How to proceed with this



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 Post subject: How to proceed with this
PostPosted: Mon Dec 19, 2011 1:56 am 
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First post here appreciate the feedback. Im 30 been dating this 28 year old hb7 for the past 4 months and things are generally good. We get along great friends and family like us I used pua techniques to escalate things. She has the usual chick stuff insecure anxiety etc. There are two issues that I have 1st is that over the past 4 months she has split up with me 3 times after a social event where I did not introduce her as my girlfriend. Not really a huge deal I just dealt with her passive aggressive behavior and didn't define what we are. The 2nd is the constant tests. I realize most women shit test men at some point but this happens on a daily basis and while I acknowledge and pass all the tests im getting completely tired of them...I don't show that im tired of them but I am. I will put it this way if I don't/can't see her for 3 days I get shit for it. My problem is that while I don't want to end things with her cause she really is an amazing women im just not sure if these tests will ever end and I can't spend the rest of my life doing this. How should I proceed here cause I either call her out on the bs or I just let this one go.


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PostPosted: Mon Dec 19, 2011 2:37 am 
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you should probably post some examples. like what do you mean exactly when you say she "gives you shit"? this is important because guys on this forum tend to be paranoid and constantly look for and see shit tests where there arent any. thats what im most curious about. it could be just that she legit wants you to spend more time with her and not be a shit test at all.

its interesting that you describe her as 'amazing' even though she seems to be doing a lot of things that annoy the shit out of you. what do you find amazing about her? because any girl that i would describe as amazing probably wouldnt dump me every month and give me shit all the time. just sayin...

ultimately you need to decide whether you want that kinda drama in your life or not. thats what its gonna eventually come down to. obviously for a really cool girl youre attracted to and love spending time with, youll put up with some amount of drama. only you know where the tradeoff is for you.


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PostPosted: Mon Dec 19, 2011 2:46 am 
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Quote:
.....There are two issues that I have 1st is that over the past 4 months she has split up with me 3 times ....The 2nd is the constant tests. .....I just let this one go.
Dont you see the red flags in your relationship - She brokeoff with you 3 times. Even if a girl has disagreements with her boyfriend they would fight or even argue but wouldnt breakoff a relation they value. What are you waiting for, her to break a chair on you someday? She broke off with you three times, seems to have high insecurities and trust issues. Is this the best that you can do?


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PostPosted: Mon Dec 19, 2011 2:53 am 
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Quote:
First post here appreciate the feedback. Im 30 been dating this 28 year old hb7 for the past 4 months and things are generally good. We get along great friends and family like us I used pua techniques to escalate things. She has the usual chick stuff insecure anxiety etc. There are two issues that I have 1st is that over the past 4 months she has split up with me 3 times after a social event where I did not introduce her as my girlfriend. Not really a huge deal I just dealt with her passive aggressive behavior and didn't define what we are. The 2nd is the constant tests. I realize most women shit test men at some point but this happens on a daily basis and while I acknowledge and pass all the tests im getting completely tired of them...I don't show that im tired of them but I am. I will put it this way if I don't/can't see her for 3 days I get shit for it. My problem is that while I don't want to end things with her cause she really is an amazing women im just not sure if these tests will ever end and
Quote:
How should I proceed here cause I either call her out on the bs or I just let this one go.
Quote:
I can't spend the rest of my life doing this.
heh. you just answered your question.

So tell her. call her out on the bs.

This is your life man. Youre not happy. So how do you deal with problems in your life? Put up with them with your head down and your tail in between your legs? Or voice them, let her know youre the type of man who doesnt put up with bullshit.

If you've already split 3 times in 4 months I dont see it going far. But at least stand up for yourself while youre in it. Who knows doing this might be the turning point and shit will get better from here on out.

The problem I think is your mindset. Do you really think this girl is the one you'll marry? I think you could do better, but youre stuck in a scarcity mindset so you'll take whatever you can get for the time being, even if you can't spend the rest of your life doing this

What if you started to realise you could be meeting hundreds of women and taking your pick from the best of the lot... The only thing thats holding you back is you...

I dont think you would still be with this girl. Anyway. In the meantime...

voice your problems to her, take a stand, and realise that you can walk away from something if its not making you happy.

OR

Remain the man who never really amounted to much, because he always put up with bullshit and settled for less.


I know what I'd choose. But its your decision, your life. not mine.

_________________
I'ma be what I set out to be, without a doubt undoubtedly, and all those who look down on me I'm tearin down your balcony, no if ands or buts, don't try to ask him why or how can he


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PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2011 4:58 am 
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Excellent advice no need for examples cause it doesn't really matter at this point. Just 2 things of course there are red flags and I def call her out on her bullshit. Its not really a scarcity mindset and she knows that I guess I just decided to put in a little extra effort with this one to make things work. So that said end it now or wait until after the holidays? And I really do appreciate the insight.


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PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2011 6:50 am 
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Quote:
Excellent advice no need for examples cause it doesn't really matter at this point. Just 2 things of course there are red flags and I def call her out on her bullshit. Its not really a scarcity mindset and she knows that I guess I just decided to put in a little extra effort with this one to make things work. So that said end it now or wait until after the holidays? And I really do appreciate the insight.
why are you still asking us.

You want to just keep her around for a little bit longer so you can put your dick in her vagina a few more times? or do you love her and want to try make it work out for the long run?

The truth is if youre considering this after a few months... Shes either not the right girl for you, or you have the totally the wrong mindset to be in a relationship with... A few hiccups then youre outta there.

On this site youre gonna get a lot of horny, 17 year old, half virgins opinions: "dump her man Go fuck ten other women!!"

But youre 30. where do you want to take your life? you decide this.

_________________
I'ma be what I set out to be, without a doubt undoubtedly, and all those who look down on me I'm tearin down your balcony, no if ands or buts, don't try to ask him why or how can he


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PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2011 9:00 pm 
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I'll take one last stab at this -

Most service companies end up spending 80% of their time/resources on 20% of their clients, which may are not even be their most profitable clients. These clients are just High Maintenance and extremely time consuming. In times of recession or 'budgeting' companies end up firing those clients. And guess what their revenue and return on investment infact goes up.


Unless you are wanting to understand needy, insecure women as a text or lesson in physiology then continue to work on this relation. Nothing wrong with that - I think most PUAs do this when they are starting off but for different reasons.


But, if you want to enjoy your time and life with like minded girls then cut your loses early and move on. There are a lot of fun people out there !


Emotionally healthy women who are out there to date and have fun do the same to guys all the time - they wouldn't put up with shit.


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PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2011 10:51 pm 
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So that said end it now or wait until after the holidays? And I really do appreciate the insight.
After the Holidays


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PostPosted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 12:50 am 
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Quote:
So that said end it now or wait until after the holidays? And I really do appreciate the insight.
After the Holidays
I ended it this evening just wouldn't have been right dragging it through the holidays.


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