'Mushy' comments to your gf.



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PostPosted: Mon Jan 16, 2012 7:59 pm 
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Ok, the girl Im with now... she made the first moves, admitted she was attracted to me before I actually knew her/was into her back.


She compliments me quite often, and I played a pretty solid game and got her.


We've been going out properly for about 2 weeks, but dating for 2 months.


She's said she's never had such a compatible and faultless romance with someone as she has with me.


So now you get the picture...

What are the rules on 'mushy' comments'... I am equally into her now, she is a great gal. Sometimes I let shit slide and tell her I think she is beautiful etc.

I get replies like 'awww' 'cuuute'... to be honest I dont like these kind of responses - they sometimes make me think it might be ultimately giving her too much ground/make me not seem a challenge anymore.

So...is it too early to be saying things like this? I sometimes want to tell her what she means to me, that everything is great...that I miss her at times when shes not around.

What do other dudes play by in these situations?





On the other hand, sometimes I think I fucking complain about anything :lol:


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 16, 2012 8:12 pm 
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mii8aJklEOg

"YOU'RE SCHMOOPY" "NO YOU'RE SCHMOOPY!!"


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 16, 2012 8:37 pm 
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Just keep the following things in mind and you'll be ok:

(1) There's an Alpha way to say "I love you" and a Beta way. Beta's say I love you in self-effacing, clingy, and desperate ways. They may say

"I don't deserve you"
"I can't live without you"
"You could do so much better than me"
"I can't believe I have a girl like you"

All beta. All of these responses pedestalize the girl in question and marginalizes your own value relative to hers. She subconsciously rationalizes by assuming she can do better than you, and your godly aura erodes away.

Alpha ways to say I love you:

"You'll never know how much I love you"
"I love you too"
"I think I might love you"

Also keep in mind you should still use the L word INFREQUENTLY and DON'T be the one to say it first. Infrequently because as terrible as it is, over-use WILL desensitize your relationship to affection

(2) Keep a balance between attraction and rapport, but ALWAYS lean towards attraction. So for every 3 cocky or suave things you say, you might say 1 loving thing. I'm not saying you should be keeping count, but in general, aim towards attraction. Why? Because whoever cares LESS in a relationship has MORE power and this dynamic must always lean towards you to keep your relationship under wraps. Don't imbalance it too much towards you though, or you'll regret it. Damaging your girlfriend's self-esteem or turning her insecure ( far beyond the necessary sexual tension to maintain the relationship) isn't a good a feeling.

(3) Keep her in LIMBO. People always end up going towards one extreme or the other. Their girlfriend's either feel too accepted or too rejected. The key is to KEEP HER GUESSING, KEEP HER WONDERING.

We always want what we can't have... but only if that thing is WITHIN our reach. We detest things we are incapable of conceiving. So if your relationships lacks rapport and you're always acting cocky with your girlfriend, expect her to fall into the arms of a more charming man. And on the same note, if your relationship lacks too much attraction and you're always sharing mushy moments, expect her to get raw dogged by a man far more Alpha and laconic than you. LIMBO. Like inception.

(4) Always remember the purpose of affection in a relationship. Why do males show affection to females, on a fundamental biological level? It's a way of signalling commitment, a sign of grooming, of protection. It is NOT NOT NOT supposed to be a method to SUPPLICATE to them. It is NOT supposed to be a way for a man to COMPENSATE for shortcomings in other places. It is NOT supposed to be a way to "appease" your girlfriend. You show her affection because she's unsure that you like her... and so when you buy her flowers or say something mushy, she gets super happy. If she's feeling sick of it, taking it for granted, showing signs of resentment, shit testing you too often, it's purpose has been poisoned.

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My Blog: www.solvemygirlproblems.com


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