Wow, props to sticking with it. I really feel you with your struggles, I'm the exact same way. 21 here still a virgin no gf no nothing either. The only thing I can say is I have much respect for you because the only thing I ever did was some shitty opinion openers for a few days then asking people for the time before dropping off with approaches completely.

That was when I was 17. I haven't approached since. Honestly I think it's really awkward having a conversation like that with premeditated lines.

And I completely feel the same way, so frustrated and sometimes I hate my life because it doesn't include a girl. What comes so easy to some is the highest mountain to climb for others.

Good luck man! I've tried writing a journal on here several times before, but have fallen off every time. I'll probably write one for myself, then maybe put it on here once I have some things of interest to talk about.

Some inner game advice: Read (or listen to, that's what I did) the Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. It has made significant improvements to my life in under 2 months.

As far as the rest of your life situation goes, the hardest thing is to suck it up and do the things you know you should be doing (work for school, talking to girls, improving your appearance and exercising). Once you start doing them, though, you'll start noticing the effects, and you'll start to enjoy the things that used to be chores. You have to start somewhere though. Oh, and definitely clean your room, and make it as attractive and organized a space as possible. Gotta have somewhere to take girls back to, be prepared for it.

Some ramblings that may help: Be more friendly to the vet coworker. She's coming from somewhere, too, learn to connect with her. Listen more intently when she speaks, and be proactive and decisive. If you see her struggling with a job or frustrated, offer to help her. It may be a little more work for you, but it'll pay off. Another thing, when you're deciding what to do on a weekend night, be very careful of going to hang out with other AFC friends. It becomes this illusion, that you're out doing something, but you're really just congregating to do the same old shit. If possible, motivate your friends to go out (don't be pushy though, if they're not interested it's pointless to argue, go alone). Being the guy who creates action in the social circle is a huge DHV.

Anyway, have fun and feel better! Don't think about failures, it's pointless, focus on what you can do to get the next success!

thanks for the support man! i really appreciate it

yea i understand where ur coming from dude. My name is actually brandon as well LOL. For the most part the approaching is really simple, but for me the anxiety is still there to, there's moments where sometime i just genuinely just don't feel like talking but still do it just cuz, sometime those random convos sometime put me in a better mood.

As for the frustrated of not having a girl, it really brings me down as well man, but when i remember that the only way im gonna get a girl is if i keep trying. That usually puts me back in my frame of mind.

I hope you get your journal started man and i hope the best for you as well dude. Thanks for reading and commenting!
Yea your right about the chore thing, i felt alot better after doing an hour of homework, i'm gonna do some more after i make another entry in this journal. I really appreciate your help slip n slide, your advice has helped me alot.

Update 09/25/2011

Welp yesterday i went to work, it was way more chill than last time. Partially because i got a ride to and from work for the first time. I worked with the veteran girl, the hb8, and a new guy who loves skateboarding. Hb6 came over and gave me a pound and talked to me for a little bit and then her shift was over i think, she was the girl i was a little attracted to cuz i liked how chill she was. I guess if anyone stood out to me that night it was prolly hb8. Mainly because she was kinda nice/flirty i guess. I'm real scared that i'm misinterpreting her kindness as attraction. I saw her facebook and she has a bf, idk girls that attractive aren't single it seems. I feel like i can't read women for shit, but here's why i think it can be attraction.

Throughout that night, if we'd be working and if it's a moment where just me and her, ill be working on something and then she'll see me working and then she'll randomly say "go brandon go brandon go!!!" as im working pretty much like a cheerleader. I'd usually just laugh, i said thanks one time. She did that like 4 or 5 times throughout the night. Then when we run out of display stuff we have to restock the display. That happened with these little toy balls we had. So then she was like "i need some BALLS(she kinda like threw it out there, can you go to the back and get some for me ". I raised my eyebrow teasing then she started laughing. I said "you know that sounds all kinds of wrong at work?" then she laughs "no no no i mean in these" and points and them. Then i get the balls and am about to pump them up, then she's like "you know how to blow it right?" i kinda start laughing, but don't mention how she worded it, and im like "yea". Afterwards, im dealing with customers and i was pretty social with them, after i had a moment where i was social with a few customer she goes "so it looks like ur just mvp tonight at work" and i just look her and shrug and say "i guess so".

Afterwards i happen to go to the stock room while she was in there and she's like

hb: what are you looking for?
me: some hot topic pillows to restock
hb: oh i got those
me: oh okay
hb: pump up the big balls over there
me: alright
hb: you know your not suppose to be in here right?
me: what???
hb: two people can't be in here at the same time

lets pause right here, that's bullshit. No one's ever told me that, plus it's been like 4 of us (including the managers) at the same time looking for shit in there. So i knew she was just fucking around

me: o really?, no one's told me that before
hb: yea well that's what they told me

*as im walking out*
me: well if we caught in here, it's all your fault
hb: no its your fault, i was in here first!

then i left the room.

Then we got super busy so we didn't engage as much, a little bit cuz i asked her for help and stuff. Later in the night she seemed less engaged in me, and looked tired, cuz we worked till like 3am. Her and the vet girl clinged more to each other throughout the night kind of (i notice all the girls i work with have a moment where they don't do shit, but talk to each other in a huddle).

I'd say of the 4 of us guys who work in our department, i'm probably most social? The guy i trained with is real chill, but he's mad quiet and doesn't have much humor. The new guy is def in his own world for sure, he has his own little radio when we stock, and he got super social when we closed and we're stocking. He was real introvert though around the customers. The other guy i think could be gay?, but his thing is he's like on thin ice with that job, works one day a week and doesn't do much, alot of the times i end up doing the shit he doesn't do.

Based on looks in terms of the guys in my department i def look the youngest and the most fit, alot of the guys are chubby or just stocky but idk that's kinda irrelavant with gaming. I mean just ranting on things that could possibly make me look better LOL, but at the end of the day my game still needs work.

The guy i trained with added me on facebook the other day. I hit him up on facebook chat to see how he was doing. We just talked about the schedules and the days we worked and who we worked with. Then he typed "yea hb8 told me she worked with you that day." He added her on FB as well so they probably chatted it up, he told me he digged her when the 3 of us worked together, but they didn't really engage each other, but who knows that could've changed.

At the end of the day i get these doubts about women, i guess it's because i've never got anywhere with a girl in general let alone one i thought who was attractive/liked. At best it's we're just friends who casually say hi to each other. So i just assume they don't like me from the start and are just naturally nice people. The one girl i went direct on in hs was like hb8 and had a bf to. Another girl i had a huge crush on in jr high ended up really liking me later, but that by that time i had already just said fuck it and moved on.

Right now i guess i even if hb8 has a bf i just wanna work on improving my relationship with her and not make things awkward, along with the rest of my co-workers, shit who knows maybe one of them can hook it up with someone else.

As for work, on friday/sat nights, i usually get hit on like a couple of times it happened with this one girl who was acting random as fuck when i was ringing up her candy, then she had the biggest smile on her face and asked me "you want some candy." and i turned it down nicely. 2 other girls also came over doing the bribing thing, i was definitely more playful with it this time but still was confused. I'm not really sure how to flirt let alone with hot female customers.

but yea right now i really wanna put focus back on school and my fitness, though i've improved in the work and getting out of the house, and being around women more, i been slacking on the other 2, so hopefully i can improve.

Goals:
Pass my classes
Read/understand women better
Get a number this week

Questions:
what are the best ways to respond back when a girl is being playful/flirty with you?
how do you show a girl you like her indirectly? (how do you flirt i guess)

I know I'm dominating this thread, but you have good questions and I want to make sure they get answered. It'd be great to get some other opinions in here though!

Don't make a move with this girl, especially if she has a boyfriend. It'll make things all kinds of complicated, and you don't need that. She can be useful for practicing flirting, though.

Flirting is almost completely push-pull. Here's an example based on how she started talking to you, don't ever try to fit things to a script, just pay close attention to the things she says.
HB: "I need some BALLS can you go to the back and get some for me?"
(Here you questioned the context, and the taste of the joke. Instead, amplify it, bring it into the open.)
Slip: "Oh trust me, you don't need balls, you're plenty manly already."
HB: "You're such a dick!" or "Haha nice. I really need you to go get them though."
Slip: "What? I'm just commenting on your muscular arms, you obviously work out " or "Who do you think you are?? Listen, no matter how cute you are, I'm not your slave."
Then go from there.

yea definitely ill take try this and trust me it's all good if you dominate in this thread i need all the help i can get. I also watched alot of vids of adam lyons speeches and stuff and a john sinn one, they were really good, it help me kind of put game back into a perspective.

Update 09/28/2011

Well i'll talk about work and about what just happened about an hour ago (nothing crazy)

Well at work, it was just me and the veteran chick i ended up closing by myself to for the first time, it was supppper slow to prolly the slowest i've ever seen. She's getting easier to work with, i think we have a better understand of each other. She's just has a low tolerance for people it seems so she comes off like a bitch, but overall i think she's chill. Me not really showing i was phased by that shit helped i think.

Also hb6 came that day to, it was weird cuz it was her day off and she was there with some other girl and a baby. I kinda think hb6 could be a lesbian just based off the way she dresses (first thing i noitced were the huge puffy DC skater shoes) and she's super cool(in like a guy kinda way), but even she has girly moments to so it's hard to call, idk why it matters.

I go up to her and say wassup and gave her a pound. She was expecting a hug the way her arm was out, i just wasn't thinking about it until after the fact. Then immediately after she's like "

hb6: hey you know thats my baby right *points at the baby*
me: oh really?
hb6: nahh im just messing around

and we have a quick laugh and that was it.

afterwards im with the vet girl, she's telling the hb6 about other workers fucking up. Then im near them labeling so i pretty much hear everything. Then hb6 leaves and the vet girl start talking to me about the other workers. How the new girl i worked with on wednesday left 20mins another chick who's she called a fucking idiot LOL, and another dude who kinda doesnt do shit. She was going in dude, and im like im thinking like shiiiitttt. I even said like "damn dude ur goin in right now" then i said "hopefully im not on ur bad side" She didn't say shit so idk what to think. At the same time she's telling me everybody she who she thinks is fucking stupid so i figured im doing alright with my job. I tried to match her frame, but idk i don't like being negative like that. Shes kinda like the leader of our crew to cuz she helped trained us, she tells the managers who works and who doesn't and they make schedules based off of it. I feel like the staff is starting to become comfortable with me. Like hb8 telling the trainee she gets to work me. I never really know or mind who i work with, i just wanna show that i wanna work more hours.

But afterwards vet girl left, it was the slowest hour and a half afterwards, i literally stood there, then we're pretty much closed, my manager comes to weigh tickets/tell me we're done for the day. Then some drunken customers come in and kept buying and refunding the same thing. I played it really well though, especially in front of the manager. Then i stocked some stuff and that was it.

Overall work is getting easier, im more fluent and am establishing relationships with my co-workers, feels good to feel improvement. I feel like im gonna get more hours (only work twice a week cuz its slow). But im still working more than a few workers who were there before me and im working all the busy closing shifts. Not to mention i closed alone.

As for today, i went to eat in the cafeteria, ate super unhealthy with a chicken western sandwhich and fries and some cake. I wanted to get full because i have no money, im in a mood now where id rather eat unhealthy and be full then eat healthy and starve (cuz i eat small when i eat good). I sipped soda for the first time in almost 2 months. It tastes good but the carbination was crazy. I forgot what carbonated soda taste like. Idk it was really sweet (sipped mountain dew). Poured it out and got water LOL. I watch my macros, cuz i only ate twice today, i figure the most i ate was maybe 1000-1500 cals today. 200-300 off of ham/turkey/lettuce. The rest off of that one meal. Prolly gonna eat when i wake up

But yea sorry about the drift, i was in the cafeteria and i sit with some friends who like, you know act cool and whatnot. They were talking about a party and how people get too drunk. Then i went with them outside (there was some school thing outside) As we go outside im out there with cake in my hands LOL (idk if thats what u guys call DLV but fuck it)

Anyway im out there chillin with people from school (i rarely do that). Then this one girl who's one of the RA's who's always been real nice to me. She says "hey brandon" i say hi back then she smiled at me, told me i look really nice, and i said thanks. I changed a bit, my hair is a nice fade and i'm look alot more slim. People that havent seen me in awhile always mention it. I was like on the brink of getting chubby, now im real slim, can see the lines in my abs. But it's hard to control how i eat with no cash.

With that girl in particular she's always been real friendly to me we kinda worked out together one time, idk i feel as if i never engage her back enough. Part of me doesn't because since the guy girl ratio, is so crazy at that school i just would feel like im competing for something i dont really want to. At the same time with the people in my school i give off a real mysterious vibe, because they i don't hang out with them but they see me leave and go places. That girl also changed her look alot to, i think i feel that way about her in terms of engaging because i feel like once i engage girls they get bored with me.

Afterwards i was with those guys listening about how they would beat people up if someone came at them sideways, their Ecstasy experience, and how they would never eat a girl out. (idk i dont see whats wrong with it, but alot of guys look down on it)

It was hard to tell if they were afc or not. They talk a good game though, but i never see them with girls at all.

but yea sorry about the long reads. Even if no one reads i still like to write everything on my mind out. I try not to leave anything out thats why its so long

other than that i watched alot of afc adam vids and a sinn vid. I think i need to start justifying, qualifying, and compliance. I never test women to know what my relationship with them is. So i'm probably going to try to practice those things.

What I Learned:
People aren't as cool as they like you to think
I'm more mysterious than i thought/Keep to myself (i never talk about girls with anyone really, which is prolly why i have this journal).
I'm starting to get better at reading attraction in girls. But i don't really how to follow it up from there.

Questions
How to make a girl qualify herself?
What to do after a girl complies?
How to break rapport? (i get stuck in this frame alot)

Update: 10/03/2011

Summary

Well this weekend was alright, i pretty much went to a melee tournament and then to work from there. I went to the tournament, it was alot smaller than usual. Saw alot of people i haven't seen in awhile, even got a couple "did you lose weight" comments. I got to enter a the teams event with one of my good friends and we got 2nd which was cool so i got my money back (im like top 5 in my area at it).

Afterwards i went straight to work from there and i worked with the vet girl and hb8. Saw my schedule and was disappointed, we have even less hours than before, and i pretty much work every saturday.

As for work, i went in real tired due to a lack of food and i really couldn't think straight. I got a little overwhelmed cuz i really needed food and kept fucking up. The vet girl was like "your off today", but i somehow turned that into a joking matter and said "shhhh, we all have those days where we fuck up, leave me alone!" but i said real joking and she just laughed. We're getting along better i think, then she just asked me a question it was hella out of the blue, but it could've been cuz i was fucking up alot and looked real tired.

vet: do you smoke?
me: used to, but i stopped
vet: are you kidding me, for this job?!?!?!
me: well i mean i was looking for a job in general, so i figured to just stop

(which is partially true, mostly because i thought weed was becoming a bad habit for me personally)

me: you smoke?
vet: yea..
me: yea i figured that
vet: how come?
me: cuz you looked lit when you walked in.

(for whatever reason its real easy to see when people are high)

vet: yea dude i was fucked up, why do you think i always bring in food and shit in here?
me *laughs*

then i saw a shitload of scars on her arm

me: damn, what happened to your arm???
vet: oh that, damn does it really look that bad??? *nervous smiling*
me: bad enough for me to ask you what happened...
vet: i got into a fight with my brother
me: ouch...
me: did you win??
(although i prolly shouldn't have asked that, she responded well)

vet: well.....actually.....no *laughs*

then customers came so we kinda stopped talking

Then afterwards i went on break ate a steak and chicken salad and felt loads better. I teased with hb8 more, im usually just kinda keep it casual. But i mentioned in this journal earlier how she bumps into me alot, so then i was like "geesh you're always in the way." Then we have these small moments where like playfully argue at each other.

Then things went smooth and we were stocking up after closing, i'd say about there is where the 3 of us all talked together. Hb8 asked me when was my bday super randomly, i trolled and i was like 9/11. They're both like "ohhh god". Then i said "yea i was lying my ass off it's definitely not 9/11" they both laughed but i never told them my real bday. Then they brought up working on next sat (cuz us 3 been closing on sats). Hb8 ask vet : Do you close on sat, she said no. Hb8 was upset and then asked me i'm like nah i dont close on sat. She's like nooooo. I have to close with that other guy (this dude who was on redbull and got super hyper as we closed). Then we closed and left. Afterwards i got picked up and stayed at a friends house.

Gaming

I feel like my inner game is imporving a little bit. It could be because im eating better and working out more. I just feel less stressed more relaxed. I also just been reading situations here on game to remember what to do. I honestly haven't really been focusing or putting any energy towards game. For the past month i been thinking afc-ish and just hoping some girl likes me, being needy pretty much. I notice it's going away less the need to impress.

Lately it just seems as if im blogging about how work went which i need to get out of that habit cuz i now im starting to get used to it. I'm not really trying to game any of my stuff. Even though hb8 is cute to, we just seem like 2 different people. I just feel as if i still need to create more of a lifestyle for myself. I want to find ways to go out and meet people, for now though i gotta catchup with school, still fucking that up as we speak.

Hey mate,

I think if you go out with the mindset of state shifting it would really help your inner game. I had been having similar problems myself until I stumbled across this video by Daygame instructor, Andy Yosha...it won't let me post a link here but put in 'state shifting and andy yosha' in the tube, and it should come up with the video.

Talks about how you should be going out with the mindset of getting into state as your primary goal and that you should follow a few stages to get their (i.e. starting off with easier approaches like as you mention, asking the time).


Laters

Hey man. Yeah these posts are getting a little work-heavy. You need to find ways to get out of the routine and meet women. I want you picking up girls at either a mall or a club every weekend, I'm sure you can manage that.

The good news is, I'm seeing some real improvement! Your interactions with your coworkers seem more positive, you seem more interested in understanding them as people, and you're not afraid to be playful. It will be hard at first to incorporate these traits into interactions with new, unknown girls, but now you can definitely see that you have them somewhere inside you. These positive qualities come with comfort and confidence around people, the more you talk with girls, the easier they will be to develop.

Also the scars on her arm are kinda sketchy. If you see new ones, make sure you're there for emotional support, it'd really be a shame if she cuts herself.

Thanks man, i appreciate it. I stopped doing this because i didn't wanna talk about work all the time. I do feel like i was improving and pushing myself when i was doing this so im gonna start up again. Prolly should have a post of how things have been for me lately, if not i'm typing it.

Update 10/14/2011

Well i haven't posted anything because to be honest i haven't really had any interactions worth mentioning in the past couple of weeks. Also now i hardly ever leave the house, i'm starting to suffer from that issue again. Overall i just sit at home a lot so it's been a drag. I do hang out with a good amount of friends still, the issue is they usually come to my place so we'll just chill here. I mean i could mention to do something else and usually they're down, the problem is we just talk about it, no action comes into play.

If anything i've improved on is just like, i've been putting hot girls off a pedestal less. Starting to treat them like anyone else. Issue is i'm never around them much, but even still it's kinda like whatever now.

I pretty much open girls up by asking the time (cuz i don't have a phone/watch) and that's getting really easy to do. But from there i don't really know how to keep it going from there. I pretty much don't say anything afterwards, which is kinda dumb, but i guess my AA hits at that point instead of the actual interaction. What i do notice is that shit sometime just breaks the ice. I just don't really know where to go from there. I don't really know how to engage a girl without asking her a question. I think it's because there's time where i do this and the girl will just not really engage back or go on their phone or something it makes me feel stupid for trying and then i start to get pessimistic attitude.

The way i'm starting to feel, is the only way to meet girls is to go to house parties/clubs. I mean i can't say the "i'm not a party a person" it's just the times i have are usually with people i don't trust. Always been a homebody, alot of it is mainly because i don't really trust the people that i know who do shit like that. The people i would be down to do stuff like that with down really do it. But i have been thinking about hitting up a bar just to see whats its like (never been to one).

Lately i was watching /adam lyons/john sinn stuff and i kinda realize just within the past months i think i did attract a couple of girls and didn't see it??? (based them following me everywhere/complying with me alot). I think it happened with those 2 girls on the bus and this girl i've known for years who i never thought would be into me at this hotel who ventured with me for like 2 hours around the hotel for no reason. Also this a super hot hb9 that i had a 1minute interaction with then she found me on facebook and added me the next day which tripped me out, that same chick i told her happy birthday yesterday on facebook she replied fucking instantly.

As of late i been feeling bad about myself when it comes to whole virginity issue, to the point to where i been thinking about looking for a prostitute. Mainly because since im virgin at first i thinking i wanted to lose it to not have that stigma of being a virginI(i still do). Now i wanna lose because i genuinely want to what being inside a woman feels like. I feel like i'd be ashamed of myself though for losing my virginity to a prostitute and i feel like learning how to attract women is better in the long run anyway. I just think im really eager for it to happen already. I also think i want a girlfriend, simply because i've never been in a relationship before and i want to see what committing is like. I also think im going to buy some condoms for motivation, that and i've never bought them before.

I think my goal for now is to get a phone number/make out with a girl by halloween.

Questions
How do you engage a girl into a conversation?
How to attracted a girl in a mixed set?
Should break out of my comfort zone and try to find other things i don't do?

Goals
Get a phone number/a makeout before Nov 1st
Lose virginity in 2011

I was trying to stay off this forum, too much reading and posted started to limit my own progress, but I got back on today out of boredom. Seems like you need a post to pick yourself up.

If you're opening by asking the time, it's easy, but you NEED to develop a way to go from there. Comment on her watch or phone. "Oh what kind of phone do you have?" "Do you like it? I need to get a new one, I just recently dropped my old one out a bus window" (or some shit like that, post whatever you come up with on here. You should have a very interesting statement like that one, designed to draw her question about it, then an interesting story to follow. Prepare DHV stories to chain into from there)

If no action is coming in, BE THE ACTION. Man up, come on. Get out to some bars. Any time you think "Oh, I should go to a bar tonight" and then let yourself get bogged down with thinking about it, STOP. The SECOND you notice that pattern, stand up, take a shower, get dressed and go OUT. Look up cool bars near you online and have a list ready to go at all times (be as friendly as you can to any staff, being known at a spot is great).

And who cares what girls you attracted in the past? Literally doesn't matter at ALL. Don't think about it.

Don't get a girlfriend until you can get one you're proud of, someone you can show off to friends, and who has a strong social circle of her own. You'll get there if you keep with it.

Jeffy (of RSD) got where he is by going out EVERY NIGHT, getting wasted and doing stupid shit and talking to people. If you have to, use alcohol as a crutch. It won't be pretty, and I recommend phasing it out as you get better, but it'll at least get you introduced to some girls and some numbers to work off of.

The more you go out, the more evident it will be, and the more other people will want to go out with you.

Update: 10/19/2011

So today hasn't even finished yet, but i guess i'll write this because i finally saw some kind of success today??? Well about maybe 3 hours ago i left my friends house to catch the bus home. I was walking i passed the stop, realized it, then ran back and made just as the bus was loading. A this point a run into an asian girl who's kinda cute I asked her the time and she pointed at the sign with the time. (cuz its a bus stop at a light rail station) and i was like "oh damn i didn't even see that" and she's like "well now you know" jokingly then we both laugh.

once she got on the bus she had a situation with the driver, with her bus pass or whatever. I go sit in the back, afterwards she sits across from me. Now usually i just wouldn't say anything after this, but idk something told me to and just see where it goes. So i was like "did you got a bus discount or something?. " Then it was like thats all she needed LOL.

The cool thing was i pretty much listened the whole time, my body language was pretty decent, didn't lean in or towards her. I just sat back the whole time, there where times she'd lean in if she couldn't hear me, instead of me leaning in to tell her i just said it louder (work kinda helped me with that).

She told me how she teaches in san jose, works at a mall there, and at a day care in oakland with kids and how it takes her 3 hours to get from sj and whatnot. I made sure i didn't just agree with everything she said, but not be a dick with it. (idk i feel like guys go overboard with negs and shit). Midway through the ride she talks about how she wants to run a business, and i kinda made a assumption like "oh so you're one of those business savyy people." while smiling. then she kept further explaining and whatnot. Out of nowhere she gives me her business card thats how i found out her name.

I told her about me working about d&b going to school and whatnot. She would tell about how she's been there and whatnot. I found out she's 27 which is cool to me because most interactions i had the girl are always younger. Afterwards we go on the train together and then i get off on the first stop. Before i got off though she was on the phone for quite a bit, then she was like yea our friend from atlanta is here visiting. I'm like "o really yea my mom and grandma lives there." She looked real surprised and was like really?? and how she went and whatnot. Then she goes on her phone and asked me "do i have facebook and email?" and i tried telling her but i dont think she got my last name well, i told her i'll just hit her up since i got her card already. (thats when i found out she was Vietnamese).

So i shook her hand, told her it was nice to meet her and left. Made sure not to do the success grin until the train left LOL. Now im just thinking of when/how to contact her. I pretty much got her email/phone (couldn't find her facebook).

Overall i feel like i was a little lucky, she kinda escalated more than me, which is cool, but at the same time i want to learn how to escalate, maybe i did but just didn't see it. Idk if shes even attracted to me like that, but i guess enough to sit near me and give me her card, so yea.....

But yea i figured id contact her either tomorrow or friday. I'm just confused as to what to contact her about. Should i do it via phone or email? I mean of course i want to see her again, but i just don't know what to do/where to go. I don't want it to look like a date, moreso like we're just hanging out together, i don't wanna put pressure on her nor myself. But yea for now those are my biggest concerns.

Also credit to slipnslide for all the advice you been giving me, much appreciated

Questions

Should i contact this girl by phone or email (i have both)
How do you ask a girl to hang out with you?
How to hang out with a girl in a casual setting (im assuming like coffee or something, but other than that).
What's the best thing to do?

i'd really appreciate the help. =)

Update: 10/21/2011

Part 1

well so far i emailed the girl i met on the bus, it was weird because when i first emailed her she responded super fast, then the next time she responded the next day. I understand she's busy, i'm not really trippin to hard as to her not responding immediately she seems like a real busy person.

Although i am confused as to if she likes me or not, i mean she gave me number/email/facebook all these things when all she has is my email. At the same time im still confused idk, i guess it's because i feel as if this might not go anywhere.

so far heres our transactions towards email

Me: Hey hb it was cool meeting you yesterday, hows life treating you?
HB: Fantastic! But very tiring. How's yours??
(idk i prolly shoulda asked why her day was tiring but i wasn't really thinking)
Me: I'm doing pretty good but nothing special. Watching i love you man, you seen it?

From there i didn't hear from her, then when i woke up i got this email from her
Her: Yes I have, pretty good movie
Here, search me on facebook: *her facebook* Have a nice day!

Part 2 Below!

well i had to post 2 parts because for whatever reason it keeps cutting out this part of the text

Part 2

that have a nice day got to me, it just seemed like she doesn't wanna talk but im looking into shit too much[/b]

I haven't responded or anything, but i'll assume i'll just add her on facebook tonight. At this point i think i need to build some kind of attraction and be playful. I was bland and boring so far mainly because i'm kind of one on of those people who needs to establish contact before i really say anything, i basically didn't know what to expect. From here i guess i'll try to change the frame with her slowly, it's hard because i wasn't super playful with her, i teased a little, had moments where i made her laugh, but my transaction with her is kinda hazy so she might feel that way to.

Do you guys have ways of being playfully texting and making a text conversation/ chat fun? I think im trying to build attraction at this point cuz i feel like i already have some comfort

but yea i figure to add her on facebook tonight because she'll be home and i can talk to her, plus our interaction can be one of the last transactions she has in her day.

I'm also gonna go to ross and the store today, and do other things, yesterday i hung out with a few friends, idk i don't want to invest too much energy on this, kinda like i'm doing now.

Questions:
- Do you guys have ways of being playfully texting and making a text conversation/ chat fun?