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PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 7:27 pm 
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Alright so in an earlier topic I made I mentioned this girl from Finland that I was working on. Anyways things with her have been moderately successful so far, not too much to show for it but for someone newer to PUA I think it's pretty good progress. Either way I just found out that like four of my friends are into her too. This is getting to a real messed up point where we're all competing over the same girl, starting to really hate each other, and frequently making an ass of ourselves. I'm sick of this shit, I wanna remove myself from the situation completely but I've got it bad for this girl. (Maybe it's because she's the only girl I've had this much trouble with?) Anyways what's the best course of action here? Do I just try to forget about her and move on? Or is there a course of action I can take that would help prove I'm better than these other guys? I'd hate to have to lose a few of my good friends over a girl, but would really hate to lose a girl to an asshole like my friends. Any advice would be appreciated.


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 9:10 pm 
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Alright so in an earlier topic I made I mentioned this girl from Finland that I was working on. Anyways things with her have been moderately successful so far, not too much to show for it but for someone newer to PUA I think it's pretty good progress. Either way I just found out that like four of my friends are into her too. This is getting to a real messed up point where we're all competing over the same girl, starting to really hate each other, and frequently making an ass of ourselves. I'm sick of this shit, I wanna remove myself from the situation completely but I've got it bad for this girl. (Maybe it's because she's the only girl I've had this much trouble with?) Anyways what's the best course of action here? Do I just try to forget about her and move on? Or is there a course of action I can take that would help prove I'm better than these other guys? I'd hate to have to lose a few of my good friends over a girl, but would really hate to lose a girl to an asshole like my friends. Any advice would be appreciated.
How much do your friends matter to you? You have to realize that the more all of you keep trying to get her, the more complicated things are going to be not only for you, but for the whole group.

Apparently she's getting tons of attention from you guys, and this could just become a game for her.

If I were you, I'd move on and let my friends fight each other over the girl. If she's interested in YOU, she might try to come around. In that case, you know she's into you, so no more competition required.

Try not to have the "scarcity mentality" man.

Good luck ;)

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PostPosted: Fri Oct 07, 2011 1:50 am 
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Alright I was looking over my post again and I realized that I may not have put up enough info to give everyone the full scope of what's happening here. I also read Bansario's post and noticed how helpful it was based on the information I already gave, so I'm going to use his post to break down the situation better see if it gets the same general response still.
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How much do your friends matter to you?
Well to be quite honest, the friends involved in this situation at least, are complete douche bags but they keep me entertained. I like them, but if something really went wrong between us I could find someone else to chill with. Girls like this one on the other hand are very rare, I have ridiculous standards (really limits my ability to game btw) so when I find one I genuinely think is hot or fun or whatever I'm very reluctant to let the chance to get her slip by. I think I'll take the girl over them if it really comes down to it this time.

Quote:
You have to realize that the more all of you keep trying to get her, the more complicated things are going to be not only for you, but for the whole group.
I've noticed that so I've tried my best to stay out of their little feuds, but as soon as I finally start to get some time with this girl they all gang up and act like complete pricks to me specifically. (I don't really get that, they're only making themselves look bad. I mean how immature can they get?) When they start doing that I feel the need to talk crap back to defend myself and we all end up looking like douches.
Quote:
Apparently she's getting tons of attention from you guys, and this could just become a game for her.
That's a possibility but I don't think that's really the case. The only two people in our group she really seems interested in is me, and a friend of mine, (I'll just call him Devon, not his real name but it makes things less confusing if we have something to refer to him as since there's more then one friend involved here) so if this were a game to her I think she'd be playing us all against each other in a much more elaborate way. I don't know though she might just be making a game out of this to keep her entertained while she's in America.
Quote:
If I were you, I'd move on and let my friends fight each other over the girl.
I don't know about this but maybe it is the best move. Devon is a much better PUA then I am though, he's been doing this for a lot longer then I have, and he's always gotten results from what I've seen. If I stopped competing with him, it'd be over I think, I'd basically be handing her to him because he's the only other guy in the group that she's shown any genuine interest in. This is not something I want to do, because Devon is a heart breaker, he "nails and bails" I suppose would be a term for it. I on the other hand have a sort of "Code of Conduct" (which also really restricts me game, but it helps me sleep at night) that generally prevents too many broken hearts. I mean I at least let things fizzle out on there own before I see someone else, or make sure it's an open relationship before I go around doing whatever the fuck I want with whatever girl I want. I don't like seeing people get pulled in by Devon's game only to be hurt so that might be another reason this matters so much to me.


Alright so now that I've given some more specific info, do you guys think Bansario is still right? Or are there some varying opinions? I mean I agree with what he said to a degree, but I want to be fairly certain I'm making the right move before I do anything.


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 08, 2011 11:32 pm 
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So is it safe to assume Bansario's opinion is the general consensus? As I said I want to be sure I'm not making a mistake by removing myself from this situation. Losing my chance at getting her is bad enough, but if I lose her to an ass like Devon I don't think I could live with myself.


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