I'm not an expert at this by any means but let's try a little exercise:

You mention physical ramifications but no emotions associated with the blush and sweat. Can you relax and just write down a few words that would best describe your emotions as you go through these physical changes? How do you feel? What goes on in your mind? What do you 'tell yourself' as all of this is going on?

excatly what this guy described.
nervous, sweating. i am not sure what feeling it is.
but excatly what that guy described

Fine . . . so, "Nervous" is one emotion. Go ahead and write down a few more. It's not EXACTLY what ^this guy says. You are not him. Write down your own experiences.

Not wanting to think about the actual emotions is part of the process. It's natural to NOT want to think about negative emotions. This is also what keeps us from addressing our issues. Just write down everything that goes in your head when this situation rises. If we can't go further, no big deal, you'll end up exactly as you are now. On the other hand, if we can gain some clues for improvement, wouldn't this be a good thing? Give it a shot.

i would say shy?? i am always shy anyway, but i feel more shy when i talk to those people.
also, self-conscious, too self-conscious.

that's the two main emotion can think of.

I just noticed your quick reply and prior to reading it, I knew you skimmed the process. Look . . . "SHY" is what you feel all the time.

Fine . . . let's put "self conscious" in the bucket. What else? How do you feel? What goes on in your mind DURING these interactions? If you can't think of things on your own, why not look up a list of ALL EMOTIONS and just put your finger on the ones that seem to apply to your situation? Maybe wiki a "list of emotions" and write through it.

tension, i felt tension when those people talk to me, and when they actively hold ey-contact. i however would feel less/no tension if i am the one who do the eye contact actively
loniless/shame for some reason, especially when i am out alone and when those people come out
embarresment because of my look comparing to theirs??


one more, but i don't know the name of it, is when everyone's looking at u, and u flush.

I would write that attribute list of things that make you a cool or superior guy. You may want to add goals for things to make you even better. Maybe you can start dressing cooler and get good at a sport? And most of all practice game!

So reading the inner game stuff I mentioned here is a great start. I think others have suggested reading, its a long road in any case but the sooner you start the sooner you will get this handled.

i am working on it at the moment.
the first thing i am going to do is holding eye contact with random strangers and say hi.

the writing down a list of attributes is a very god idea. really thank you for that idea
also i am constantly dressing cooler SPAM, but it is still a bit out of my comfort zone, since i don't normally do it.

eye contact with everyone as a habit is a great idea! Sounds like you are on the right track

Go get your hair cut somewhere trendy. You'll almost certainly be cut by the sort of person who makes you get a red face. Have a couple of cool stories to tell which you know are cool (or borrow some dhv from here). You will look in the mirror when you talk to them too so it's almost like looking into a tv which makes it easier. Go back every 6 or so weeks to get a new cut and develop your conversation skills.

FWIW, I was in the same position until age 19. I initially solved it by getting pissed!

PS. I know book reading is easier than manning up and doing something real, but you should also consider a pua idea that 10% of what we do should be read, 90% real.

thank you for ur advice.
looks like i need a complete makeover

i don't understand what u meant by mirror though. do u mean like looking at them, imagining u are looking at a mirror??

what did u do to overcome that red face issue when u are 19 excatly? if u don't mind me asking. is it the change of thoughts or what?

Ha!

Quick tip; if you don't have a particular style that you know is fashionable, just ask the hairdresser to come up with something stylish that meets various criteria (won't get me kicked out of school/looks cool/etc). This is your first conversation topic with them.

When you get a hair cut, you will be facing a mirror and the person cutting will stand behind you. You won't look directly at them; you look at their reflection. I think this might make conversation slightly easier.

I've always been good at talking to strangers other than some AMOGs and girls I found attractive. You know the guy who is charming to the older lady, is memorable for all the right reasons to the older man, can keep pace with a bloke and is great with kids? I could do all of that, but the moment any girl approached, I could only handle it like that dude from Big Bang Theory.

Up until very nearly 19, I lived in a boys boarding house. I was continuously AMOGed. I was publicly tooled in front of every girl. Tooling me was made ever easier when I ended up doing the sort of thing you see in those comedies where someone does something majorly stupid and everyone laughs at him. I'm still affected by that last part 10 years later btw. All that I learnt socially from this time was to take HUGE amounts of abuse without showing any effect (/I'll have a major break down when it all comes to the surface).

What changed? I went to uni. I could start again. I lived with girls.

With hindsight, living with girls was key because I got to have them as friends. They invited me on nights out when the whole house went. All the AMOGs who wanted to get with any of these girls had to win the group over. Now, I was in the cool group. People had to pay respect to me as entry.

When they wanted to talk, I was happy to listen.

I won the blokes over too. Everyone started in that slightly shy position as no one knew anyone else.

I was at this stage able to talk to these girls like they were just other blokey friends. How hot they were didn't matter. One of my housemates was an underwear model. She played beach volleyball as a pro. Her girlfriend looked like Angelina Jolie. She behaved no differently towards me than the ugly friends.

They were now no longer on some plinth. I'd mock them. If they did something stupid, I would direct attention at them for doing it (if someone tells you something stupid they did, it's for attention).

You need to break your current routines to actually meet hot girls away from your usual haunts. If you're away from your usual places, no one will know you so you can re-invent yourself.

the real secret apple is beginning to see yourself as "high status". Your current innate reaction to "cool" people is that they are a source of judging, superiority , leading to discomfort. By hook or by crook, which is reading, practicing, learning, you have to change your self image. And, as you suspect, if you don't think of yourself as "high Status" you have no chance with desirable woman.

So did anybody in your past stare you down and make you feel uncomfortable verbally or otherwise? Did anybody ever corner you emotionally? Was anybody in your past careless enough with their choice of words to create higher tension as the interaction progressed?

i think it is mostly the higher status thing. i feel highly uncomfortable when i am stared by people who are cooler than me.
i don't think anyone have cornered me emotionally. I am just hsving this feeling for no reason.

i think i should work on the higher status thing. hypnotizing myself worked sometime, as i tried. it is mostly the belief i have at that moment which determines if i blush or not.