I don’t know why but lately(a year or so) I’ve not really been myself. I’ll meet a girl at a party or a bar or whatever we’ll hit it off but then I’ll just start being really mean and douchey, if not the first time we meet then the second. I always feel this animosity and anger towards good looking girls that it’s preventing me from ever being close to anyone that I think is attractive. This past year I’ve only slept with girls who I wouldn’t even add to facebook because I don’t want my friends finding out how not good looking these girls that I’m hooking up with.


I just reread what I wrote and truthfully I think I have deep self doubt/confidence issues. I’m scared to get close to anyone who I might really like. I think it’s because my last real girl friend broke up with me who I thought was extremely good looking. Now I’m scared of good looking girls, when I act douchey towards them in my mind I’m thinking that I’m getting back at the girl who left me but in reality I’m only hurting myself. I’m not really sure what I need to do about this. Does anyone have some advice? Should I see a shrink about this? Has anyone here benefited from going to a shrink with similar issues?

It's all about finding a happy medium with all things like that. In a way, you can channel that mean-ness into something good by using it to tease and neg. Just make sure you don't go overboard.

The fact that you are recognizing that you're being an asshole is a good thing. Think about specific scenarios you were in where you acted like a complete dick, and think of how you could have handled it more appropriately - more attractively. And try to think before you speak. After awhile, you won't have to put so much focus on it and it will become natural to handle these situations properly.

are you looking for a wife?

if not, then you don't need to trust her with the keys to your heart.

just have fun together and enjoy the company.

don't take steps to progress the relationship unless she wants to.

and only do so under careful consideration even then.

you can only be hurt if you put yourself in that position.

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

if you've turned into a douche then fix yourself up and become the good douche ! no girl wants a guy that actually disrespects them !

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Do you ASK for a girl's number when you go out ? If you answered yes...then you still need to practice your game