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Professor G
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PostPosted: Fri Nov 04, 2011 5:31 pm 
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Ok so I was at this club where I randomly came across an old friend from my first year in college(currently in 5th). I didnt know her that well during the first year due to her being with her bf but we had mutual friends so it wasn't as if we were complete strangers when we met again 4ish years later, her now being single. In fact she remembered my name without me giving it to her. When I was leaving the club I walked past her and she reminded me to fbook her to catch up. Heres how it went:

Me: Hey. Long time no see :)

HB: yes! it has been. It was good to see you! even if it was only a couple minutes :)

Me: It was def a highlight on my night though, even if it was too short. You probably get this a lot but your smile is contagious

HB: aww that is sweet! glad I brightened your night :)

and that was the last comment. Between my second comment and her last was about 3 days so I think I could have gone about it wrong. Maybe I should have tried to meet up with her instead, idk. What have I done wrong? How should I continue this?
Firstly, Hello. :)

Now to your question..

While I cannot specifically put a finger on it and give you the exact reason for her late reply ,simply because there could be a lot of reasons for her not replying sooner. I am going to breach the topic of facebook.

This new trend is very, very detrimental to pick-up and I want you to avoid this as soon as possible... starting from NOW.

If you want to get in touch with women, ask for their numbers. No, not their facebook accounts or e-mail ids, but their phone numbers. Trying to shift the interaction to online is like setting yourself 5 steps behind from 0. Why would you ever want to do that?

This is the basic flowchart.

FACEBOOK/GOOGLE+/All that shit --> PHONE NUMBER --> DATE --> SEX

You want to be as far in that line as possible, so that you can reach your goal sooner. So, now you can just go ask for her number, and text/call her. That'd give you the advantage of reaching her when you want and getting a reply out of her much sooner, as compared to a social networking site account that she checks only when she wants to give herself an ego boost.

Good luck.

And thanks for thinking of me.
Thanks for the response Don. I will take that advice immediately. We are gonna be good friends, I can tell.

_________________
All you can do is your best.
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zaidmagic
 Post subject: First text
PostPosted: Fri Nov 04, 2011 9:22 pm 
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Dear Don,

I just met a girl at work today we talked a little bit, then I told her to that I am going to leave and that she should give me her number. she does, and we talk a bit more. as I left the building, I texted her that " i dont know why? but I had to text you just as i got off xxxx. :P" ... she didnt reply. what do you think about sending a message like that?

also, you keep mentioning how you can build attraction by messaging. How do you do that?

Much appreciated dude :D
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dirtypreacher
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PostPosted: Fri Nov 04, 2011 9:28 pm 
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Hey man need your advice Again! I have met this girl while training in glasgow and honestly she is the best kisser I,ve ever met! And our text game is flowing really well but we met on wednsday night and she said she was too hungover and now shes away to edinburgh for the weekend so any tips on sorting out a day 2 ? And anyways to spice things up and get flirty with th texts?

_________________
I think that every successful man should have 3 women at his funeral. One that's crying, one that's smiling and one that's buying things on her laptop with his will.
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renjii
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 05, 2011 4:33 am 
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Hey Don
first of all thanks for your effort and time on this thread.

Need your advice on my problem..

i met this girl bout 3 months ago.. we've been texting each other from time to time..
she knows that i like her and here come the problems .. she got a bf. sometimes she complains to me bout her bf...

i date her 3 times since last 2 weeks but im stuck ever since... i dont know what to do

fyi i didnt do much during the date.. juz hanging out to have dinner and i fetch her back...

can you advise me what should i do to bring to next stage..

thanks
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Echoplay
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 05, 2011 3:16 pm 
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Taking some dmg in pride by writing this, but I need to learn from those better. Don man... I've been txting this girl on and off for the past month. She's a HB10 and I've definitely built her attraction. Talked to her on the phone few nights back, laughing and laughing and laughing, tons of commonalities, but... I just don't know where to go to reach that hook point?

I've got her to tell me about her past life a bit, how she was a tomboy b4 cheerleading, psychology field (she's 20 yrs old right now, I just turned 21), genuinely complimented her on her posture and got this back:

"Aww. That's sweet. Thank u and true in different ways. Now for me .. you go about and say things in a certain way I've never heard anyone describe before lol but I like it ..its what makes you u. You enjoy the simple yet educated things in life like me which I find most interesting : )"

That was a week or two back. I just don't want this thing turning into a stalemate and the "friend's" zone. She's definitely opening up more and more in RL though.

PS. I guess I'm the guy who's really interesting at work, as everyone's always around bullshitting w/ me. I even had her coming back to the break room when I was talking w/ some other girl (co-worker)... She looked at me as if to listen for a split second... and then realized what she was doing, lol.

After I got home ( I left in my motorcycle, I know she heard it ) I texted:

"Should totally call when u get off of work because we can chat it up"...

no response. What's next sensei?
Well, that was a nice message to read. :)

Now, the thing I see here is that you have mentioned nothing about you both hanging out together, in a private setting. Sure, there's a lot of comfort and attraction in the relationship, but unless you get a chance to physically escalate with a girl and make her feel the way you want her to feel through your touch, it's going nowhere anytime soon. So, that should be your primary focus for now.

Have a nice, light conversation and invite her out to drinks/dinner/some sort of date. You get the idea.

Also, another thing, the message you sent her comes off as a bit too vague, if you want to convey this message here's how you could go about it..

"Hey, you call me when you get off work, okay? Been wanting to talk to you all day. :)"

OR

"Hi! Let me know when you are off work, 'kay? I'll give you a ring, been wanting to speak to you all day :) "

Or something along those lines. Make it clear who's gonna call whom and give her some nice reason to smile about. She'll be looking forward to making/getting that call all day.

Good luck. And thanks for thinking of me.
Awesome, really appreciate it Don
!!!

_________________
"Will I regret not doing this? Yup... Guess I gotta do it then."
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Don Draper
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 06, 2011 8:39 am 
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Thanks for the response Don. I will take that advice immediately. We are gonna be good friends, I can tell.
Well, I am glad to hear that you are taking my words constructively. Good luck to you.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "
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Don Draper
 Post subject: Re: First text
PostPosted: Sun Nov 06, 2011 8:42 am 
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Dear Don,

I just met a girl at work today we talked a little bit, then I told her to that I am going to leave and that she should give me her number. she does, and we talk a bit more. as I left the building, I texted her that " i dont know why? but I had to text you just as i got off xxxx. :P" ... she didnt reply. what do you think about sending a message like that?

also, you keep mentioning how you can build attraction by messaging. How do you do that?

Much appreciated dude :D
Hell zaidmagic.

Now, I want you to understand the fundamental feeling behind your text.

You've just met her, and you are already confessing "I HAD to text you just as I got odd" and ending it with a few kisses. Look, there is something called investing too much, too soon. That's a trap you want to avoid.

I am not saying that don't message a girl if you had a good time with her, but keep it short and polite, something like "It was nice meeting you today.", works so much well.

Now to your second question.. how to build attraction through texts..

Well, it's simple. The way you would normally, flirty banter, DHV stories, tease her a few times.. in short the same route as you would go in a normal pick up applies to the text game too, so there isn't a need to segregate the attraction building process as something different and unique here, than otherwise.

Good luck.

And thanks for thinking of me.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "


Last edited by Don Draper on Sun Nov 06, 2011 8:55 am, edited 1 time in total.

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Don Draper
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 06, 2011 8:45 am 
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Hey man need your advice Again! I have met this girl while training in glasgow and honestly she is the best kisser I,ve ever met! And our text game is flowing really well but we met on wednsday night and she said she was too hungover and now shes away to edinburgh for the weekend so any tips on sorting out a day 2 ? And anyways to spice things up and get flirty with th texts?
Look, I am glad to hear that you're already past the first kiss stage with her.

Now, the thing to avoid is to not contact her enough and let the attraction die down. You need to keep texting/calling her, not at a frantic pace, but at a regulated interval, so as to develop a basic rapport and establish a comfort level between you two.

Have those deep, long conversations with her one night, on the other indulge in some playful, flirty banter with her. Keep her guessing, keep her intrigued and keep her interested and she's yours.

Then, when she is back in the city and you feel like you're at that point with her, ask her out to a Day 2.

Good luck.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "
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Don Draper
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 06, 2011 8:52 am 
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Hey Don
first of all thanks for your effort and time on this thread.

Need your advice on my problem..

i met this girl bout 3 months ago.. we've been texting each other from time to time..
she knows that i like her and here come the problems .. she got a bf. sometimes she complains to me bout her bf...

i date her 3 times since last 2 weeks but im stuck ever since... i dont know what to do

fyi i didnt do much during the date.. juz hanging out to have dinner and i fetch her back...

can you advise me what should i do to bring to next stage..

thanks
Hello renji (props on the name by the way. Bleach fan, myself :wink:) and I thank you for appreciating what I am doing here.

Now, to the question at hand..

I am very, very sorry to say that the way I look at it you're firmly established in her "friend zone". Here's the reasons behind my answer :

* 3 months and no physical act, which might be an outcome of attraction.

* 3 dates in two weeks, but you behaving like her chaperone i.e. strictly dinner and driving her back home.

* Her treating you like a pseudo-therapist and telling you about her boyfriend problems.

It's all the wrong things.

You need to freeze her out for some time, preferably a month or so. Regain your perspective. You don't want to be her "buddy", do ya? You need to understand that pick up is a failure with kino-escalation.

Go to Google and type DiCarlo Escalation Ladder. Download that pdf. That should help you out.

And last but not the least, NEVER become a girl's therapist. Next time she brings up her boyfriend politely tell her, "Look, that's your business to deal with. I'd rather talk about you and me here." A little slap on the wrist to get her to know that this is not free therapy here, this is a pick up.

Good luck. And I sincerely hope you will take my advice to your heart and work with it, as soon as you can.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "
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Don Draper
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 06, 2011 8:53 am 
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Awesome, really appreciate it Don!!!
Just doing my bit.

Glad to hear you're enjoying it.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "
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renjii
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Nov 06, 2011 9:14 am 
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Hey Don
first of all thanks for your effort and time on this thread.

Need your advice on my problem..

i met this girl bout 3 months ago.. we've been texting each other from time to time..
she knows that i like her and here come the problems .. she got a bf. sometimes she complains to me bout her bf...

i date her 3 times since last 2 weeks but im stuck ever since... i dont know what to do

fyi i didnt do much during the date.. juz hanging out to have dinner and i fetch her back...

can you advise me what should i do to bring to next stage..

thanks
Hello renji (props on the name by the way. Bleach fan, myself :wink:) and I thank you for appreciating what I am doing here.

Now, to the question at hand..

I am very, very sorry to say that the way I look at it you're firmly established in her "friend zone". Here's the reasons behind my answer :

* 3 months and no physical act, which might be an outcome of attraction.

* 3 dates in two weeks, but you behaving like her chaperone i.e. strictly dinner and driving her back home.

* Her treating you like a pseudo-therapist and telling you about her boyfriend problems.

It's all the wrong things.

You need to freeze her out for some time, preferably a month or so. Regain your perspective. You don't want to be her "buddy", do ya? You need to understand that pick up is a failure with kino-escalation.

Go to Google and type DiCarlo Escalation Ladder. Download that pdf. That should help you out.

And last but not the least, NEVER become a girl's therapist. Next time she brings up her boyfriend politely tell her, "Look, that's your business to deal with. I'd rather talk about you and me here." A little slap on the wrist to get her to know that this is not free therapy here, this is a pick up.

Good luck. And I sincerely hope you will take my advice to your heart and work with it, as soon as you can.
Hi Don
Thank you so much for the advise. I actually went out with her again just last night... we're out shopping for her annual dinner dress..
have some light kino with her ... i punch her arm when she tried to mess up my CDs in my car...i touch her hair etc etc...
yea i;m stuck in the friendzone n for sure i dont want to be just her buddy...

i will check out the Dicarlo escalation ladder.
thanks a ton !
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br0ker
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 06, 2011 10:36 am 
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Hey.. I could sure use your help on my text-problem, but don`t want to double post, maybe you could take a look?
On the same mid-game subforum as this, subject: "Retrieving a girl10er with a boyfriend from 1. /2. base"

Nice work on the other texts..
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arnolfo
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 06, 2011 11:20 am 
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Posts: 58
thanks don draper for the previous answer, i have another question now.
i dated a girls and we met three times....we just kissed and touched nothing more....everything was going allright and last time i met her we agreed to meet againg in a week.....after that i texted her and called her but she didn't anwer.She didn't answer two of my textes and two of my calls in a whole week so after that i decided not to contact her again......it's been three weeks since i don't see her and now i'd like to contact her again.
We were never been friends on facebook before so i'd like to add her (i don't know her last name and probably she doesn't know mine).
I'd like to send her a text and tell her to add me or give me her surname so i can add her.
what do you think is the best line to write to create interest (think about that previously she wanted to add me) and make her accept that.
I would write like this:
Hi, it's been a while, how are you ? i was thinking that we spoke about adding each others but we never did......add me my name is "xxxxxxx xxxxxxx" or give me your full name so i can add you.see you soon.
My line might be ok but doesn't create a lot of interest.....if you have a better one let me know....thanks don.
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Sebb
 Post subject: Too busy
PostPosted: Sun Nov 06, 2011 7:25 pm 
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Hey Don,

This situation might look very familiar to you, but couldn't find anything similar on the forum. Feeling a bit silly writing this, but any help would really be appreciated!

I met this girl who I picked up as a hitchhiker. That same night we went to a street festival. To keep things short we started texting and went for a date, which was fun. From that moment onwards things started to get long-winded. Initially after the date she didn't return my phonecall, but kept on sending text messages. Two weeks ago she went on a holiday and said she would get back to me after she comes back. This Friday I responded to one of her texts: " Fairly good thanks, lets figure out a time to meet, how is early next week looking for you?" Whereafter she took two days to reply and said "Am so glad you are doing good, so I am, currently freaking out about my time management. my life consists out of school, work and finding a new place to stat.but we should def. meet up soon!x"

Normally I would take a busy as a not interested. But this certain situation leaves me confused. Any tips if and what to send back?

Thanks a lot for your help!
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Don Draper
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Nov 06, 2011 8:50 pm 
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Hi Don
Thank you so much for the advise. I actually went out with her again just last night... we're out shopping for her annual dinner dress..
have some light kino with her ... i punch her arm when she tried to mess up my CDs in my car...i touch her hair etc etc...
yea i;m stuck in the friendzone n for sure i dont want to be just her buddy...

i will check out the Dicarlo escalation ladder.
thanks a ton !
Glad to hear you are taking my words positively.

Good luck ahead.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "
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