Flaking, consistently. Advise



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PostPosted: Sun Oct 02, 2011 1:34 am 
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Hey guys,

This is my first post, or at least the first one I can think of on this forum so I hope it's in the right place.

Girl I am currently interested is either really busy or really flaky.

I thought I'd show the last conversation in as much detail as I could in hopes one of you can break down what i could be doing wrong or what I should be doing.

This will be time/text and what I did.

17:00 Me: Movie at 21:30?

17:10 Her: Maybe, I hate to pull this, but it depends on what time I finish hw

17:25 me: Gotcha, finish fast.

19:00 Her: Blah blah, Tonight is my turn to dd for a friend, told her I'd do it because its her last night she can drink etc.. So I don't think I can do the movie. : ( :( Im really really sorry.

Now at this point I haven't responded. I got annoyed, really annoyed but realized that me getting annoyed and showing her that I would be DLV. So, I didn't respond.

20:15 Her: I feel terrible for ditching you. : (

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm pretty sure her feeling bad here is not what i want. I should be hinting towards my indifference so its not a negative nor positive ? Is her responding when I didn't a good or bad thing?

I plan on texting her a few minutes before we were supposed to meet.

Is her texting me again after i haven't texted her a good thing?

What should I be saying?

-Anyone

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Anyone


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 02, 2011 2:32 am 
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Hey man, I'm going though the same position. I want to believe that she's busy and can't make it but, I've ran text routine after text routine and it wasn't until i gave up on routines and just started to fluff and lose interest was when we started getting a good flow going, it felt like it was natural. So basically, when she did flake she said the same thing, " sorry, feel bad... blah blah blah". I wouldnt think she would try to lead me on and say that. But then again i could argue the other side that she's too nice to say that she doesnt want to chill with me.

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PostPosted: Sun Oct 02, 2011 6:49 am 
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So, what did you do? I mean. The girl, when I act uninterested and whatever is there. Nd when she says she flakes.... She may still come by... But I have a hard time dealing with it in the meantime. Either commit or don't... How do you communicate that? If its not gonna go anywhere, when do I know? when do I say... Fuck this, I'm done. Sorry sweetheart, but you're not worth my time??

-

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Anyone


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 02, 2011 8:07 am 
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Real men call to ask the girl out.

Pussies text.


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 02, 2011 8:23 am 
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pretend for a second that you have other girls phone numbers in your phone, now pretend this girl did this to you, she flakes on you, but you had 50 other girls phone numbers, what would you do?

would you keep trying to contact her?

would you care, like how you are caring right now? or would you be indifferent?

would you pretend like you were indifferent, or would you actually be indifferent for real?

girls can sense this kind of shit, abundance = status

if your time is not valueable, it is easy to sense, when you are high value, and your time is high value, girls want your time

flake = clear dis-interest, even one time, 2 times = game over time for deep freeze

go to google, and type in, signs that she is not interested, ???? profit,

almost every list will tell you, flaking, bad body language, talks about other guys, takes long to respond to you, always busy, and non-responsiveness (aka 1 word answers to everything)

NOW THE ADVICE TO YOU, GO GET 50 PHONE NUMBERS, MAN UP SON, IT IS WAY EASIER THEN YOU THINK, GIRLS GIVE THEIR NUMBERS OUT LIKE CANDY, EVEN IF THEY ARE NOT INTERESTED, GET 50 PHONE NUMBERS, START TEXTING, MAKE SOME FRIENDS/GIRL-FRIENDS, GET SOME ABUNDANCE,

it is not about that one special girl, it is about how many flies can the spider add to his web, and how efficent is the spider at catching his prey
(it is not about the outcome, it is about the process)


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 02, 2011 9:42 am 
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Well, you're doing good.

The important thing is that you understand two things :

1. If you're annoyed by her action, you can be annoyed but you just cannot let her know about your annoyance, and hence, you don't reply. That was exactly the right way to go about things.

2. Much more important than creating a frame is to maintain it. Going for the indifferent frame is fine, maintaining it is another thing altogether. And by the look of things it seems that you're doing a good job of maintaining it too.

Now, to the things you can improve upon...

Flaking happens primarily not because of lack of attraction but because of a lack of an established comfort level between two people. Unless she is comfortable with you, she won't spend alone time with you, that being said attraction and comfort building should go hand in hand, can't do the first without the second and vice-versa.

So, my advice would be to keep talking to her either via calls or text, or even better in person, as much as you can. And get her comfortable and attracted to you, as much as you can. Once you've achieved that, she or for that matter any other woman, will never flake on you.

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" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 02, 2011 8:11 pm 
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Thanks,

I appreciate the advise and help. Now you said maintaining the frame? What else could I be doing? Get other numbers, make my time valuable? Any pointers on that?

-Anyone

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Anyone


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 02, 2011 9:23 pm 
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It took some figuring out but after this weekend my target flaked again. I take that as that I fucked up somewhere along the way of greeting to closing so what I need to do is just tighten up on my game. I just sat down and had a hardcore thinking session and picked apart what makes me look like a afc and what made me look like a pua. I found it was my inner game. I had the wrong mind set this whole time, I had one- itis. So next weekend I'm going to hit the local parties, malls, clubs, and coffee houses, come in under the radar and run Gamblers stealth attraction routines. One thing that really helped me that I learned from his courses is that Day game sets up night game. Meet a bunch of girls, invite them to the same club so it seems like I know everyone there. merge the sets and if it doesn't work out with all, then at least I have something to build off of. Familiarity opening is always grand too hhaha :wink:

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The trick is to unlearn before you can learn. Respect.


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 Post subject: I want more
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 8:30 am 
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Hey guys,


So tonight it pretty much ended....

Im pissed, but feel good also.. She isnt worth my time. I fucked up, but in the moment she said what she said. I saw every goddamn awful thing I don't want in a relationship...

And then it dawned on me.... I want a relationship. I don't want to just fuck someone.


Is there a difference between what we are doing here and what i want?


what the fuck do you do when you get the girl attracted to you.. To fucking want you...

What do you do when you want more then just sex? Is what were doing still the same? How can you treat a woman you genuinely like with the same principles you'd treat a women you want to fuck?

Is there a difference here. I fucking pray to GOD there is. I don't mean to sound rash, but is all this forum here to do is to get us laid. Is there nothing more then that? Is that all were looking for?

Im upset I was rejected. But luckily I have a date for tonight (its like 4:00 am)..


MY main question is this. HOW can we transform this lust, or attraction into something more.. I've never been the guy to just want sex. is this a weakness? I want more. I don't just want the physical. I want all someone can give me?


How can I capitalize on this????


My plans for tomorrow night....


Take her to a movie... What genre?

Should I take her to dinner?

Should I pay? If not, why not? Is chivalry dead?

Can i not display the characteristics in myself to her. as the same I want to show the women I want to marry? If I don't, will i forever be bound to simply sex?

Of course i want girls to be attracted to me.. But I want MORE. I want the pain, the happiness and most of all I want love. What can I do to get that? Can I even take the advice here to show me the way?


I want someone who has one through the same thing to talk to me.

Post on this thread, or pm me and lets talk this out.

My heart its too big to let this shit get in the way. I want more, more then what simply sex can give me. I want something that LASTS.

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Anyone


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PostPosted: Fri Oct 07, 2011 1:55 am 
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People get into the game for many different reasons bro. It depends on the person. Rest assured we'll figure it out and by we I mean the community. First I want to say, lets sarge until we drop. Second, sit down and think and ask why. seriously.

-Why do I want A relationship,

-why not multiple relationships?,

-why is sex not enough?

-why do I want more,

-what is a relationship to me?

-am i really ready for this? ,

-what happened in my past that influences my actions and desires now?

Nature vs Nurture. Surroundings and the way we were raised. personally relationships are no fun to me, why? I got out a relationship that was emotionally destructive. Why is having one night stands a must for me and why do I want to pickup the most beautiful women in the world? Because I'm young reckless and I want to have fun.

But all that aside. talk to her, phone game bro. ask her what her favorite movie genre is and come to common ground. Dinner is up to you man. cocky funny, and irresistible asshole is great, but also have some honesty in you conversation so you dont completely push her away, be very tongue and cheek romantic. ex: " I think I'm falling in love with you" jokingly dont come off serious and heres way, you'll make that connection that everyone wants, the feeling of love but your only joking so she doesnt get turned away. And get her thinking about future encounters that way it'll be easier to f-close her, she'll be under the impression that you'll see her again. inner game, be confident, its your world not hers. You got kick some ass. Personally I can't tell you shit on relationships but I can help you with gaming

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The trick is to unlearn before you can learn. Respect.


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PostPosted: Fri Oct 07, 2011 1:59 am 
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Quote:
Hey guys,

This is my first post, or at least the first one I can think of on this forum so I hope it's in the right place.

Girl I am currently interested is either really busy or really flaky.

I thought I'd show the last conversation in as much detail as I could in hopes one of you can break down what i could be doing wrong or what I should be doing.

This will be time/text and what I did.

17:00 Me: Movie at 21:30?

17:10 Her: Maybe, I hate to pull this, but it depends on what time I finish hw

17:25 me: Gotcha, finish fast.

19:00 Her: Blah blah, Tonight is my turn to dd for a friend, told her I'd do it because its her last night she can drink etc.. So I don't think I can do the movie. : ( :( Im really really sorry.

Now at this point I haven't responded. I got annoyed, really annoyed but realized that me getting annoyed and showing her that I would be DLV. So, I didn't respond.

20:15 Her: I feel terrible for ditching you. : (

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm pretty sure her feeling bad here is not what i want. I should be hinting towards my indifference so its not a negative nor positive ? Is her responding when I didn't a good or bad thing?

I plan on texting her a few minutes before we were supposed to meet.

Is her texting me again after i haven't texted her a good thing?

What should I be saying?

-Anyone
Good article about flaky women: http://bosproject.com/blog/why-do-women ... ys-part-1/

Hope it helps :)

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My hobby: www.megaboing.com
If you enjoy the reading, please "Like" it :)


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PostPosted: Fri Oct 07, 2011 6:03 am 
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I was HAMMED when I wrote that last one..

I just can't help but feel that sex isn't the only thing I want. I want something meaningful, but I want to learn how to get that meaningful shit to happen.

I guess what I'm saying is. Where do I start?

What's your idea on how to start?

Pick up a book? Or can you break down some stuff for. Tell me what to read/do, I'll do it and post back and update you on what's going on. The good the bad and all there is in between.

Thanks for your help man, I appreciate your replies. You constantly give good advice, especially when I need it most.

You are the MAN.

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Thanks,


Anyone


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Oct 07, 2011 6:18 am 
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If a relationship is your goal: start talking. Say to her you're not in for a one night casual thing. Go on dates and see if you like her.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Oct 07, 2011 7:26 pm 
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I'm not really all that interested in that girl anymore. What i wanna know. Is where can I start. I want to start going on MORE dates, faster, and figure it out from there.

Whats my first step?

_________________
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Anyone


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 11, 2011 3:20 am 
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Get out there and just be come a social monster. Develop your natural game and just learn how to speak to any social group. Just put yourself in situations where it forces you to be the center of attention. For me, I'm constantly speaking in front of large groups of people, and performing. I'm a massive choir and theater nut and I play guitar and sing at local bars on the side. Yeah I failed horribly at first but then I learned. You got it man, get out there and become the natural.

"When you are out of your comfort zone, you will begin to grow"

-Vixen

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The trick is to unlearn before you can learn. Respect.


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