| Getting over an ex-girlfriend SUCKS. Especially one that you loved. It could be one of the hardest things in the world.
But there are a few things to get through the pain and to become happier then you have. I have done it a few times and I know when the break up first happens it can feel like the end of the world. Just remember it’s not and follow the steps below and before you know it you will be back on your feet.
1. Accept that the relationship is over. Whether you broke up with her or she broke up with you, it’s time to realize that it is over. Stop trying to come up with ways to make it work out. Odds are the break up is for a valid reason and it is time to move on.
2. Make a list of all the reasons you are not right for each other and why it would never work out in the long run anyway. Then make another list of the awesome things you are now able to do that you couldn't before with a girlfriend. Like have 3 ways, hit on every girl that walks, go on crazy spring break trips with your friends, don't have to compromise on stupid things, all the time you will have to do thing you like, the list goes on and on.
3. Exercise - a lot. When a break up happens, there are a lot of emotions involved. This is a great time to put those emotions to good use. Get in better shape, burn off that stress, build more energy, sleep better, be healthier, and get an accomplished attitude.
4. You can't change the past. Everything in the past cannot be changed. Accept that it happened and don't beat yourself up over it. You did what you thought was right at the time. There was/is no possible way to know the future. Look at it like this – You are here right now. Figure out where you want to be. Then make a plan to get to where you want to be in the future.
5. Stop looking at them. It’s time to get rid of all the pictures and all the objects that make you think of your ex. If there are items of value, sell them. By holding on to pictures and objects, you are sub consciously holding on to her. By getting rid of it all you are ready to move on and find someone new. Hide their posts on Facebook and STOP going to their profile. Remove them from your life completely.
6. "But she was the one for me and she was so special and there was no one like her!"
First off she was not the one for you that is why you are not together. I am sure she was special that is why you allowed her into your life, but so is everyone else is in their own way. It’s time to find someone else special. Once you accept its time to move on, you will see that there are people out there that you can have fun with, just as much or more.
7. HOPE - There is always a bar somewhere with tons of single girls in it. Remember there is always hope. There will always be tons girls out there looking for single guys. It’s time to get out there and have some fun.
8. Do fun things. It’s time to fill the void and go out and do fun things. Hang out with friends, go see a comedian, skydive, ride a dirt bike, play some sports, anything that will get you in the ‘moment’ and out of your head. Think of fun things you like to do and GO DO THEM.
9. Get your life in high gear. There a few books that I suggest reading to give your life a purpose. 4 Hour Work Week - Tim Ferriss, Never Eat Alone - Keith Ferrazzi, Think and Grow Rick - Napoleon Hill, How to Win Friends and Influence People - Dale Carnegie. I highly suggest these books.
10. Get yourself some new bling. Get a new watch, phone, clothes, earring, if you have enough money, a cool car. Get something cool that like to look at and are proud to own.
Finally, I just want to say I know it sucks. I've been there. It does take some time to totally get over her, but make a solid effort to move on, find happiness in your life and enjoy it. There is hope and long term you will be better off. Good luck, have fun, and think of all the hot girls hot there that are waiting to talk to you. _________________ Now offering 1-on-1 in person counseling in NYC. For more info, send a PM
|