Dating a coworker, what to do?



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PostPosted: Thu Dec 08, 2011 11:46 am 
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Joined: Tue Dec 06, 2011 4:17 pm
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Heya!


I have a little bit of a problem with a chick I work with. I really like her and I think she likes me, at least she did before..

We've been working together for like maybe one year. And he has given me alot of IOI's .. but I don't think I've been so good at "accepting" them, taking advantage or whatever..
Like many times she pinched my bum, pushed me away (playfully) and things like that.

Like if I talk to her, she will stand very close to me, when I show her something she stands so close that we have alot of body contact and stuff.. but we have never done anything else besides work.. only like last weekend when we had a christmas party for the job then she and one other guy came to my place and had a few drinks before we went out. She was OVERLY impressed with my appartment 8)
She was like: OH MY GOD, you have a pool table in the livingroom, OH WE GOTTA PLAY!
I told her that sadly both the cues were broken, so we couldn't play.
She said: ait, another time then..

Many times I feel that she says things that want her to do stuff with me in the future, but suddenly it looks like she's breaking all the flirting.. Like for example the other day she was talking about a jobcourse she has to take online, but she can't wrap her head around it and she needed help with it. So I thought: Ait, good reason to do something together, so I asked if she wanted to go to my or her place so I could help her with it. And she litterly just didn't answer.. I don't know

We don't have a really close relationship, like we don't talk so much about personal things.. I also feel she maybe gets a little bored talking to me..

I also think she is maaaybe starting to going out with another dude.

So how should I procceed? Keep flirting and ecalating? Qualify her so she starts investing in me and not that other guy?
I need to at least hook up with her, she's like a HB8


Wow, this became longer than I thought, but I appriciate all the help I can get, I'm a bit new to pickup


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PostPosted: Thu Dec 08, 2011 6:51 pm 
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Joined: Sat Jul 02, 2011 4:37 am
Posts: 3276
Quote:
Heya!


I have a little bit of a problem with a chick I work with. I really like her and I think she likes me, at least she did before..

We've been working together for like maybe one year. And he has given me alot of IOI's .. but I don't think I've been so good at "accepting" them, taking advantage or whatever..
Like many times she pinched my bum, pushed me away (playfully) and things like that.

Like if I talk to her, she will stand very close to me, when I show her something she stands so close that we have alot of body contact and stuff.. but we have never done anything else besides work.. only like last weekend when we had a christmas party for the job then she and one other guy came to my place and had a few drinks before we went out. She was OVERLY impressed with my appartment 8)
She was like: OH MY GOD, you have a pool table in the livingroom, OH WE GOTTA PLAY!
I told her that sadly both the cues were broken, so we couldn't play.
She said: ait, another time then..

Many times I feel that she says things that want her to do stuff with me in the future, but suddenly it looks like she's breaking all the flirting.. Like for example the other day she was talking about a jobcourse she has to take online, but she can't wrap her head around it and she needed help with it. So I thought: Ait, good reason to do something together, so I asked if she wanted to go to my or her place so I could help her with it. And she litterly just didn't answer.. I don't know

We don't have a really close relationship, like we don't talk so much about personal things.. I also feel she maybe gets a little bored talking to me..

I also think she is maaaybe starting to going out with another dude.

So how should I procceed? Keep flirting and ecalating? Qualify her so she starts investing in me and not that other guy?
I need to at least hook up with her, she's like a HB8


Wow, this became longer than I thought, but I appriciate all the help I can get, I'm a bit new to pickup
hey man, here are some ideas for you, it would seem you are in a bad spot, you seemingly have little options and don't try to capitalize on the ones you do have, you should start going out at least 4 times a week and trying to increase your options, pickup is mostly a numbers game, you need an abundance of women not a scarcity, if you have no options you will become needy, and find yourself thinking from the point of view of a guy with no options, this will start turning the girls off that you do pursue, they will be able to sense it due to the way you are acting, it will just always shine through, you can either learn to pretend to not need her, pretend you have other options (to dhv), pretend other guys value you and seek your leadership, pretend you look out for your friends, or... you can actually start becoming this it is much easier to be higher value when you are higher value, then to ''fake it until you make it''


as for your current situation compliance test her (escalate) up to sex if she hits a compliance threshold, just run back down the ladder bit and build some compliance at a lower investment point then try to escalate again,

simplified once again, invite that girl out, forget about other guys, get her out alone (this is important, make sure you clarify you want to be alone if she tries to bring friends remember you lead not her), once she is alone be touchy and fun, get a kiss from her, after the kiss make your goal to turn her on, once you have attempted to reach that goal, make an excuse for why you have to get to your house, try to make out with her right away when at your house and get her naked/your finger inside her, and I'm sure you can take it from there



also if you don't understand compliance chiefs-guide-to-outer-game-vt75887.html here is a link with a brief description of a compliance ladder, if she flakes or things start going south, don't get ''needy'' i need this, i must have this, how can i make this work, go get new girls, show some intent to the girl you think you need, then drop off the face of the earth from her for a while, if she likes you she will come chase after you, if not, oh well chance came and went, maybe next time, there are tons of girls out there just as hot and more awesome


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