Okey, I'm pretty new to online date sites and today I created my first and very own profile-text. My goal was to create an interesting and fun text that will get me some positive attention. I appriciate any feedback, good or bad so I can change the text and get it as good as possible.
The text is written in my mother language (not english), but ill try to translate it and hopefully it wont ruin the points of it.
I'm unsure if its to big and to much info? Maybe I talk to much about myself so i become less interesting? Anyway, you guys know whats a kick-ass text is, so shoot me while you can. Heres the text fellas (The bolded text is by the dating site i use, I cannot changes that):
English is not my mother language and the text is proper written in my language at the datingsite. Focus on the points and not english grammer
Description of yourself
Hello, and welcome to my site. My name is Jack, I'm 24 years old and was born and raised in MYTOWN. I'm pretty new to this site and figured out that I should get myself a profile text - you dont go downtown without being dressing up?
You can do without this as your age and other details are already a part of your profile.
I know something about everything, but like to pretend to know alot more. Im a good winner, but I can rub into the opponent if its a bad loser. I'm not sure how ill handle a loss myself, and if i know myself ill probably never know...
Sounds convoluted to me; difficult to understand - lose this part.
I'm educated carpenter and have worked in daycare/kindergarden 3 years. I can both bend nails and wipe snot, but also cleaning up and comfort a little friend who is crying. I'm very happy with both and it has given me muc I'll bring further in life. This summer I started to study and it's a good feeling to knowing what I want to work with the rest of your life.
lol@"bend nails and wipe snot" it's a bit grotesque can you rephrase this into something while keeping the humour aspect? Also fix your spelling, it's a big turnoff if your spelling sucks ass.
As a person I am kind, positive and enjoy what life has to offer. I am honest, caring and god good humor, which punctuated with irony at times. I have no supe/secretr-power, but I can juggle and has a plan to take over the world someday. I'll need one by my side, maybe thats you?
No, you do have a superpower- attracting women and you're good at it! Make up some super power and OWN IT! I'd flesh out this playful aspect of yuour profile a bit more.
I'll stop here, so we can have something to talk about aswell
Description of his dream partner
It is difficult to describe someone I have not met, but I can try. There must be a girl who knows herself and knows what she wants in life. Someone who is positive and look at every day as an opportunity. She must be social, kind and caring. One who is concerned about her look, but also able to watch out of the window without any makeup. I think humor is important and perhaps we will become best buddies?
So, what is it you don't want? SHould have a few disqualifiers in here so you don't look like a sap who'll fall for anyone and everyone.
Description of his work and interests
As I wrote above, I have just begun to study. Beside that I am quite normal. Time is filled with fitness, family and friends. My training is basicly running and strength training. The amount varies, ranging from 4 days a week to support-member in small periods.
I have many good friends that I appreciate and spend alot of time with. In summer there is often sand beach volley, swimming and barbecues. We often takes trips , whether its to another country or here with a camping trip by the sea or mountains. Or just a night downtown.
This was a lot of text and if you read everything there is definitely a plus in the margin! To show it, you can write about a property you have, which means that I should take you on a plan to take over the world:)
CHAT
