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Blondguy, you brought up an interesting point:
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As long as you remain flirty and keep the sexual tension between you in the interim, then as soon as she is done with this guy, you may well be next on the list!
People often emphasize that, if you wait too long, you'll get friendzoned. Maybe it was a limited believe, but I always thought that in any situation, as long as I don't make a move on a girl early in the encounter (ranging from few minutes to few days), that you will get friendzoned.
You in the contrary, if I understood it well, say that (in the context of she having a boyfriend), you can be her "friend" without being really friend zoned, as long as you can keep her sexually interested through flirtations and tension. If the moment arises, you can then take your chance without worrying that she'll see you as a friend
About what kind of interim are you talking? Is it about weeks, months or even possibly a year? Does this also apply to women without boyfriends (f.e. not having real intentions with her but keeping her interested in the case you break up with your girlfriend or when you're horny)?
And if you are friends then in some kind of way, do you have to keep the sexual/flirting vibe constantly or can you relax as well for a moment?
Really good question.
It's absolutely true that a lot of guys get themselves friendzoned by waiting around too long for the "right moment" to ask her out, or kiss, or make some kind of move. However, the issue here is not so much the time, but simply that there is a clear opportunity (i.e. you're both single, you're alone together, sitting near each other) and you don't do anything. That makes her believe that either:
(i) you're not interested [which makes her immediately backwards-rationalise that she was never that interested in you to prevent her ego from taking a hit by being rejected]
(ii) you're too much of a pussy to make a move [which obviously kills attraction] or
(iii) you're gay.
Now, if it's the case that one or both of you have partners, then as long as you show yourself to be a sexual person and make sure to spike attraction in her in various ways without physically escalating, e.g. talk about girls you're seeing, have her see you with other women, flirting with them, touching them, etc, be sexual and flirty with her, slap her on the ass, etc. then she won't believe any of those (iii) things - there was no real opportunity as at least one of you is in a relationship, you're not a pussy, and you're definitely not gay! As soon as the relationship ends, you can go straight in and escalate, and you can wait YEARS for the opportunity if need be!
As for not escalating on a girl when you're both single, you run into the risky territory of making her mistakenly believe any one of those (iii) things, but you can play the same game in a social-circle context by doing everything other than escalating on her (because there are mutual friends around and thus it's not really an "opportunity) and waiting for that opportunity to escalate when you two are alone, which can sometimes take a few months depending on how often you see her and in what context. These "slow-burn" cases can happen, e.g. you meet her for 5 minutes at a friend's party, then again at another friend's house for another 10 minutes, then at a dinner party for a few hours, and then finally run into her at a bar and then have the opportunity to isolate her. But, you MUST take that chance when it happens, otherwise it looks like you are hesitating or unsure of yourself.
CHAT
). Would direct be a bad style of game for me? Because I am not sure if girls would find me to aggressive since i'm already tall and bigger.
