I met a girl over the summer who was great! Met her online and had the first date a day later on the Friday night! Went well and on Saturday I woke up to a beautiful day and a text from her saying "what are you up to today"! I asked her to the beach as we both had no plans! It was another great date with lots of kino and kissing.

We texted a bit but were both busy until the weekend. The whole time I was not chasing her and I got the impression she was not used to this! I was basically trying to be non needy. She flaked on me on date number 3.... It was planed for the weekend! no idea if the excuse was valid or not but I thought I'd give her another chance!

I remained non needy and scheduled for the next weekend! This is now two weeks since our first weekend. I could tell that the time had reduced her initial excitement that I created! The date was set for Sat night and on Friday I said that I would contact her Sat afternoon with the plans!

3 o'clock on sat afternoon I text the plans and she responds "sorry I've already made plans for tonight. We can meet another time"! In my head I was like WTF!!! I texted saying that I thought we had plans set and she said that she made the plans because she thought i was going to text her earlier on sat with the plans!

I didn't get pissed but I said that two flakes in a row is just not me and I LJBF her immediately!

She seemed quite shocked at this response and said "if your looking for a girl to chase you then I'm not like that!"

I replied saying "I'm not looking for you to chase me but I don't like games! Two flakes hints something to me so I'm stepping back"




There was no contact until a few days ago when I got bored and pinged her a funny text! We have been getting fun and flirty again and after a string of shite dates with other girls recently I've been thinking about the dates I had with this girl! She was great fun!

I had a date with another girl lined up for tonight which was shit (no spark). The summer girl worked out I had been on a date and asked how it went! I told her straight up that there was no spark and the whole time I wished the other girl was her!

I think this girl likes to be chased by a guy but this is dangerous as being the chaser can make you look needy!

How should I proceed here? Should I chase her with a sexual element in order to not be AFC??

My gut instinct tells me to just gradually increase sexual talk! Chasing like an alpha perhaps.



Some background;
She is an alpha female (the dominant one in her group)
Will not chase guys
Wants to be chased

You need to turn the table back in your favor. Girls will chase the guys they want... Even this one. Go off the radar for a bit till she initiates contact... And never NEVER tell a chick that the date wasn't good and you wished it was her. I don't care if the woman cut your balls off half way through dinner. To a girl your interested in the date was wonderful and just what you needed.

Lets say you continue down this path your on and it actually works... it won't but lets say it does. She has you by the balls and you don't want that. She'll twist them anyway she wants and you'll follow. You need to be in control.

After you go dark for a bit and she texts you keep it short and simple. You've been working and going out. If she asks about other chicks you say you've been out with one a few times now. She's fun and you click well with her. Thats all you answer. She'll fight to get back into the lime light.

That's the problem! I went no contact for 6 months and that hardly worked! She is too stubborn to chase it seems! That's why I'm in new territory as I always get them to chase me.

What your suggesting won't work, I've tried it! If I did it again the same thing will happen! Im too stubborn to chase her and she is too stubborn to chase me.

She knows my life has got brilliant since she last met me. I've set up a successful company really close to her. Money is good cars are great, holidays plenty.

Since no contact won't work can someone give pointers on how to do a subtle chase without throwing away all the power? Anyone experience this shit? The challenge intrigues me!

.......... you took her out, did you even kiss her?, if not there is your problem, you go on a date girls want it to lead to something, not catatonic talking, they want to get laid at the end of the date, or at least kissed

First paragraph man...

what happened date 2?

Date 1, mini golf went well k closed a few times.

Date 2, the beach kissed throughout the date

ok, so if she has flaked 3 times, just only contact 1 time every 1-2 weeks, game other girls while waiting her out, let her come to you other then that, before 3 flakes, stay in contact, try to get her out until lucky number 3, don't overthink it she might just actually be busy, but the magic number is 3, 3 flakes withdraw and meet new girls while remaining in casual contact with her stop investing at that point, next once you can get her out on a day, give her some probable deniability turn her on as much as possible and try to fuck her