Im a thinker not a doer



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 Post subject: Im a thinker not a doer
PostPosted: Wed Nov 16, 2011 6:37 pm 
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Basically I've been reading PUA for like the past 4 months non-stop. I've been reading many forums, watching videos, and reading books. I look at all this stuff and play situations in my head but I never carry through with it. The most gaming I've done is talk to this girl who has a bf who I think lost interest mid way through.

I find it very difficult to actually go out and do all these things, I'm not sure why. Anyone experience this and could help a fellow AFC out?


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 16, 2011 6:42 pm 
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Force yourself certain goals. Say you may not go home until you've opened for example five women.


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 16, 2011 7:23 pm 
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you just have to have some type of strong will.. You have to have a passion to improve and become great. Some people just don't have that.. You could be one of them.

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PostPosted: Wed Nov 16, 2011 7:36 pm 
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Many people have this problem... But it is possible to overcome it. First of all you gotta realize that it isnt the end of the world if your first experience doesnt meet your expectations. It is just training, nothing that can affect your confidence or anything. You are starting from zero so if you would make a successful pickup in your first weeks that would be nothing short of a miracle. I myself have spent countless hours training and sarging just to calibrate my game.

Second... I know it is scary and difficult to get out there and do it for real. It hurts and it will suck before you get it right...

But consider this, what is worse, to have a few humiliating in field sessions or to have the humiliation of not being able to pick up a girl for the rest of your life?

Consider this quote:
"Yeah, I stayed. I stayed because everytime you threw a brick at my head or said I smelled; it hurt, but it could never hurt more than everyday of my life just being me."
- Kung-Fu Panda

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PostPosted: Wed Nov 16, 2011 7:52 pm 
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Quote:
Basically I've been reading PUA for like the past 4 months non-stop. I've been reading many forums, watching videos, and reading books. I look at all this stuff and play situations in my head but I never carry through with it. The most gaming I've done is talk to this girl who has a bf who I think lost interest mid way through.

I find it very difficult to actually go out and do all these things, I'm not sure why. Anyone experience this and could help a fellow AFC out?
Are you generally this way with other things in your life or are you a non-doer only with PU?

By the way, all your research + imagining is a good thing. You have motivation. It probably also means you have some organization skills. This pretty much sets you well above 90% of all members of this forum.


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 16, 2011 8:26 pm 
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Like me it sounds like you lean heavily on the introverted side. For introverts PUA is going to be extremely difficult as we tend to like to think things through for long periods before taking action. I've done the same as you - read up on PUA like crazy for months but have yet to impliment it. Just start by getting a good haircut and nice clothes that suit you. Working out wouldn't hurt either. Those things alone have gotten me a lot more opportunities with women this year (many of which didn't go anywhere because of my reluctance to make the first move).

Eventually though you HAVE to learn how to get out of your comfort zone and make the first move. I can't tell you how many opportunities have gone by the boards for me because I was reluctant to make the first move. There have been times when I've had women sending ridiculously obvious IOIs but I didn't act which always results in a loss.

In short- PUA is often about taking immediate action. Introverts like to wait and think things through. It's a difficult match but hopefully barriers can be broken.


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 17, 2011 6:47 am 
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Thanks for all the replies, really makes me feel like I need to get out there and take the first step.

I am pretty introverted when it comes to women. However, I'm in a fraternity where I'm constantly in social interactions. I've practiced other stuff like over the summer I went to the field everyday to practice my soccer shot. So this barrier really only relates to PUA. However, I would say I'm not particularily strong willed or goal oriented really.

I think the best plan of action right now is to make weekly goals.


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 17, 2011 3:21 pm 
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Quote:
Thanks for all the replies, really makes me feel like I need to get out there and take the first step.

I am pretty introverted when it comes to women. However, I'm in a fraternity where I'm constantly in social interactions. I've practiced other stuff like over the summer I went to the field everyday to practice my soccer shot. So this barrier really only relates to PUA. However, I would say I'm not particularily strong willed or goal oriented really.

I think the best plan of action right now is to make weekly goals.
You already seem to know your goals. Write them down.

More importantly, schedule the DAILY TASKS that are necessary to achieve those goals into a calendar. PU isn't like a space shuttle launch where you blast off with one press of a button or it's nothing. PU is more like working a jigsaw puzzle. You don't work and finish it all in one day. You simply put some time into it on a regular basis. One some days, you'll get lots of pieces done. On other days, you won't get any pieces done. Regardless, as long as you put time into it, you will be better organized after each session.

Stick around this forum long enough and you will read plenty of advice from various people to get into some sort of "frame". They'll urge you to get into some alternate reality from your current state. This is simply ridiculous. You're not training yourself to kill terrorists. All you're looking to do is enjoy a chat with another human being. Quiet, introverted, reserved people can do this just as well as the loud and boisterous.

I believe Chief wrote a post "newbie challenge" way back. Read that and think about it. Start interweaving this simple task into the fabric of your life. It wasn't too long ago in America when EVERYBODY used to greet EVERYBODY else. Strangers used to say hello to each other all the time. Start saying hello to everybody and you'll find it difficult to not be engaged in conversation. Don't limit this to your social circle within some fraternity in some little school. You do this everywhere . . . laundry mat, bagel shop, dmv, grocery store, etc . . . Make this a habit; it's a good one. And like all habits, you'll will begin to do all of this before you even realized that you did.


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