Ezo and dicklow, i completely understand. Even though i seemed like one, I wasnt trying to be an ass. Here is an edited version that may help resolve those issues.

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PUA is all about having BALLS

DO YOU HAVE BALLS?

I GOT BIG BALLS

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7YUuyzQDmjY[/youtube]

the best puas have BIG, JUICY, BOUNCING BALLS that are getting sucked by HOT FUCKING BABES.

Be a man.

No excuses.

No complaints.

Stop being a pussy.

If you cant do this, you dont have balls.

Go sarge.

Be the rockstar that you always dreamt about it.

Make that dream a reality.

===================================================================

So How do you get bigger balls?

balls = cajones = manliness = willpower

These mean - to man up / to suck it up and do whatever the task is in front of you without complaints, excuses or pussying out

we need balls, cajones, manliness and/or willpower to approach women.

Rejection is what we fear.

how do you get over a fear?

Face your fear, you need to man up and do it.

tactics to face fear
- ignoring fear
- numbing ourselves
- manning the fuck up

if you ignore the fear, you still have the fear.

If you numb yourself to your fear, ie - alcohol, drugs, etc, you still have the fear

If you MAN UP, you can face your fear and destroy it

“I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain.”
- Frank Herbert

If you man up and face your fear, only you and your confidence will remain. the fear will have disappeared.

the fear of approaching will disappear only after you approach countless women
the fear of rejection will disappear after you get rejected by a plethora of women
the fear of sex and your performance will disappear after you fuck many women ad practice techniques

fear of anything will disappear if you tackle it head on.

The best PUAs have overcome their fears. They now have BIG BALLS and can do whatever the fuck they want.

PUAs should advocate having big balls because then no one would have fears about approaching, escalating, asking for numbers or day 2s or really anything.

Having big balls then would increase the amount that you approach, escalate, etc so that, in the end, by having big balls, you learn much faster than without having big balls.

===========================================================================================

SO, DO YOU HAVE THE BALLS TO DO IT?


Yoda: No. Try not. Do... or do not. There is no try.



man up, just do it


- J Slay -

_________________
Slayin ladies all around the world

You miss 100% of the shots you never take.
- Wayne Gretzky

Wonderful man!

_________________
I'm not trying to be a dick Ezo, but you're being a Pick Up Snob in my opinion.

bbardot: you just reminded me about porn

That's a pretty good 'how to'

Well, all these posts fall on the same thing. As the quote says: just do it.

There are people who are ready to hear that and are ready to "just do it" and then there are people who are not ready yet. They lack the strength or the tools to man up or just do it.

How do you breathe underwater? Just use your gills. But I dont have gills. Well, then just get some gills.

You see the point, even though the OP is right, balls goes a long way. In order to get the message out to people, you gotta break it down in easy steps that are easy to understand, easy to follow and not too intimidating. Otherwise, people wont do it.

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I'm not trying to be a dick Ezo, but you're being a Pick Up Snob in my opinion.

bbardot: you just reminded me about porn

Ezo i agree with you man

but i think where we differ is similar to this analogy:

If someone is afraid of the water, how will they ever learn how to swim?

The only way for them to learn how to swim is to get in the water.

In the same way:

If someone is afraid of women, how will they ever have sex or get into a relationship?

the only way for them to learn how to have sex or have a gf is to talk with women, escalate,etc

The real question is how do you get from point A to point B? afraid of water to swimming? afraid of women to a pua?

There are a few ways:
- someone forces you
- it forces you
- you man up and just do it

Relative to water:
- someone can push you into the pool.
- water can come get you lol
- you man up and just jump in the fuckin pool, stand in the baby section, hire a swim instructor, etc

Relative to women:
- someone can force you to talk to women
- women can come talk to you (unlikely)
- you man up and go open women, escalate, etc

Obviously force and situation (the first two ways) are not as good for personal development compared to the third option which is personal choice.

How do you can you grow a pair of balls to make that choice?

EZO, here is what really alot of people struggle with. WHY, why me? and dont act on it... finally they get so sick of it they do something about it. Thats the number one reason guys are on this site, they were fed up with their sex lives and realized they needed improvement.

Its a mentality that a person has, when they are fed up or realize they have nothing to lose by trying something new.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JuFvx7vN_pU[/youtube]

I could make, and i should make, a post about my favorite book and movie of all time.

Once you realize that "This is your life and it's ending one minute at a time." you will get your ass up and do something about it.

to be something more than just apart of the mass culture and your old afraid self "We are all part of the same compost heap."

you are jealous of others and yet dont do anything about it.
"All the ways you wish you could be, that's me. I look like you wanna look, I fuck like you wanna fuck, I am smart, capable, and most importantly, I am free in all the ways that you are not."

Once we realize this, that we are a worthless pile of shit, and "only after we've lost [all our inhibitions] that we're free to do anything."

"On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero." so get the fuck up and do something before its your turn to keel over and die

Thats why we have to say fuck it, sarge and sarge and sarge. Just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swimming. "I ran. I ran until my muscles burned and my veins pumped battery acid. Then I ran some more." Until we finally get what we are ultimately seeking.

"Without pain, without sacrifice, we would have nothing. Like the first monkey shot into space." Facing your fears will be uncomfortable and awkward, but afterwards you will have conquered your fear and it will be no more

We need to recognize that this is how life works. "And then, something happened. I let go. Lost in oblivion. Dark and silent and complete. I found freedom. Losing all hope was freedom." do not hope that everything will be alright, do something to make everything turn out alright

"I'll bring us through this. As always. I'll carry you - kicking and screaming - and in the end you'll thank me." The only way to get through it is if you do it yourself, you have the willpower and the balls to do it. Thats why he couldnt let tyler do it, he finally grew a pair of balls.

"Every evening I died, and every evening I was born again, resurrected." You must die inside, realize that the old you is not worth it, before you can be reborn.

grow a pair, just do it. open up your eyes to the fact that you are in despair, losing it, not getting any pussy, a 40 year old virgin, etc

"My eyes are open." so that when you are ready to make that transformation, you can pull that trigger too

===============================================================================================

People say grow a pair because it means to forsake one's inhibitions that were holding them back from accomplishing something great.

Until people realize that they are a piece of shit, or a loser, or a nerd, or a dweeb, or whatever, they wont do anything about it.

To tell them to man up, is to forgo that revelation process to speed up the pua learning curve. But if they do realize that they have nothing to lose is when they start to grow their biggest balls ever by themselves without our prodding.

until that time however, i will keep telling them to man up and grow a pair because they havent had that revelation yet. BUt really they shouldnt experience that relevation because it is a terrible yet awesome moment in ones life when you have hit rock bottom. Thats why its rock bottom.

Ezo, in this way, i cant really explain how to "man up" or how to learn what it is, but i think each and every person knows atleast a little bit about what i am saying here.

There is no way to break down this mentality into small steps that are easy to follow. You either "get it" or you dont.

In the movie, the scene when he gets his chemical burn, he finally "gets" it. Until that moment in your life, you cannot have the willpower to do anything and everything.

"Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we've been waiting for. We are the change that we seek." - obama

Barack is right, you cannot wait for fate, destiny or your mother to do your dirty laundry.

Look deep down inside of you and find the willpower to do whatever you fear the most, and then do whatever you fear the most and conquer that fear. That is what just do it and to man up and all those other phrases we all know so well mean.

We have to tell them to man up time and again. They recognize the basics of what it means but they do not have a true understanding of it yet. After countless times of "manning up" and just doing it, they will have a better comprehension of what we are all talking about. Eventually, they will have big balls and in good shape. no need to learn how to man up anymore, only after practicing just doing it continuously they realize what it means.

To have balls is to conquer your fear despite your fear. There is no way to really teach that.

J Slay

_________________
Slayin ladies all around the world

You miss 100% of the shots you never take.
- Wayne Gretzky

That was a post of the kind I like Jslay, it had a lot of good thoughts in it.

I still think that you are missing one way people can learn to swim. If you dont push them in that is. You can spend the whole day to tell them to man up and they wont listen. You can tell them that if they dont just jump in, they will never learn to swim, they will say, ok so Ill just buy a boat.

There will always be a way around manning up or doing anything that requires a bit more effort or even pain.

The thing is that people need to see the need to man up they need to see that it will be worth it andd it cannot be too intimidating.

The way you are reasoning has only one flaw, the excuses are endless. If you tell people to go out in field and they dont dare you tell them to just do it. Then you tell them to man up and that is too hard too, so you tell them to work their inner game which is too hard too. So you tell them to do some mental exercises, which will also be too hard, etc etc until they are ready to give up because to road they have to take consists of stuff they dont dare to face.

The best way to teach people to man up is to show them the benefits it will give them, and tell them that they can do it. Dont tell people that it is "just do it" that means that if they dont dare, they are scum. Nobody gets motivated by telling them that the thing they think is difficult is easy.
So basically the people who wants to learn have to make a choice.

I wrote some posts on this a while ago, about how to rewire your brain from believing that your crappy life is comfy to beileving that you really would be better off changing stuff, difficult stuff.

fail-to-win-suck-your-way-to-greatness- ... highlight=

getting-rid-of-aa-its-a-choice-in-or-ou ... highlight=

you-can-afford-pride-vt67487.html?highlight=



But above all this post deals with exactly what we are talking about. This is how you get started facing your fears.
facing-fears-getting-started-vt79129.html?highlight=

Hope this helps

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I'm not trying to be a dick Ezo, but you're being a Pick Up Snob in my opinion.

bbardot: you just reminded me about porn

i read those posts and they were great ezo. really what i was trying to express you summed up in your 4 posts
The difference between your posts and mine can be broken down to this: you are coming from a more positive outlook than i am.

we are basically saying the same message except that i state: that people realize their problems and then want to tackle them - but they tackle their problems in spite of their current condition, rather than, for the future condition.

I admit yours is better because it is positive. However, alot of people who are in that current state never truly get that epiphany that you described
Some people never have that epiphany in their entire lives. Never a turning point, just a slow climb up step by step.

These people start out without any pillars still erect, a broken sledgehammer and a weak heart.

Unfortunately, according to people on the forum, alot of people who turn to pua are already in this condition.

In this way, i guess both your approach and my approach is effective for getting, albeit different, people to realize that being better with women is worth it and that their current state of being is shit.

you: being better with women
me: improve current condition

now this being said, i do think that for most people that your approach is more effective since it correlates with positive emotions from the start.

BUT

if you do hit rock bottom, without any pillars remaining, you will be in a miserable place. Eventually you will either succumb to your misery or have a different kind of epiphany. "And then, something happened. I let go. Lost in oblivion. Dark and silent and complete. I found freedom. Losing all hope was freedom." From this epiphany, you come out with a new mentality that you can do anything, everything, that you dont give a shit about other peoples opinions because you now realize that only you can actually do anything about your situation, that you have nothing to lose by trying. From this moment of revelation, you will put your whole effort in whatever you truly want to succeed in, because you have already been to hell and back, you have nothing left to lose. "If you want to succeed as much as you want to breath, then you will succeed" In this way, you have made the choice to reject your old persona and go on a journey in search of a new one.

you even been there supposedly
But It seems like you got to rock bottom purposely and that is ok, and even a good tactic because you recognize your faults before you hit the bottom and know what to improve on. Thats the first epiphany in that you now know that you arent perfect. But You still struggle, and have a second epiphany because of the rock bottom status, but it is not as powerful, as already being at rock bottom when you get your first epiphany. But yours is still very powerful for the people who arent at that stage yet. Your message can probably can help more people than mine can but both are valid.

^ now this is not really about "just do it" really. I recommend "just do it" to avoid getting to that point, at the bottom. Ive been to the real bottom, the bottom where i did not remove any pillars but had none left, i was suffocating under a collapsed roof. i know what it is like. It is not pretty or fun. Saying that, i would suggest your method for most newbs, but some need my perspective because no matter how much you prod them, they wont recognize that the potential is worth the effort until they get that rock bottom epiphany.



This your fear argument summarized with the best quotes (go ahead and copy and paste it )

Got one more paper and then my finals week at university is finished!

Cheers!

J Slay

_________________
Slayin ladies all around the world

You miss 100% of the shots you never take.
- Wayne Gretzky

Sorry to interrupt but if it was true that "the more you workout the bigger you would get" don’t you think if everyone worked out they would all be Hench.
Getting muscular is mostly about knowing what to do (because people have different body type i.e endo, meso or endo , what works for one body type doesn’t work for another) and consistency.

A fat person (endo) needs to reduce calorie intake, burn more calories by doing endurance weight training consisting of many reps and sets and because his body generates fat and muscle at a fast rate means he heals faster too (muscle fibre needs to repair after workout).

Skinny person (ecto) needs to increase his caloric intake, cut out all endurance/cardio, lift heavy weight where he can do max of 8x3 of 4 compound exercises which only targets 2 big muscles (i.e. chest & legs) and then change it the next time he works out. The ecto need more rest because he generates less muscle and fat hence heals slower (72hrs), workouts should be no more than 45mins.

Similarly PUA is about knowing what to do and consistency, I can have big balls and go up to a group of girls and still get rejected because I conveyed too much interest which Is a DLV, however I can have big balls open an adjacent set with an opener, DHV to the obstacles, neg the target disarming the obstacles bla bla bla...etc read MM

I fail to see how this fits into the discussion in this thread.

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I'm not trying to be a dick Ezo, but you're being a Pick Up Snob in my opinion.

bbardot: you just reminded me about porn

Post removed for violation of forum rules. - Mod