herself at you, man.

I mean, come on, how can you be so blind to so obvious messages of intent.

Let's see..

"u can always crash here if need be."

"too bad. lol"

That's got "I WANT YOU" written all over it.

Anyway, I think you need to re-think your last message. It positively makes no sense. I mean, I understand the emotion behind it, but it comes out as a logical WTF and that's no good. If you want to enforce a sexual frame, use direct language, make it blunt even, women are more turned on by primitive usage of words than some sophisticated witty flirting, no matter what Hollywood films might want to show.

Take these pointers and commit to them. And learn to read between the lines better.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

OPENING - Keep it intriguing, initially. Texts with open ended statements or direct questions work reasonably well. Stuff like "Something made me think of you today.." or "You won't believe what just happened to me.." gets replies cause these statements demand her mind to ask WHAT and that's a good thing. After a certain duration, opening doesn't matter, you can open her with a " " and you'll get a reply, assuming you've built the requisite attention and comfort.

MID-LEVEL - No usual "How was your day?" or "How are you?" crap here. Waste no time in expressing your intent. You want to attract this woman, sleep with her and you want to do that as fast as you can. Be honest about your intentions from the start, be direct with your words. Use things like descriptions of events which you can see yourself together with her at, or situations involving you and her. Try to use topics which can lead to deep conversations. Try to understand her thinking process by asking her the reasons behind her answers. Seem interested in what she has to say. At the same time, shift gears. Be vague sometimes, be open others. Sometimes, be very blunt, other times be coy. Show her that you've a deep personality. Women love that kind of 'depth' shit.

CLOSING - Again TELL her more than you ASK her. If you want her to come out with you. Tell her that you're taking her out this weekend at so and so place and at so and so time. Tell her how to dress for the place and what time you'll pick her up. As a man, you should want to LEAD and she would like to see you take the lead here. Stop pussy-footing around and just go for it, when you think she won't say NO or when the chances of YES are greater than NO. Whatever.

I hope you got your outline here.

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" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

Comfort is directly related to sharing.

Now, that could be sharing of pasts, events, feelings, thoughts, emotions blah blah blah blah.

You just need to ask those questions and more importantly, frame them in a way that she starts sharing more and more of those things with you. At the same time, understand a very fundamental point here, that this is a two way process, if you want her to share, then you'll have to share too. But, keep the amount of sharing equal. Hard to measure, but it's crucial to not go over the top when she's just revealing bits and pieces.

For example, if you want to ask about her childhood..

INTERVIEWER: So, tell me about your childhood?

PUA: Something tells me you were a naughty child, were you now?

See? Different isn't it? And you can think for yourself, which one she'd be more likely to respond to and in more depth.

Playing with words is a crucial skill. Read books, watch movies. Keep the selection classy and you'll soon become a smooth bastard.

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" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

made a new topic, but this is probably the correct place for this. Not trying to double post, moderators can please go ahead and delete the my other post if need be.

Long story short. Met girl. Hooked up first night. Text game went well all week. Her and her friends we're going to meet us out downtown (where i live)..they live in burbs.

Towards the end of the texting...

HB: Haha alright...well we're gonna get ready here in a little so we might get down there by the time y'all wanna head to the bars

...nothing for a couple hours

(she mentioned earlier a friend was taking a nap, and they were waiting on her)

ME: Still taking a nap?

HB: Ugh no...no one wanted to go downtown bc ppl couldn't make up their minds. So we didn't go. Lame I now. hopefully next weekend it'll work out or something.

...at this point I was drunk, was going to think of something good to say back..then forgot about it.

So what's my move here? Do I have to contact her since she made last contact and I didn't respond. Or shoudl I wait to see if she texts me during the week? I can provide more details if needed.

There is a shy girl in my class that sits with 2 other girls. 1 of them is loud, a little rude. She is the alpha of that group. S I have opened the group and she just sat there staring at the floor while the loudest girl spoke to me. I couldn't get the quiet girl open up. Any ideas?

i met this girl last november but things kinda fizzled out due to me loosing interest and gaming like a gump. I drunk texted her a blank text on the weekend while bored which started a conversation that lasted until the superbowl. I randomly ran into her when i was walking home yesterday with a buddy and had a small conversation. i find myself being the one to initiate conversation, is this an indicator that she is not interested? I decided to chill on texting her today, but im trying to find a way to meet up with her again and spark some interest with her.

Don, your feedbacks are invaluable. As far as a more sexual flirting, would you say it would have been the most appropriate to use this when I have created some major tension/attraction like when I had this girl laughing? Or even when I was creating some imagine in the girl's mind about that festival? I've always felt uncomfortable going for more sexual flirtation due to fear of doing it too early or doing in the wrong moment thus potentially creating a potentially ackward situation. However, I'm going to man up and go for it next time.

As far as that girl is concerned, I haven't texted her back since she replied back. Next time I see her, I will definitly play it cool. I think I am pretty good at the opening game, its middle to close that I struggle with.

Hey Don, just a quick overview.

Start texting HB7, ask her to hang out, says "she doesn't have time for those kind of shenanigans"

I call her a sexist, claim I don't affiliate with sexists (tease) this goes back and forth for a bit.

Next day she hits me up when I post a FB status saying Im going out, she wants to come but can't get ready in time.

I make fun of her for the next few convos about taking forever to get ready.

Later she claims she's "not sexist, just has her opinions on guys just like I have mine on girls"

I write back "I come from a female dominant household, so shed be surprised. Gnight (end of night convo)

She writes back "Well then surprise me, Goodnight"


Wtf does that mean at the end? Thanks Don!

[/b][/u]

Hi Don, I guess you were right about that I needed to build more attraction to her because when I asked her for a time to meet up she didn't respond. I don't get why she said she'd like to go out and then turn me down like that? Was she just being polite or is she demonstrating high value now? I don't think it's a good idea to get back to her again, that will look be too desperate in my opinion.

P.S. Today I saw her in the grocery store. I am pretty sure she saw me first but didn't say hi. Anyway, afterwards I was behind her at the till and pretended I didn't know it was her, I was looking somewhere else, then she turned saw me and immediately started fidgeting, dropping stuff, and pretended she was on the phone talking to someone. When it was time to pay and we got closer she "hung up" and we finally made eye contact. She smiled and said hi, then we started talking and she waited for me to checkout and we made our way out of the store together, we were talking the whole time just basic stuff about university and finally she said (in a casual way) "well, I'll see you somewhere in the lectures" I was on the verge to ask for her number and I know she would have given it but I didn't because she's so anxious. On the other hand she's really active in our conversations, and I still believe she's attracted to me. But she's so nervous I can't even take her out, so I have to wait to see her at uni again. I wouldn't say she's very shy though. I really start to like this girl a lot, but don't know how to comfort her in order to ask her out. I'll probably try chatting on FB more often..?

New here and to the game, just found this thread what do you think about this don?

So I was out last weekend and opened a set with 6 girls, the mistake I think I made is I didn't close... I got numbers for 3 girls throughout the night but the one I am really interested in has been playing hard to get, when I tried for her number she said find me on FB. lol

So here is our FB conversation this week...

ME: ApriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiL, I found you! Getting your number would have made things much easier.

HER:
lol

ME:
Lol is not your number!

HER:
I hate men right now Tony lol

ME:
I hate women right now too, we should talk about it more over dinner sometime.

ME:
You better not give me your number after I win this powerball! (powerball is our lottery lol)

HER: hell yea!! we get married lol

ME:
Good plan, lets talk about the divorce and custody of the kids over dinner?

HER: (just now)
you are very funny lol

What should I reply next??


Need help closing. We danced quite a bit and I should have been more on my game and closed that night but I made a rookie mistake and got a little too bubbly and I was all over talkign to a million girls. :/

Hey Don. Its me again... With yet another blonde. She seems into me more than the others. Met yesterday at club HB 7 talked about 2 hours (1 in the club 1 in my car) closed with lot of kissing/touching.

Today we texted. I wanted to make it light from the start:

Me: Hi, haven't you met extremely cool guy yesterday?
10 minutes
Her: Hi. Yes And we had very interesting conversation )
1 minutes
Me: It was a nice nigt I hope the studying is going fine today, do you know it all already?
Her: To be honest, I am just starting I will have a free flat so it will be fine, chill out
30 minutes
Her: Nevertheless, I didn't thank you for a lift.
5 minutes
Me: Yeah you did, there was a small kiss I am also just starting my projects. But I would rather open a wine and watch a film...
7 minutes
Her: Yeah I would also like that. But work needs to be done.

Now I didn't reply because it is obvious she needs to do the work (me also anyway).

I have 2 questions.
Is my strategy OK so far? My thinking is that because we had so much kino and kissing I would just be pushing it too much if I would start off with just too much CnF/flirting.

Level of bluntness I will flirt with her in next convos. I see that you are always saying one should flirt in almost blunt way. However, I have found out that more and more I am communicating somewhat indirectly, not mentioning my person, it seems to me less needy and it is framing of the narration as if it is a common truth, not just my own opinion. Instead of saying
1) "I like how you move your ass"
I would say
2)"... well, you can pull off pretty sexy moves with your ass when dancing..."

That concept. Do you think (1) more blunt+direct (and therefore better) than (2)?